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    anxious girl's Avatar
    anxious girl Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Nov 19, 2009, 07:58 AM
    I cant leave my house without being scared
    Dear all,

    Being new to this site I am not too sure how this works but I desperately need help.
    Every day I wake up with the same fear circuling my mind and so far it o stop my succeeded to impact my life negatively. I am constantly nervous, anxious and crying with fear and I don't know how to stop myself thinking and just getting on with my life the way that I used to do before all this fear started. I know that I am thinker and worrier by nature but this is to the exteme. I can't leave my house without being scared and I can't go on like this for much longer. Each day I wake up with this overwheling sense of fear in my chest and I just can't push these pervasve thoughts out of my mind. I can't sit in a room or next to any girl for fear that I will be attracted to them ( including my best friend and my twin sister). My heart races at the thought and fills me with fear. I can't sit next to any boy for fear that I won't be attracted to them and it sca mind scares me so much. My life has become evolved around these thoughts and I don't know how much more I can't take. I'm afraid to go on dates because I'm afraid I won't be able to fancy them. I am quite shy and reserved by nature but my life has turned into constant tests ( will I be attrated to won't I be attracted to). I need help, I don't know how much more I can take.

    PLEASE help me, I really need help.

    What's wrong with me , is there something wrong with me?

    Thanks,
    anxious girl
    shatteredsoul's Avatar
    shatteredsoul Posts: 423, Reputation: 130
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    #2

    Nov 19, 2009, 08:14 AM

    Sometimes your own fears and anxieties begin to take over your mind and you stop thinking rationally. You are becoming overwhelmed with thoughts and feelings.. and you must find a way to quiet your mind. Writing is a good way to get things out, so is meditating.. yoga, talking to someone... I don't know if you draw or paint but sometimes that helps to calm the fire within. You seem like you are scared to have certain feelings and that gives them more power, try allowing yourself to feel what you feel and then you can let it go. The attraction on a physical level that you speak of is rather normal. It doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you for having thoughts.. acting on thoughts is different.
    Stop being so hard on yourself.. you are creating so much heart ache and stress for you to deal with. I know you said you were shy but maybe that is something you really don't want to be anymore and that frightens you. It seems you are reaching out and you need some connection with others. That is a good thing.
    Sometimes we have to stop the messages that we send to ourselves over and over in our head, like a broken record. You need to change the dialogue you are having with yourself. Like you are worthy, you are loved... its okay to have feelings and to express them. You have to take time to empty your mind of those negative and anxious thoughts, and try deep breathing. Focus on something positive and peaceful and try to stay there. When you feel your mind wander, bring it back to a peaceful place. You can get through this and many people struggle with anxiety and sexual thoughts.. you aren't alone and you aren't crazy so stop being so hard on yourself. You are human!
    ChildOfGod_1's Avatar
    ChildOfGod_1 Posts: 60, Reputation: 8
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Nov 21, 2009, 09:12 AM
    Step 1Distract yourself from the worry and anxiety by taking time out. Do something to help you physically relax, such as taking a walk or a bath, or sitting down and sipping a cup of herbal tea.

    Step 2Ask yourself what is the worst thing that could happen regarding the situation you are feeling fearful of. For example, if your anxiety is over going someplace you have never gone before and you are anxious over driving there alone, the worst thing that could probably happen is that you get lost.

    Step 3Decide what you would do if the worst case scenario comes about. Using the example above, think about what you would do if you got lost. You could carry a map so you can figure out where you went wrong, stop for directions, or call someone to ask them to help you find your route. Then prepare for that worst case scenario by preparing your map, charging your cell phone or doing whatever you would need to do to be prepared. Feeling prepared can help to make you feel more in control of the situation.

    Step 4Expose yourself to the fear. For example, if you feel anxious every time you drive someplace new, increase the amount of times you get into the car and drive to a new destination. The more that you face the fear, the less you feel anxiety when in that situation.

    Step 5Cut yourself some slack. Often people who experience anxiety are perfectionists. The anxiety centers around not being able to do things perfectly. Accept the fact that you are human and sometimes make mistakes. Realize your own limitations and do not expect yourself to do more than you can comfortably do. God knows that we are human beings, not angels.

    Step 6Use visualization when you are experiencing anxiety. Pick a place that you feel most relaxed and comfortable in, such as lying in bed, walking on a beach or sitting under a tree. When you feel anxiety growing, close your eyes and visualize yourself in your comfortable place until the physical signs of anxiety cease.

    Step 7Talk about your fears and anxiety to a friend or family member that you feel safe talking to. If you do not have someone in your life whom you are comfortable discussing your anxiety with, seek professional counseling to work through the anxiety. Isolation is of the devil... But friends and family are God-ordained..

    Most of all. Keep praying... I am not sure if you are Christian.. But I do this when I am scared... TC. God bless
    mrs hollow's Avatar
    mrs hollow Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #4

    Nov 23, 2009, 02:12 PM

    Nothing is going to happen to you just try and take yourself out of your comfort zone because you will never know .thats what I always get told but even now 300 miles out of my comfort zone I'm still battling with this but you don't want to let it take over completely because it will mess you up big time

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