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    hereweare's Avatar
    hereweare Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 30, 2009, 04:40 PM
    Forgetting a guy when the relationship is forbbiden
    I like this guy I work with and he likes me, but it cannot happen. If we did date then my job could be at risk and I would be the gossip between coworkers. What can I do to forget about him and move on when I write reports to him every day and see his sister every day? This makes it so difficult.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #2

    Nov 30, 2009, 05:39 PM

    Focus on something else. If you find yourself thinking about him, then distract yourself by keeping yourself as busy as possible.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #3

    Dec 1, 2009, 12:30 AM

    The two of you know enough about each other to know you like each other, so obviously there has been some contact.

    Why is it 'forbidden', and if you are both single, what is the problem of having a relationship outside the office. Why is it anybody's business.
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
    Uber Member
     
    #4

    Dec 1, 2009, 12:33 AM

    Here, here,

    The only way it would or could be forbidden is if it was your boss. Then you would have lots of issues.

    Other then that I agree with the above advice from Jake.
    Rhiannnonn's Avatar
    Rhiannnonn Posts: 62, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Dec 1, 2009, 11:09 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Jake2008 View Post
    Why is it 'forbidden', and if you are both single, what is the problem of having a relationship outside the office. Why is it anybody's business.
    She may work at a company that has it in their rules that there's no "fraternizing" with other employees, not even off the clock, and off company property. I've worked at companies that have that strange rule.
    Silver Lining's Avatar
    Silver Lining Posts: 374, Reputation: 36
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    #6

    Dec 1, 2009, 11:15 AM
    Find some other guy... :D

    Ok, seriously, if your job is at risk, take that as a motivation and quit thinking about him. Concentrate on your job. Either that or one of you find another job. Then you can start dating.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #7

    Dec 1, 2009, 11:36 AM

    Keep it strictly business, and professional. I don't know how you stop thoughts, but actions are completely in your control.

    As long as the actions are correct, the thoughts can be dealt with.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #8

    Dec 1, 2009, 12:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Rhiannnonn View Post
    She may work at a company that has it in their rules that there's no "fraternizing" with other employees, not even off the clock, and off company property. I've worked at companies that have that strange rule.
    She needs to come back and I hope she does. In her question she says, "forgetting a guy when the relationship is forbidden", yet, there has been a relationship, because they both know they like each other.

    Plus, in her question she says, " If we did date then my job could be at risk and I would be the gossip between coworkers."

    It's a little wishy washy, and she doesn't say what the company policy is.

    We'll see if she comes back with a little more information.

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