[lakers21]

I'm 22 and burned out.
I've been in school for 4 consecutive years and it has taken a toll on me. I know I should have taken a break, but I was determined to continue striving. However due to other issues going on in my life, my grades have collapsed. My GPA dropped from a 3.5 to a 3.1 in one semester (fall '09). During Christmas break, I got pumped to turn it all around, but this semester alone has been a wreck for me and pushed me back even further:

My family is struggling financially as well as emotionally (dad is sick, my brother has psychological problems)
I have no job
My grades are horrible/I'm behind in school
I've lost the desire to study. I cannot focus.
My relationship with my first boyfriend just ended.
I've lost all my friends.
My car just broke down.
People are just condescending towards me... like they can sense something is wrong and try to make a mockery out of certain things. I can't turn to anyone because no one really understands.

I've gone to a therapist but it wasn't helpful. I normally go to the gym to stay in shape, but now I've been laying around all day. I cannot force myself to get out. I crash on my bed and don't get up. I try to go to class but can't. And if I do, I can't focus on anything. It's gotten to the point where I feel like I'm too behind to catch up; however, if I don't do something this semester, I'll never make it to Dental school.

Any pointers please?

[cdad]

I have to ask so I hope it doesn't offend you. But have you been eating the right foods? Or have you been binging on sweets to get you by and to help pass the depression?

[lakers21]

Actually my eating habits have not changed. I'm still considered healthy weight and do work out daily. However, lately I have been rather negligent in my workouts... obviously because I'm in a bad state now.

[cdad]

I just wanted to do a quick diet check first. That often times is the first thing to go and can cascade problems.

Something you might try is think of a way to make lists for yourself. Short term and long term. Keep them short. Things you need to do in an hour and ones you need to get done for the day. And keep your eyes on the prize for the big stuff. You might find that your either taking on too much at this time or you just needed that extra push. You have a lot on your plate already. You can always expand the list one you start crossing everything off.

[jmjoseph]

I think you need to get back to the exercise. You know how good it feels to be in shape, so do it.

So, have you given up ? What is the alternative? Failure, that's what. So what you need to do is to try and snap out of this funk that you are in, and carry on with your goals. I know how it is having a sick father, but is it going to do him any good to see you this way? No.

Try reading something inspirational, like Lance Armstrong's book.

Remember, that we all have peaks and valleys. You are just at a low point right now. Do whatever it takes to get past it, and carry on.

Are you a quitter? No, probably not, so get tough, eat right, exercise, and make things happen in your life. Let us know how things are going.

I wish you luck.

[Aprilmay12]

First, let me say I'm sorry. I have quite a bit of empathy for you as I'm getting out of quite the storm myself. But just remember that life just takes big dumps on you sometimes (excuse my potty mouth lol). Problems seem to happen all at once, don't they? Even though this doesn't help you now, just remember that your hard work will pay off and life will once again be happy and on track.

For now, blow some steam off. Go throw some nice pretty china against a brick wall or yell "f**k" as loud as you can in the middle of the street--I promise, if you do that then you can't help but laugh and a little laughing goes a long way.

I don't know you, but you can get through it. And when you do you'll be a stronger person.
*Big Hug*
Take care of yourself!

[KBC]

I have been there many times in my life,many.

All things seem to be going in the wrong direction all at once,and even my best efforts don't make things better, only prolongs the suffering.

The cascading problems have made my perception of anyone's actions or comments towards me,or even not directed at me, all seem negative,demeaning,condescending, etc.

Once I was in that state of mind,nothing would end it, friends would seem to be distant,and I would feel like I wasn't desirable to them, lessening my self-esteem even further.'

Jobs and relationships,focus and desire,passion and sleep, all were a mess,and I saw no way out.

If I am off here,let me know, I won't pursue this train of thought further as I wouldn't want to plant any ideas on this, it's tough enough,what your going through.

[lakers21]

Wow thank you all for your support. I'm glad that there have been others who understand. I guess the most difficult part of it all is the fact that I'm going through this alone with zero support system. I forced myself to go to the gym last night and to watch the Lakers game (in which I'm a huge fan of... although they lost) just to get back to the swing of things. And yes, it did make me feel a bit better. A little goes a long way.

I just feel guilty for my relationship to end more than anything. I thought we were making an attempt to work through our issues, and it seemed that way for a while; however I was caught off guard when he emphasized that we were done and he wanted to be friends. Deep down, I know he sees me more than a friend, but lately our issues have been compounding. We have been deluding ourselves into thinking that we're just "friends" especially immediately after breaking up. It's rather the opposite and we're both despondent if anything. So I haven't spoken to him in a few weeks just to cool off. It has worked, but I do miss him. I have come to the conclusion of apologizing for my wrongdoing, not as a beg or a plead, but rather to establish a sense of closure between us. I just don't have the confidence to do so. I don't know if now is an appropriate time or if I should wait after my birthday (which is next week) or what.

On the bright side, reading your feedback has been encouraging and I just wanted to thank you all once again :)

[Gemini54]

I know what it feels like to be totally burnt out! Breaking up in a relationship always compounds how bad we feel, and honestly, sometimes we just need a break from it all.

Can you defer for a year - is it vital that you finish without taking a break? Even if you can't defer your studies, can you take a weekend where you go somewhere different - like a national park or by the sea, and just rest in a peaceful place?

Also, don't immediately assume that your friends don't want to listen or don't understand - you can never know until you ask them for help or connect with them. People are much more understanding that you realize. You won't know unless you reach out. Finding a different therapist is also important - just because the last one didn't work doesn't mean that there isn't someone who will help.

I think you need to reconnect with people - part of the reason you feel burnt out is because you haven't shared what is happening to you with anyone else.

[lakers21]

Whenever I bring anything up, people change the subject or they don't give any sort of feedback. It's funny though, because I always am there for them providing feedback and listening for hours and hours. Perhaps I'm a doormat and have been too nice. So I'd rather not bring anything up at all

[KBC]

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by others when they don't do much else than express depression or always seemingly negative thoughts, the 'woe-is-me' syndrome.

They might feel this way, I don't know them or their responses to you, this is only speculation on my part.I am not saying this about you..

Do you think keeping the feelings and problems inside is going to help you get past this?I don't.

Perhaps a therapist,counselor,preacher, those that are there just for this,your support,not a friend who doesn't want to help, or can't, but a professional who does this and is trained to aid.

Just an idea.