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    tmac70's Avatar
    tmac70 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 21, 2009, 12:30 PM
    Difficulty having an orgasims
    I sometimes have difficulty having an orgasm every time when I have sex. I can reach to climax but I can't get I guess you would say over the hump. LOL Its not that my boyfriend doesn't stimulate me, he is a great lover. We have tried different things such as, oral, fingering, vibrater, different positions. He is very understanding and tells me to just relax, he knows this is very frustrating for me. I know I can have orgasms, it just frustrates me that I don't have them every time. I had a hysterectomy 8yrs ago, could this possible have something to do with it? Any suggestion would be helpful. :confused:
    artlady's Avatar
    artlady Posts: 4,208, Reputation: 1477
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    #2

    Oct 21, 2009, 12:39 PM

    If you can bring yourself to orgasm by way of masturbation,than your hysterectomy has nothing to do with it.
    It is not easy for most women to orgasm during intercourse.
    Manual stimulation is what gets most woman to climax.
    Try different positions where you control your clitoral stimulation.
    You can also stimulate yourself manually when he has brought you close to orgasm.
    charleen50's Avatar
    charleen50 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Oct 21, 2009, 12:42 PM
    Are you a diabetic or on anti-depressants? Both can cause this problem. I would start at your doctors first.

    Charleen50
    tmac70's Avatar
    tmac70 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Oct 21, 2009, 01:52 PM
    No, I am not a diabetic or on anti-depressants. I do stimulate my clitoris, maybe I am over stimulating it. I don't know. Is there any technics that can help me relax, and maybe not think about if I am going to orgasm?
    artlady's Avatar
    artlady Posts: 4,208, Reputation: 1477
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    #5

    Oct 21, 2009, 02:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by tmac70 View Post
    No, I am not a diabetic or on anti-depressants. I do stimulate my clitoris, maybe I am over stimulating it. I don't know. Is there any technics that can help me relax, and maybe not think about if I am going to orgasm?
    I would just close my eyes and get into the physical sensations.Just feel the moment.
    Lose all thought and simply get lost in the feelings.
    tmac70's Avatar
    tmac70 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Oct 23, 2009, 03:54 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by artlady View Post
    I would just close my eyes and get into the physical sensations.Just feel the moment.
    Lose all thought and simply get lost in the feelings.
    I have tried that, but will keep trying. I have had them with intercourse, but not so much here lately. Thanks for the info.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #7

    Oct 23, 2009, 04:07 PM

    A woman's mind is the biggest barrier to her achieving orgasm.

    You want this so much that you're stressing yourself out over it.

    You have to stop thinking of orgasm as the goal. Just enjoy yourself, relax, have fun. I wouldn't be at all surprised if you had an orgasm once you stop obsessing about it.
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