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    tragedy's Avatar
    tragedy Posts: 96, Reputation: 11
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    #1

    Dec 2, 2009, 10:18 AM
    She cuts all ties. And bitter
    I dated my ex for almost 2 years. She was the one who initiated the break up after a huge fight. It was a nasty break up. She physically and verbally abused me such as slapping, choking, and said really nasty things in front of her housemate when I was trying to apologize over some text I sent her when I was so angry with her comments. I lost all my pride, she didn't even respect me at all. Somehow, I still pleaded her to stay because I loved her so much. Unexpectedly, she cut all ties with me and whenever she sees me, she will put on a not really pleasant face like I have just burnt down her house! I tried to live with it and be nice. It didn't help. She was full of resentment and completely ignored me. Obviously, she didn't feel bad on what she did to me and she said she no longer loves me. I dropped her an email two weeks ago after a month no contact wishing her all best and apologize for what happened in the past. I was thinking maybe we could be friends again. Unfortunately, she behaved even worse, telling her friends my email contents (I found out from another friend of mine) and finally I realized that she doesn't worth my time and she completely doesn't even respect me. Now I'm going full swing no contact and I deleted her contact on my mobile few days ago.
    But there's one thing that makes me wonder so much, why does she need to carry such resentment? Why does she need to put on such expression on her face whenever she sees me?
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #2

    Dec 2, 2009, 10:26 AM
    You know,if someone treated me like that I would avoid them like the plague! And would not give them a second thought,thank your lucky stars you got out in one piece..

    As for why she is so nasty when she sees you... its her problem,let her get a stomack ulser (sp) from all that venom.. look the other way and walk really fast in the other direction.

    Saying thank you thank you thank you I'm not with that hound any more!
    itried's Avatar
    itried Posts: 249, Reputation: 108
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    #3

    Dec 2, 2009, 10:29 AM

    She does all this because she's obviously a huge b-i-t-c-h. You're lucky to be rid of her now that you've seen her true colours. Congratulations!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Dec 2, 2009, 10:38 AM

    It's a thin line between love, and hate, and she crossed it. She doesn't sound like a great person any way.
    tragedy's Avatar
    tragedy Posts: 96, Reputation: 11
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    #5

    Dec 2, 2009, 05:38 PM

    When we were dating, she was a very nice girl. But it was out of my expectation that she could be this cruel to me. I thought we had good times too. No doubt I had done stupid mistakes after the break up like emailing, IMing but not excessively. I stopped as soon as she blocked me out, removed my contacts when I asked her not too. I was in terrible pain weeks back wondering how could she did this to me. She lost her love for me in a second! Like an idiot, I was trying to win her back, pleaded her to stay and of course my mission failed. I felt so betrayed, stupid when I got to know she was sharing whatever I sent her with her friends and it makes me look like I'm a plague or something. Doesn't she have some sense of privacy?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #6

    Dec 2, 2009, 05:47 PM

    Obviously NOT!!
    rockie100's Avatar
    rockie100 Posts: 313, Reputation: 64
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    #7

    Dec 2, 2009, 05:59 PM

    Try not to look back on this with fault or regret... See her for what she is now. Recall what you are feeling, for when she tries to contact you. Stay strong and in time you will find your ideal. This girl is not one.
    Im sure anyone that she has shared info with, knows that this is wrong. And they probably think she can't be trusted with their information either.
    paxe's Avatar
    paxe Posts: 793, Reputation: 158
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    #8

    Dec 2, 2009, 06:11 PM

    Good thing you got out while you can. You obviously deserve much better than that!!
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
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    #9

    Dec 2, 2009, 06:28 PM
    Sometimes it's best not to over analyze a situation or person.

    You could go on asking why? Why? Why? And tie yourself up in knots.

    There is NO way of knowing WHY - but her actions tell you that she's actually a horrible, nasty, vindictive person.

    As hard as it is, try and put her out of your head - and thank the heavens and stars that such a revolting person is no longer in your life.
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #10

    Dec 2, 2009, 06:51 PM

    Don't waste your energy wondering why she does anything , its really not worth the grief. Stand tall and just ignore her and you'll gain your dignity back when people see your not worried by it.

    Just be thankful you got rid of her before you spent more of your life with psycho woman.
    tragedy's Avatar
    tragedy Posts: 96, Reputation: 11
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    #11

    Dec 2, 2009, 07:49 PM

    Bad news! One of my friends just told me she forwarded the email I sent her around! This really makes me look really stupid! And I'm pretty sure her friends will be sharing with others too! How could she? What will she get by doing so? The more I apologize, the more she thinks hell great of herself. She slapped me in the past when her parents came over to her place and they saw everything after a heated argument and things I said. I've never laid my hands on a woman. I hope one day she will realize what she did to me. But somehow my gut feeling is telling me that she will never feel sorry for what she puts me through.
    paxe's Avatar
    paxe Posts: 793, Reputation: 158
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    #12

    Dec 2, 2009, 07:52 PM

    If she wants to do you harm, then so be it. I believe in Karma, so what goes around comes around. You shouldn't be shameful of anything, you need to move on and don't look back.
    sabrewolfe's Avatar
    sabrewolfe Posts: 420, Reputation: 96
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    #13

