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    gx10's Avatar
    gx10 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Mar 19, 2010, 06:37 AM
    Ex getting married to someone
    Sharma.
    So... my EX is getting married in about 20 days after the breakup with a medicine student.
    Why does this bother me! I can't really figure it out. I KNOW I would never get back together with her even if she did come back to me... but it does! I feel moody, pissed off, and snappy with everyone! I have been dating, and realize she is not for me... but I can't get past this right now. Why? I know I have a ton to offer someone, but haven't found her yet, and that's OK with me. I guess I feel cheated in a way. Not even a month
    And she is getting married! ***!?

    I don't understand why she did this. She was with me for almost 2 year I loved her like crazy and whatever was possible I did to keep her happy. But out of sudden I found out she cheated on me for a guy who is doing residency. Who is not a doctor yet.. and then 20 dayz after I heard that she is getting married to this guy.

    I am really pissed of and sad and don't know How to react in this situation

    Help me guyz...
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #2

    Mar 19, 2010, 06:44 AM

    She's moving on - permantly..

    Perhaps that its so soon after your breakup,and the cheating element that has you frustrated.

    My advice,you dodged a bullet,be thankfull you have the chance now to find love with someone who will want you too..

    Ignore the ex's situation,its nothing to do with you now.
    gx10's Avatar
    gx10 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #3

    Mar 19, 2010, 06:58 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by redhed35 View Post
    shes moving on - permantly..

    perhaps that its so soon after your breakup,and the cheating element that has you frustrated.

    my advice,you dodged a bullet,be thankfull you have the chance now to find love with someone who will want you too..

    ignore the ex's situation,its nothing to do with you now.
    :confused: I think you are right but it really hard for me to forget her so easily..
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Mar 19, 2010, 07:31 AM

    Being cheated on, and rejected for another, would make us all feel as you do. She must have been cheating quite a while, but you didn't know.

    It will take time but eventually you will get over it. Just enjoy doing your thing and celebrate your freedom from this lying cheater.
    gx10's Avatar
    gx10 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #5

    Mar 19, 2010, 07:49 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    Being cheated on, and rejected for another, would make us all feel as you do. She must have been cheating quite a while, but you didn't know.

    It will take time but eventually you will get over it. Just enjoy doing your thing and celebrate your freedom from this lying cheater.
    The only thing which I hate about her. After the breakup she said her friends that I am nice and caring guy and she still loves me and misses me. So my question is if she is getting married to some one why the hell she still thinks about me. And last week she emailed me that she wants some pics from me which we took together. Why she needs those pics I don't know it does't make any sense to me
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #6

    Mar 19, 2010, 08:16 AM

    It will if you ignore what she says, what she does, and why she does it. Obviously her feeling were not strong enough to be a loyal partner, or a faithful one.

    That doesn't mean she hates you though.
    harriejansen's Avatar
    harriejansen Posts: 126, Reputation: 16
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    #7

    Mar 19, 2010, 08:37 AM

    My ex wife left me for somebody else, 6 years ago, also during my marriage still. I was devastated. A couple of months ago he left her. Now I wish they were still together, as she is starting to harrass me again, about money, kids, etc.

    I hope this helps a bit for you to put things in perspective...
    neverme's Avatar
    neverme Posts: 1,430, Reputation: 270
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    #8

    Mar 19, 2010, 08:58 AM

    She is a user and a cheater and you got off easy... it seems this guy isn't going to be so lucky.

    I don't like to say once a cheater always a cheater because I don't believe the world is black and white and I think that people can change but they have to want to, getting married so quickly seems to me like she just wants to stick her head in the sand and not deal with her situation. Even if she has been seeing him longer than you know this is still, in my opinion, too early to be getting married?

    Marriage is supposed to be a life long commitment, I don't think that this relationship can possibly have the basis for this in such a short time of really being together, you know without that pesky thing called a boyfriend in the way!
    myagony1234's Avatar
    myagony1234 Posts: 101, Reputation: 43
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    #9

    Mar 19, 2010, 09:39 AM

    She liked you, loved you, stayed with you for 2 years, and gave you a lot fun and love. But she chose the soon-to-be doctor over you to marry. That was her choice. I know it is hard to accept it, since you love her so much. But there is nothing you can do. It happens sometimes. Swallow your anger, and move on. You will find someone else who loves you, and wants to stay with you forever. She is not the only women in this world.

    Think this way. You are lucky to loose her now before you grow older and see her ugly, wrinkly, cheater's face. Does it make you feel better? Everything has pros and cons. Nothing is ultimate. Focus on your happiness not what you lost and what she is getting. I know it is still fresh, and it sucks. You will feel better eventually.

    Just to make you feel better. I will tell you my story. I married to a good looking & sweet man, and I thougth I was very lucky. Well, I found out that he is ONLY user, and I am trying so hard to get out for any cost.

    In your case, you gained not lost. You lost the cheater, and gained the full future ahead by your own. Be happy.
    notsogreat's Avatar
    notsogreat Posts: 49, Reputation: 24
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    #10

    Mar 19, 2010, 11:11 AM

    I was with my ex for nearly ten years, well he proposed to me after seven years of being together, then he dumped me and moved in with a mutal friend within months. He proposed to her within a year and they are getting married this August. Although I know that I am better off without this liar and cheater, it still stings. I think that it is normal. She is only contacting you probably out of guilt, maybe she is trying to make you jealous and rub it in your face, or maybe she realizes that she cannot be alone, unfortunately no one but her can tell you the reasons behind her actions. I loathe my ex, but I wish him well, even after all of the hateful things he has done to me, I wish him well and have no choice but to let him go. Your ex probably doesn't know how to be alone and jumped at the first opportunity after you so don't take it personally.
    gx10's Avatar
    gx10 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #11

    Mar 19, 2010, 02:42 PM


    I agree with all of you friends.. I think this is the time to move on and start a new life..
    Thanks and appreciate your comments.
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #12

    Mar 19, 2010, 04:26 PM

    The way your feeling is quite normal , I wouldn't sweat it and just let time do it's thing.

