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    kryptonightengale's Avatar
    kryptonightengale Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #41

    Mar 19, 2007, 05:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by millec
    Who can go from having sex 6 times a day to having it once every 6 months?? No one that's in a relationship and has it available to them all the time. Either he is finding the time to give it to someone else or he's not interested in women. You say he looks at internet porn all day? maybe its not the women he's looking at? Who could (or would want to) watch that much porn and not get horny from it??? He has the female available but not touching her......it's not the female he wants. Sorry.

    As of the last 3 months he does not spend as much time on the computer. He doesn't really look at porn much anymore. Every once and awhile I'll go through his recent internet history and I rarely find porn sites, mostly gaming and cheat code sites. He never was a big porn watcher. He'd look at a few pics and that was about it.
    kryptonightengale's Avatar
    kryptonightengale Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #42

    Mar 19, 2007, 05:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by chuff
    Sex may not be the most important thing, but it's pretty much nonexistent in your relationship so it's not a thing. This is huge deal to you and he doesn't seem to care so there is some kind of dynamic that isn't being explored or is ignored. If he's not gay and won't go see a doctor for you, won't go see a councelor for himself, and you continue to put up with it then I have to ask other then that you love him, what is stopping you from enjoying your life? Loving someone is great but when it's at the expense of your own happiness I don't think it is something that needs to be corrected or you get out of the situation. If he was taking steps to resolve this then I could understand you position but he doesn't seem to care. Well if he doesn't care and your passionate about this situation then why are you the one who continues to back down from it while he gets a free pass?

    He's not taking many or large steps but he is taking them. He is slowly trying to be more affectionate and caring in his own way. I'm slowly coming to grips with the fact that he doesn't want sex. It's OK, we can try to build on something else and come back to that, and as far as him going to a doctor or seeing a counselor... I don't want him to. He's the only one who knows what's bothering him and he's the only one who can deal with it and I guess I just have to be patient.
    kryptonightengale's Avatar
    kryptonightengale Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #43

    Mar 21, 2007, 03:24 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by BabyShay
    Sounds like my situation, but I think I've got you beat on this one.

    I've been dating my boyfriend for almost 5 yrs now, and he had sex wth me (2) times in 2006 and it's going on 6 months and still NO SEX.

    I'm not bragging, but I am a beautiful 29 year old who loves sex and has done many things to try to intise my boyfriend in having sex with me, but he gets mad if I put lingerie on, ask him for sex or get upset over it. If I get upset/pissed and express my feelings about him not wanting to be with me sexually, he says something like "when you act like that, I have no desire to be with you." How about the 6 months that I've been perfect and we've gotten along fine? He's NOT gay, he enjoyes going to the strip clubs, looking at internet porn, but when it comes to me, he doesn't show interest at all, it's as if I'm invisible. I try to not let it bother me, but i'm NOT 90 years old, I'm NOT ugly, I have an athletic build and love to dress sexy. If I were to stand in front of him naked, he'd tell me to move so he could see what's on the TV. It hurts, I've cried many nights over it, but learned to keep my mouth shut, if I mention the "S" word (sex) he'll get pissed & annoyed.

    I know, all you guys are going to tell me to dump him, cause he's cheating or has lost interest in me. Trust me, I've thought the same thing, but can anyone justify his actions? For all you guys, would there ever be a reason you wouldn't want to have sex with your girlfriend? Especially months on end?

    One night, I went down on him and he was clearly enjoying it. He stopped me and pulled me close to him, I thought he wanted to slow down, to avoid blowing the load too soon and perhaps wanted to have sex with me. About 30 seconds passed and he then said to me, "do you want to watch TV?"

    I went to the bathroom, cried for a moment, cleared the tears and joined him downstairs to watch TV. How normal is this?

    When someone you really care for doesn't seem interested in you it's one of the worst pains you can feel.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #44

    Mar 28, 2007, 11:06 AM
    Has he seen a doctor, not remembering if this was discussed but perhaps it's a hormonal thing.

    If he had depressed levels of testosterone it could lead to those symptoms.
    DylanReid's Avatar
    DylanReid Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #45

