[DB]

Hi all,

Since this is my first post let me introduce myself. I am Hristian from Croatia and I am 18 years of age. Well my problem is the following. I dated a girl for a month, I liked her very much (the first one I treated very very well) but we broke up. The reason was that she was just out of a long relationship and that she never expected that she will end up with an other boyfriend. So when we broke up we stayed friends and continued dating/seeing each other but I still had my feelings for her(even asked her for prom: she said yes). One moment I thought it would be stupid to continue getting hurted, I told her the truth, didn't spoke for a while but after a few weeks we kind of missed each other and started seeing each other again(this time no deep feelings). Now she told me that she is seeing an other guy(no hard feelings) and that we will be just friends. So now I am really confused... What to do now? (I still like this girl, but not that much to adore or almost love her ;) )

Thanks in advance,

DB

p.s. from previous experience: just friends doesn't have to mean not seeing each other

[talaniman]

Sounds like you were used for a prom date. Leave her alone, and explore other options, and opportunities, and realize friends don't have to work hard to pursue friendships, and since she has a boyfriend again, give her space to enjoy him.

I hope she isn't the only friend you have because if it is, you really need to change that fast.

[jaime90]

It is odd that she broke up with you because she just got out of a serious relationship and couldn't see herself with another guy, and now she is interested in someone else? You need to leave their relationship alone. At this point, contacting her while she has a boyfriend can potentially cause problems between everyone involved. The last thing you want to do is pose a threat to her and her boyfriend.
As far as her boyfriend goes, it is okay for a man to limit contact that his girlfriend has with her ex's for the integrity of the relationship, and protecting one another against past feelings or the temptation to unfaithfull.

If you want to remain friends, you need to give yourself a long time of no contact with her in order to heal. (I would say no contact whatsoever, but the break up seems like it was pretty much mutual, and not so traumatic.)

[DB]

I saw there was a misunderstanding, sorry for my bad english :P
Extra info:
-Prom is yet to come
-The new guy is not her boyfriend but just some random guy she is seeing at the moment (like I was when I met her ;) )
-I am not threatening anybody, would go away otherwise (am confused, not creepy :P )
-Got a lot of friends, no worries about that

My concern is: What is my position? Will I still be a bootycall/weekendromance or will I lose her (like not seeing her anymore in private )

[jaime90]

Don't be a weekend romance. You can easily get wrapped up in those feelings that will plague you for the rest of your life. If she is having "interests" in other guys, hanging out with her privatly probably isn't the best idea. If you think that it would do no harm, make the choice to only hang out with her in group situations. No more one-on-one.

[DB]

Thank you very much for your advice!

[talaniman]

Put it like this, I doubt you go to the prom with her, so look around for your own date.

Booty call?? Don't make me laugh and really embarrass you.