[heronk38]

okay, so here's the scoop. I'm a freshman and high school drama has erupted full force upon me this year. With family issues and guy problems, the LAST thing I need it to be constantly bashed, emabarassed, hurt, controlled, and depended on so heavily by one of my best friends.

He is so dependent on me. He thinks it's up to me to supply him with something to do all the time. He has other friends, but he won't go to them. He also always comes up to me when I'm with other friends, says something degrading and embarrassing about me, and then turns the topic to him and lets me there to be left out of my own group of friends. He also verbally bashes me every time he's depressed, which is all the time.

I've told him so many times how I felt about this, and he says he has no way of controlling it, and that he just doesn't know how to stop. So recently I told him to just back off for a few weeks and we'll see how things are after then. But I don't know what to do. I mean, it's so painful to be around him, but when he's happy, he's a good friend.

does anyone have any advice for how I should handle this? Please and thanks! =(

[Wondergirl]

Perhaps use a lot of humor? When he disses you, turn it around into a positive ("Your hair looks weird today." "Hmmm, I wonder if I can turn it into a Halloween idea for next year."). When he's depressed, find subjects that you know interest him and ask open-ended questions.

[Devorameira]

You sound like a caring friend, but remember - you don't have to take his abuse. Since talking to him hasn't helped, have you thought about talking to his parents? It's possible that he needs some counseling. High school should be fun - don't allow him to drag you down.