    Mar 28, 2007, 05:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by kryptonightengale
    I'm 20 turning 21 in about 2 weeks. My boyfriend is 25 almost 26. We've been dating for a year December 9th and moved in together about 3 months ago. When we first started dating we were having sex almost 6 times a day. He couldn't keep his hands off me. After about a month it slowed to 3 or 4 times a week. which was fine with me. Then after a bout 3 months wee we're only doing it about once every 3 weeks. Problems really started when he would only have sex with me if I really pushed and he got drunk first. We had sex on our 6 month anniversary only because I pushed for it and he got really drunk first, a full 3 months went past before we had sex a again. This time he wasn't drunk but he asked if I was happy when he finished then turned over and went to sleep. So now it's been 5 1/2 months and we've only had sex once. I keep asking him if i'm doing something wrong or if he's no longer physically attracted to me. He always tells me no, he loves me, I'm his world and that he thinks I'm beautiful. In the past he has been very sexually active, has had many girlfriends, and has admitted to me that he has cheat on almost all of his previous girlfriends with sometimes up to 3 different girls. His friends and Ex's have confirmed this. I know he's not cheating on me though. Over the last 3 years he's become very anti-social he goes to work for a few hours a day, comes home and sits infront of his computer playing games for 12- 20 hours straight then goes to bed. It's the same thing everyday. He hates clubs, doesn't like bars, or large groups of people. When I ask him why he doesn't want to have sex he always says he's not in the mood or he's tired. Even when he's had 3 days off work and all he's done is sit on his computer all day...he's still tired?!! He still looks at internet porn almost every day.I'm a very willing girl. I've tried wearing lingerie and sexy outfits and sexy notes,I'll do things in the bedroom for my guy most girls wouldn't. I get hit on :confused: allot by other guys so I guess I'm fairly attractive given most of them are just interested because I have natural 46DDD breasts, but yet my own guy isn't interested and that makes me feel very unattractive. I've told him this, he just says I'm sorry and says he'll try,but nothing ever changes. It's gotten to the point that if i even try to initiate sex or touch him below the waist he pushes my hands away and gets upset. Am I doing something wrong? What can I do to make my guy interested in me again?
    It seems as though there are an overwhelming number of females who have answered this question, which is important but it would be equally beneficiary to introduce a male perspective and an experienced one at that. Having been in several serious relationships and written on the topic of human sexuality and behavior, what your experiencing extraordinarily typical and has to do more with hormone levels than the state of your relationship . Six times a day is far beyond regular, perhaps even unhealthy. That tremendous hormonal exercise over such a prolonged period can only result in a loss of sexual ambition, which is what your experiencing now. Although it is inevitable that his libido will rise again I have found that foreplay and erotic touching (not intercourse) are an effective way to overcome this issue. Hope this was of some help if you have any further questions you'd like a professional take on just let me know.
    kryptonightengale's Avatar
    kryptonightengale Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #46

    Mar 29, 2007, 10:59 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by DylanReid
    It seems as though there are an overwhelming number of females who have answered this question, which is important but it would be equally beneficiary to introduce a male perspective and an experienced one at that. Having been in several serious relationships and written on the topic of human sexuality and behavior, what your experiencing extraordinarily typical and has to do more with hormone levels than the state of your relationship . Six times a day is far beyond regular, perhaps even unhealthy. That tremendous hormonal exercise over such a prolonged period of time can only result in a loss of sexual ambition, which is what your experiencing now. Although it is inevitable that his libido will rise again I have found that foreplay and erotic touching (not intercourse) are an effective way to overcome this issue. Hope this was of some help if you have any further questions you'd like a professional take on just let me know.

    The issue is he will not engage in foreplay or allow me to touch him.
    always_hot's Avatar
    always_hot Posts: 114, Reputation: 16
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    #47

    Mar 29, 2007, 11:26 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by kryptonightengale
    I'm 20 turning 21 in about 2 weeks. My boyfriend is 25 almost 26. We've been dating for a year December 9th and moved in together about 3 months ago. When we first started dating we were having sex almost 6 times a day. He couldn't keep his hands off me. After about a month it slowed to 3 or 4 times a week. which was fine with me. Then after a bout 3 months wee we're only doing it about once every 3 weeks. Problems really started when he would only have sex with me if I really pushed and he got drunk first. We had sex on our 6 month anniversary only because I pushed for it and he got really drunk first, a full 3 months went past before we had sex a again. This time he wasn't drunk but he asked if I was happy when he finished then turned over and went to sleep. So now it's been 5 1/2 months and we've only had sex once. I keep asking him if i'm doing something wrong or if he's no longer physically attracted to me. He always tells me no, he loves me, I'm his world and that he thinks I'm beautiful. In the past he has been very sexually active, has had many girlfriends, and has admitted to me that he has cheat on almost all of his previous girlfriends with sometimes up to 3 different girls. His friends and Ex's have confirmed this. I know he's not cheating on me though. Over the last 3 years he's become very anti-social he goes to work for a few hours a day, comes home and sits infront of his computer playing games for 12- 20 hours straight then goes to bed. It's the same thing everyday. He hates clubs, doesn't like bars, or large groups of people. When I ask him why he doesn't want to have sex he always says he's not in the mood or he's tired. Even when he's had 3 days off work and all he's done is sit on his computer all day...he's still tired?!! He still looks at internet porn almost every day.I'm a very willing girl. I've tried wearing lingerie and sexy outfits and sexy notes,I'll do things in the bedroom for my guy most girls wouldn't. I get hit on :confused: allot by other guys so I guess I'm fairly attractive given most of them are just interested because I have natural 46DDD breasts, but yet my own guy isn't interested and that makes me feel very unattractive. I've told him this, he just says I'm sorry and says he'll try,but nothing ever changes. It's gotten to the point that if i even try to initiate sex or touch him below the waist he pushes my hands away and gets upset. Am I doing something wrong? What can I do to make my guy interested in me again?
    He could be in the closet. I did some research on why a man may not want sex and being gay was one of the things. Along with stress and some medications. I can't remember the 4th reason. Could he be cheating?
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #48

