[fixyouup735]

I'm past the required age in New York state where I am allowed to "emancipate myself," so to speak. After trying to legally move in with my mom at age 14, through the court system, my father hired a lawyer against me. My mom and I lost the case, then my father took my mom to court again for child support. He also won. I have not seen a dime of the child support money and the conditions here, at my father's house, are horrible. We fight constantly, and my step-mother is... well, we won't get into that. So, I'm trying to make sure it's legal for me to move in with my mom, without going to court. Is this possible? Any advice is highly appreciated.

[ScottGem]

First, on the child support, your father feeds you, buys clothes for you and provides a roof over your head and a bed to sleep in, correct? If so, you can't say you "have not seen a dime of the child support money". You don't need and aren't entitled to an exact accounting of how he spends the money. On the other hand, if he doesn't feed or clothe you adequately, you should be going to your family services agency for help.

You don't say how old you are, if you are over 18, you can live anywhere you want. I'm not sure what the age of emancipation is for NY, but if you are past that age, you should also be able to live anywhere you want.

[Fr_Chuck]

Ok, you went to court and you and your mom lost, There really has to be a serious reason for a court first not to give a child to his mother, and second not to listen to what a 14 year old wants. So I would say it is far beyond just an attorney.

Next your dad is entitled to chiild support from the non custodial parent. She should have been paying for as long as your dad has had you and have been divorced.

Next no you don't get the money, the money goes to him, to pay him for her share of raising you, for food, for electric, for water, for rent for clothes, for being mother and father when he has to when she is not there.

And no, you can't move out without the court giving you permission, he can merely call the police and have you brought back, and if your mom took you in, he can sue her in court for violation of the court order ( hold her in contempt) .

To emancipate yourself, you have to file in court ( hire your own attorney) you have to prove you can live on your own ( not withsomeone) that you have a job and the ability to pay all your own bills)

So you live with your dad and try to perhaps understand his rules and that he had a right to remarry. He did not need your permission for that either.

[s_cianci]

At your age, usually the court would give a lot of weight to your preference unless there's a compelling reason why you shouldn't live with your mom. Did the court give any indication that this was the case? Also, regarding the child support money that "you haven't seen a dime of", do you mean that your mom never paid it to your dad or do you mean that your dad hasn't given it to you after receiving it from your mom? If your mom is destitute and unable to pay support on your behalf, that could explain why the judge ruled against you living with her. On the other hand, keep in mind that child support is meant to be spent by the custodial parent for expenses on behalf of the child. Your dad is in no way required to give you any of that money directly. As long as he's adequately housing, clothing, feeding, medicating and educating you, there's little you (or anyone else) can do in that regard. In any case, if your father has legal custody of you, then no, it is not legal for you to just go live with your mom or anywhere else. Your mom is of course entitled to visitation and should seek an order for that if there isn't already one in place.