    Dec 2, 2009, 07:56 PM

    Because she despises you for whatever reason. Leave it go and move on before you make it worse on yourself.
    Gemini54's Avatar
    Gemini54 Posts: 2,871, Reputation: 1116
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    #14

    Dec 2, 2009, 08:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by tragedy View Post
    Bad news! One of my friends just told me she forwarded the email I sent her around! This really makes me look really stupid! And I'm pretty sure her friends will be sharing with others too! How could she? What will she get by doing so? The more I apologize, the more she thinks hell great of herself. She slapped me in the past when her parents came over to her place and they saw everything after a heated argument and things I said. I've never laid my hands on a woman. I hope one day she will realize what she did to me. But somehow my gut feeling is telling me that she will never feel sorry for what she puts me through.
    Oh for heavens sake! Why would you give any energy to this psycho woman any more? Stop apologizing, stop contact and stop worrying.

    Who cares what her friends think?

    You know what she's like - isn't that enough? She's poison.

    A Shrink for Men

    Read this and consider yourself lucky. You got away.
    emopunk7's Avatar
    emopunk7 Posts: 1,052, Reputation: 161
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    #15

    Dec 3, 2009, 01:44 AM
    Hey my ex also threw things at me and cursed me out and yelled at me in public and when I would say lower your voice she would get more mad. I would say can you close your window of the car so that nobody hears but she kept yelling with the window down. She also would go out behind my back when she said she was sleeping. She scratched my face and made me bleed and yelled at me just because I wanted to be with my family and not her for an hour. Still if you read my thread everyone here made me the bad guy. I actually had to try and convince everyone that she was crazy... Now that I am getting stronger I can see things better. I just don't get the advice I was getting for the first 19 pages... pisses me off. Finally TMan got the message of how far she took things and in that post on page 20 I think, his post started my progress and I think he is the greatest for that!
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #16

    Dec 3, 2009, 02:05 AM
    I think there is probably a very good chance that you have not been the only one to have been at the mercy of her wrath. Most likely she treated everyone with little respect, unless she wanted something, then could be as sweet as pie. People that abusive toward the one they are supposed to love the most, no no bounds in self-control, and people are merely tools to get what they want.

    Her friends are likely too scared to say anything, and agree with everything she says, although I'd bet money on them knowing better.

    This may be the best possible thing that could have happened, not that I wish to see anybody physically abused, but it didn't sound like you were about to split with her, and you would have kept on taking it.

    That she set you free has turned out to be an opportunity for you, not a loss. Use this time to think about what it is about you that could accept the behaviour you did, and why you chose to put your needs on the back burner to please her.

    Take all the good of who you are, and the lesson's you will learn from this, into the next relationship. You only invested 2 years instead of 20 with babies in tow. That is a blessing. Let her go on to abuse the next fellow, and move on. As the others have said, you deserve much, much better.
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #17

    Dec 3, 2009, 05:28 AM

    You're lucky to be shot of her-she's a classic case of good riddence to bad rubbish.
    tragedy's Avatar
    tragedy Posts: 96, Reputation: 11
    Junior Member
     
    #18

    Dec 3, 2009, 06:25 AM

    You were right Jake2008. If she didn't initiate this break up, I guess I would just keep taking and taking all those craps from her. I know it sounds stupid but I guess I was too blinded by love at that time. Now all I want is to focus on myself. She took away my dignity and respect. The funny thing is one of her friends took me out of the friends list when I don't even speak to them. It's crazy! I'm not surprise if she bad mouth me to the fullest and shared with them all the messages I sent her. To my opinion, I think it's childish to share personal messages with friends. None of it was offensive but it makes me feel like an idiot because I looked like I was clingy, desperate in the messages. The more I think about it, the more I want to get her out of my head. The more I think about it, the more I wish I didn't meet her. As a result, I wouldn't need to go through such heart aches.

    Emopunk7, I had that yelling too from her in the public and she will increase her volume when I ask her to tone down. What's the most intriguing part? She will say that I cause her to do so.

    Thanks guys for your advice. I'm working towards NC and I've never felt better!
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #19

    Dec 3, 2009, 06:37 AM
    I think some of it with her might be maturity too. I can honestly say that during my dating years, no matter how nasty the breakups were, or the causes, I never, ever, badmouthed or shared information on the ex, just to make him look bad. It is a very hurtful, unnecessary thing to do to somebody.

    SO good to hear you are feeling better, and working on the no contact. Be prepared for more drama (likely), but hold your head up, and your dignity intact and you'll be just fine.
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #20

    Dec 3, 2009, 09:22 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by tragedy View Post
    Bad news! One of my friends just told me she forwarded the email I sent her around! This really makes me look really stupid! And I'm pretty sure her friends will be sharing with others too! How could she? What will she get by doing so? The more I apologize, the more she thinks hell great of herself. She slapped me in the past when her parents came over to her place and they saw everything after a heated argument and things I said. I've never laid my hands on a woman. I hope one day she will realize what she did to me. But somehow my gut feeling is telling me that she will never feel sorry for what she puts me through.

    And the lesson you learned from this is... da tada! NO CONTACT!

    Keep no contact,and these things won't happen... you can't trust this girl so don't give her any more ammunication against you.

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