[Unknown008]

Hi guys! I have made some research on the forum, found lots of relevant information and I think it's time for me to try to reach the core of the members' thoughts about it. :D

Ok, pornography: is it a nearly harmless entertainment because we are mature enough to decide whether to have access to it?

I know most people, especially parents towards their teens, children, see porn a real danger, a taboo if I may say so.

I found that porn relieves sexual tension and stress, and it is used as a way to stay virgin for as long as possible.

Some of the arguments I found were:
Porn is easy to get addicted to
This in turn leads to broken relationships;
Interference with work & productivity
Compulsive sexual behaviour which can lead to illness & contradicted diseases
Depression/Suicidal thoughts and behaviours
Shame and self-hatred
Guilt and loss
Legal and financial troubles

I'm inviting everyone to comment, discuss on the theme! I hope all will turn out smoothly :)

Have a great day everyone!

PS: If you just joined the discussion, try reading the previous posts before stating something. It really gets annoying if we turn in circles forever.

[excon]

Ok, pornography: is it a nearly harmless entertainment because we are mature enough to decide whether to have access to it?

Hello Unk:

There is no "we".

To MOST of us, porn is harmless entertainment. To SOME, it's a hazard to be avoided. MOST of us drink responsibly too, but there's a few who don't/can't. Same thing with driving - some abuse it - most of us don't.

So, it's not much to do about the substances we smoke, or drink, or what we read or watch on TV... It's WHO we are in relation to those things.

excon

[Unknown008]

Thanks for your answer Exy, I was thinking you might be the first poster, lol!

Yep, that's true. I was just typing the question for the debate :)

That is one of the reason why I wanted to make this thread, to have the point of view of people in general.

[redhed35]

Hey unky,

For me porn has never been an issue,in any of my relationships.

But I wondered if teenagers/young men/women who over expose themselves to soft/hard core porn have unrealistic expectations from their partners,when in a relationship.

Different age groups will have varying degrees of opinion on porn,perhaps because,younger people have not yet experienced any relationship problems from watching porn,while older people who have seen marraiges crumble because of it,will be dead against it.

There are pros and cons to almost every subject,I agree with excon in that its depends on the person, and also where that person draws the line.

[Unknown008]

Thanks Red for your answer!

Yes, I think that everything has it's 'good' and 'bad'. Abusing however always become 'bad'.

[Catsmine]

I have two interesting anecdotes for you, Unk, one pro, the other con.

Many people like myself struggle with addictive personalities. I have found that over the years my tastes in adult art have become more jaded, leading me to seek out more explicit/extreme works. This can easily be compared to the tolerance phenomena found in drug addicts. By the way, my fantasy life is under control, and my wife tolerates it.

My children were exposed to porn as infants. It was on while they were going to sleep. To this day, it knocks them out faster than a political speech.

The definition of pornography is also relevant. I have said many times that I would prefer to see people making love rather than some supernatural serial killer slashing young girls to pieces. Which do you think is more hurtful to developing psyches?

[earl237]

My opinion on porn is about the same as my feelings towards other vice/moral issues such as alcohol, gambling, cigarettes, etc. I think that child porn should remain illegal, but other porn should not be regulated by the government, adults should be free to use it if they wish and people who don't like it should choose not to watch it themselves and not judge people who do. It is up to parents to monitor what their children are doing and not leave porn accessible to children in their homes. I don't think that porn is that harmful though, when I was a kid, nearly everyone flipped though old copies of their dad's or older brother's Playboy and Penthouse magazines and it didn't turn us into criminals.

[zippit]

I think if you'r single what you do is your business but if you are married and your spouse is not "into it" as much as you,then you should cut it out completely,I feel like a husband that watches porn behind his wife's back is messing with the sanctity of the marriage.

[spitvenom]

I started looking at playboys and penthouse at 8 or 9 years old(note to dads with young sons under your bed isn't the best hiding spot) Then a friend of mine showed me a porn film when I was 10 or 11. You would think that I am probably some porn addicted freak but I am not. If anything I think looking at it that young made me get bored of it like any other kid who loses interest in something at that age. By the time I was 12 I started dating anyway. I never expected my girlfriends to act that way but I did lose my virginity very young so maybe the porn had something to do with that. But I would credit the girl I first had sex with more then the porn.

I rarely watch porn now the only time I do is if my wife is gone for business and I need to release which isn't very often.I never go to strip clubs, Never cheated on my wife or pretty much any girlfriend I had. The only thing I think it did do to me is I really like to talk dirty during sex. Nothing disrespectful or anything like that but you know what I mean.