    I think your lucky you found out now and she disappeared from your life before you invested more of yourself in her.
    gx10's Avatar
    gx10 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #13

    Mar 19, 2010, 11:53 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by neverme View Post
    She is a user and a cheater and you got off easy...it seems this guy isn't going to be so lucky.

    I don't like to say once a cheater always a cheater because I don't believe the world is black and white and I think that people can change but they have to want to, getting married so quickly seems to me like she just wants to stick her head in the sand and not deal with her situation. Even if she has been seeing him longer than you know this is still, in my opinion, too early to be getting married?!

    Marriage is supposed to be a life long commitment, I don't think that this relationship can possibly have the basis for this in such a short time of really being together, you know without that pesky thing called a boyfriend in the way!
    [I] agree and I feel the only reason why she did it to me is because of money, She thinks that she has a future with him but not realizing that he is from India ( same country as I am from) and wants a girl from medical background according to his family members and parents. And he met with my ex in Strip club where she used to work without my knowledge. But than also why this guy is getting so crazy about this girl and getting married to her. And he also know we share bad together for two years and about to have child. And she is a stripper.. how could he accept her I mean a normal person will think about doing this 100 times before getting married, And being a doctor marrying a stripper does not make any sense to me..
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #14

    Mar 20, 2010, 12:36 AM
    I can only add,you are well rid of her.

    As for the husband to be,it doesn't really matter why,does it?

    Focus on moving on and your own healing.
    myagony1234's Avatar
    myagony1234 Posts: 101, Reputation: 43
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    #15

    Mar 20, 2010, 06:03 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by gx10 View Post
    [I] agree and I feel the only reason why she did it to me is because of money, She thinks that she has a future with him but not realizing that he is from India ( same country as I am from) and wants a girl from medical background according to his family members and parents. And he met with my ex in Strip club where she used to work without my knowledge. but than also why this guy is getting so crazy about this girl and getting married to her. And he also know we share bad together for two years and about to have child. and she is a stripper.. how could he accept her i mean a normal person will think about doing this 100 times before getting married, And being a doctor marrying a stripper does not make any sense to me..
    It is getting ridicules.
    You dated strippers for 2 years, loved her, wanted to have children with her and still heart broken. Why the doctor married her? Same reason. He loved her for some reason.
    I know your angry, but instead of having bad mouth over your ex, degrade your ex relationship all together, just move on like a man.
    If she was striper, she gave you favor by marrying someone else.
    It seems you guys did not respect or honest for each other ANYWAY during relationship.
    Breath deep, calm down, and let it go, friend.
    gx10's Avatar
    gx10 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #16

    Mar 20, 2010, 08:46 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by myagony1234 View Post
    It is getting ridicules.
    You dated strippers for 2 years, loved her, wanted to have children with her and still heart broken. Why the doctor married her? Same reason. He loved her for some reason.
    I know your angry, but instead of having bad mouth over your ex, degrade your ex relationship all together, just move on like a man.
    If she was striper, she gave you favor by marrying someone else.
    It seems you guys did not respect or honest for each other ANYWAY during relationship.
    Breath deep, calm down, and let it go, friend.
    It been almost 1 month I did't heard anything from her not even I contacted her after one week of the breakup, I never left voice mail, email, phone call and also I am not in a contact with any of her friends anymore.

    I think I am recovering, got a new project at work getting graduate next month. I think I am better without her in my life..

    More verbal slaps are appreciated:eek:

    Thanks guyz for all your love and support
    gx10's Avatar
    gx10 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #17

    Mar 20, 2010, 08:47 AM
    Hj
    myagony1234's Avatar
    myagony1234 Posts: 101, Reputation: 43
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    #18

    Mar 21, 2010, 12:31 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by gx10 View Post
    More verbal slaps are appreciated:eek:
    Sorry for slapping you so hard. :)
    I hope you understand I am doing it to help you to get out of the useless confusion.

    Listen, friend,
    I know you are heart broken, but it is useless and she is worthless.
    Your ex married soon after breakup. Right? Nobody is jumping & marring a stripper. It means your ex had worked on this guy for a while, she was a double timer and you were her backup plan, once she started to see this guy. You just did not know it, since you were in love, and blinded.

    Now you know her true ugly color. Get over it already. Plain and simple. Why do you still think about the lousy girl?

    You have a lot of things to do, and you will have bright future. You will meet a good girl who will make you not only happy, but alo proud. Smile!
    Once again, your ex saved you from the unfaithful marriage & painful divorce. Thank God.
    gx10's Avatar
    gx10 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #19

    Mar 24, 2010, 10:50 AM
    Thanks for your response.. its just like an eyeopening experience.. thanks
    myagony1234's Avatar
    myagony1234 Posts: 101, Reputation: 43
    Junior Member
     
    #20

    Mar 24, 2010, 12:04 PM

    Yes, it is. I am so sorry for your pain, I feel for you, and hope you feel better as time goes by.

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