[cburish]

My daughter had been seeing a 2o yr old boy , she is now 16, for the past 3yr against my better wishes. Every time I try to intervine I get verbale and emotional abused by both of them. All she wants to do is turn 17, quite school and live with him. They are bothe smoking pot and doing other drugs. He sell drugs most of the time. Now I find out she is pregnant and wants to have the baby. I just enrolled her into a drug rehab but ow have to see if they will still take her being pregnant.

I can not take care of her anymore. I have 5yr of my own to think of. Where can I send her? What can I do to keep nhim away from her and the baby. He says he wants to be involved but not pay child support. He has a part time job.

What can I do legally to him and to her to get help.

[450donn]

Have the guy arrested for statutory rape, get your daughter into a drug treatment program. Get the state involved. She is endangering the baby by her actions and some states take that very seriously.

[J_9]

It all depends on where you live. In many areas you call the police. This is statutory rape and he goes to jail and has a permanent sex offender label placed on him.

He says he wants to be involved but not pay child support? You aren't believing this are you? Guess what... he's going to get a big 'ole slap in the face when you make your daughter file for child support and he goes to jail for not paying.

Firstly you need to find out if this is rape in your area of the world, secondly you talk to her doctor about the marijuana use, thirdly you report them BOTH to the police once you have said pot in your hand.

Look, I am a L&D nurse, I know the risks and dangers of pregnancy at a young age... I also have to deal with the babies born to addicted mothers.

Your area of the world dramatically affects what can happen here, so that would be good to know.

[artlady]

Call child protective services in your county and they will intervene on behalf of the unborn baby.She is endangering the welfare of an unborn baby and they will take action.

If they fail to do so ,keep at them and be sure to get the names of everyone you speak to.They are overwhelmed with cases and some simply slip through the cracks.

Their intervention will most likely stipulate that she attend some sort of rehabilitation program.

She is going to hate you for it but someday when she is a parent ,she will understand you had her best interest at heart.

Sometimes its all about tough love.

[cburish]

This is all happening in the state of SC. His parents are saying I can't have him arrested because I knew they where sleeping together. I have tried to keep them apart but as you know if they want it they will find a way andthey did. I do have apt with the solicitors office and have spoke to them in the past. I have filled out paper work on him and her being out of school. They tell me the courts are just backed up and it will take sometime to pick her up. Well now she is pregnant.

[J_9]

Unfortunately, in the state of South Carolina, the age of consent is 16. So he cannot be prosecuted as a sexual predator.

Also, unfortunately, marijuana is considered a minor drug offense when it comes to pregnancy. Sure the baby will have withdrawal, but little permanent side effects. There are some though: low birth weight (even lower because your daughter is so young), premature labor and delivery, asthma, immature lungs... I could go on.

Since she is of the age of consent, what I suggest you do is not only contact the Department of Child Services, but talk to the OB she is seeing for prenatal care as well.

[cburish]

Thank you for rthe advice. I am making phone calls as we speak. It's just every time I try to discuss the issue with my daughter or her boyfriend I get yelled at, threatened and it has been an on going battle for the past 2 yrs. If you know of some other place I can send her for help please let me know. I have a 5yr old that I have to raise and I don not want him to be in this inviroment with her. Thank you again for the help.

[ohsohappy]

Unfortunately, in the state of South Carolina, the age of consent is 16. So he cannot be prosecuted as a sexual predator.

Also, unfortunately, marijuana is considered a minor drug offense when it comes to pregnancy. Sure the baby will have withdrawal, but little permanent side effects. There are some though: low birth weight (even lower because your daughter is so young), premature labor and delivery, asthma, immature lungs... I could go on.

Since she is of the age of consent, what I suggest you do is not only contact the Department of Child Services, but talk to the OB she is seeing for prenatal care as well.

I believe in the original post she said that it had been going on for 3 years, wheich means she was 13or 14.. Maybe then she can have a case, if her daughter was sexually active before she turned 16.

My daughter had been seeing a 2o yr old boy , she is now 16, for the past 3yr against my better wishes.

It might be tough to prove because it was a few years ago, but hopefully she has a chance.

[J_9]

Hun, are you a single mother?

Why do you allow your daughter to talk to you that way? I was frequently reminded as a teen... I an 30+ years older now... "I brought you into this world, I can take you out!" From my father.

You tell the BF that he is on YOUR property, not your daughter's... call the cops for trespassing.

[cburish]

He never comes to my house. She always ends up somewhere with him. Lots of times at his own Mothers home. I do try to take over her life but the threat of calling DSS to say I have hit or done something to her is always in my face and backed up by her boyfriend. To tell you the truth I am very scared of him. I am separated from her Father. By the way he says it si not his problem getting her straight. He supplies the drugs to her from what I have been told. I have no concret evidence of the drugs, Pot, being supplied by either one of the men. Just know what I have heard and I can tell when she if hihg. Left message for Juvinile Solicitors office, hopefully they will call back and tgive me soime insight as to what my options are.

They are both asking me to let them get married and live with his Mother now. Just got that call...

[cburish]

I guess you all can tell from my typing I am very upset. Just to le tyou know I do have a 22 yr daughter that has gone to college and dueing terrific with her life. Just this child is lost and I really want to help her.