[asking]

It depends on the porn and how it's used. Snuff films at one extreme, obviously not good. But I think there's lots of porn out there that is less extreme that still depicts women as basically useful objects, or a collection of cool sex toys, rather than as people. I think that's bad for both men and women, morally and functionally.

In principle, I'm not against porn, for the same reasons earl237 said, but the reality is that I think a lot of porn is objectionable, because it's violent or because it promotes a lack of respect for women.

Also, so *many* women come here saying that their boyfriends and husbands won't make love, preferring to wait until the woman is asleep and then go satisfy themselves with porn. At that point, it's less about objectifying women and more a chronic behavior that is damaging intimate relationships. To an extent, I think that's a sign of the individual guy's lack of self control and general immaturity--just short term thinking generally--and not directly the fault of the porn per se. Nobody is making them do that. But is it good for society to have so many men doing that? Hard to see how it is.

So to sum up, I'm conflicted about it because I'm not generally in favor of censorship, but I do think that porn has a negative effect on women overall. That said, I'm sure there are plenty of exceptions. I'm just talking about the overall picture.

[artlady]

Hi Unky!
I think as with anything else in life a good motto is "moderation in all things".

Anything to excess and that's where the trouble begins.

While some couples would say viewing porn has saved their marriage ,some would say it has ruined it.

Exploitive porn in any way ie; child pornography is always a huge no no in my book.
As is porn that is deviant in nature,people and animals ,creepy things like that.

[Alty]

Hi Unky.

I agree with the others and have to add, I can take it or leave it, porn that is.

Most porn is just too cheesy for me. I'm the girl in the room that's snickering because the acting (if you can call it that) is terrible and the music isn't fit for an elevator. Yup, I'm the buzz kill. ;)

As for magazines, it depends. I don't like the hardcore, in your face, look at my junk magazines. I like the tasteful ones, where something is left to the imagination.

I know, shocking isn't it? ;)

[shazamataz]

I've never had a problem with porn.
If my partner and I are having an "off week" but he still needs a bit of action then he will have a bit of a porn session on the computer.
Doesn't bother me at all, saves him annoying me when I'm not in the mood

Most of the time though it's a mutual thing, we watch together.
I agree with you on the cheese factor Alty, some of the movies are more comedy than sexy!
We actually have a couple of hentai (or cartoon porn) movies that we watch just for a laugh rather than to get in the mood, the translations from japanese are hilarious!

[artlady]

I've never had a problem with porn.
If my partner and i are having an "off week" but he still needs a bit of action then he will have a bit of a porn session on the computer.
Doesn't bother me at all, saves him annoying me when I'm not in the mood

Most of the time though it's a mutual thing, we watch together.
I agree with you on the cheese factor Alty, some of the movies are more comedy than sexy!
We actually have a couple of hentai (or cartoon porn) movies that we watch just for a laugh rather than to get in the mood, the translations from japanese are hilarious!

You want cheesy?
Zombie strippers from hell ,now that a real turn-on :D It's a movie by the way! Not my personal preference :rolleyes:

[Alty]

If I want to watch people, um, "make love" (I'm going to vomit) then I prefer the how too kama sutra tapes that hubby and I got.

There, I bared my soul. Go ahead, throw rocks. ;)

[artlady]

If I want to watch people, um, "make love" (I'm going to vomit) then I prefer the how too kama sutra tapes that hubby and I got.

There, I bared my soul. Go ahead, throw rocks. ;)

Are you kidding?
That's what its all about is the inner connection! I get it baby , and as often as I can :D

[Alty]

Are you kidding?
Thats what its all about is the inner connection! I get it baby , and as often as I can :D

Ditto. :cool:

Oops, this is Unky's thread. Unky is under 18! We have to keep this PG.

Unky, we get popcorn, that's what Arsty was talking about. With butter, and salt. :D

[artlady]

Ditto. :cool:

Oops, this is Unky's thread. Unky is under 18! We have to keep this PG.

Unky, we get popcorn, that's what Arsty was talking about. With butter, and salt. :D

I said love so that's a good thing to know... all we need is love Unky,that's the way to go :D

[Alty]

I said love so thats a good thing to know...all we need is love Unky,thats the way to go :D

Make love not war? :cool:

[artlady]

Do you have Halloween in Canada?
I'm really that stupid that I don't know :)