    Mar 29, 2007, 12:43 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by always_hot
    HE COULD BE IN THE CLOSET. I DID SOME RESEARCH ON WHY A MAN MAY NOT WANT SEX AND BEING GAY WAS ONE OF THE THINGS. ALONG WITH STRESS AND SOME MEDICATIONS. I can't REMEMBER THE 4TH REASON. COULD HE BE CHEATING?
    5th reason could be depressed testosterone production for any number of reasons.
    ncgirl_21's Avatar
    ncgirl_21 Posts: 79, Reputation: 6
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    #49

    Mar 29, 2007, 12:45 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by always_hot
    HE COULD BE IN THE CLOSET. I DID SOME RESEARCH ON WHY A MAN MAY NOT WANT SEX AND BEING GAY WAS ONE OF THE THINGS. ALONG WITH STRESS AND SOME MEDICATIONS. I can't REMEMBER THE 4TH REASON. COULD HE BE CHEATING?

    Please read the post before answering if you had read it you would know that all these things have been discussed and no hes not gay, and he not cheating.
    texxxas's Avatar
    texxxas Posts: 29, Reputation: 4
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    #50

    Mar 29, 2007, 01:46 PM
    He's gay...
    herringelizabeth's Avatar
    herringelizabeth Posts: 17, Reputation: -5
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    #51

    Mar 31, 2007, 04:20 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by kryptonightengale
    I'm 20 turning 21 in about 2 weeks. My boyfriend is 25 almost 26. We've been dating for a year December 9th and moved in together about 3 months ago. When we first started dating we were having sex almost 6 times a day. He couldn't keep his hands off me. After about a month it slowed to 3 or 4 times a week. which was fine with me. Then after a bout 3 months wee we're only doing it about once every 3 weeks. Problems really started when he would only have sex with me if I really pushed and he got drunk first. We had sex on our 6 month anniversary only because I pushed for it and he got really drunk first, a full 3 months went past before we had sex a again. This time he wasn't drunk but he asked if I was happy when he finished then turned over and went to sleep. So now it's been 5 1/2 months and we've only had sex once. I keep asking him if i'm doing something wrong or if he's no longer physically attracted to me. He always tells me no, he loves me, I'm his world and that he thinks I'm beautiful. In the past he has been very sexually active, has had many girlfriends, and has admitted to me that he has cheat on almost all of his previous girlfriends with sometimes up to 3 different girls. His friends and Ex's have confirmed this. I know he's not cheating on me though. Over the last 3 years he's become very anti-social he goes to work for a few hours a day, comes home and sits infront of his computer playing games for 12- 20 hours straight then goes to bed. It's the same thing everyday. He hates clubs, doesn't like bars, or large groups of people. When I ask him why he doesn't want to have sex he always says he's not in the mood or he's tired. Even when he's had 3 days off work and all he's done is sit on his computer all day...he's still tired?!! He still looks at internet porn almost every day.I'm a very willing girl. I've tried wearing lingerie and sexy outfits and sexy notes,I'll do things in the bedroom for my guy most girls wouldn't. I get hit on :confused: allot by other guys so I guess I'm fairly attractive given most of them are just interested because I have natural 46DDD breasts, but yet my own guy isn't interested and that makes me feel very unattractive. I've told him this, he just says I'm sorry and says he'll try,but nothing ever changes. It's gotten to the point that if i even try to initiate sex or touch him below the waist he pushes my hands away and gets upset. Am I doing something wrong? What can I do to make my guy interested in me again?
    So I guess you like to have sex. I have had sex,and I like too. Well, anyway he's probobaly cheating on u.and tired because he's been touching that girls body. My name is Romeo and always try too touch my girlfriends body.and just brokeup with her.
    kryptonightengale's Avatar
    kryptonightengale Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #52

    Mar 31, 2007, 05:44 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by herringelizabeth
    so i guess u like to have sex. i have had sex,and i like too. well, anyways hes probobaly cheating on u.and tired because hes been touching that girls body. my name is Romeo and always try too touch my girlfriends body.and just brokeup with her.

    Thank you this did not help in any way. He is not cheating because he rarely leaves the house. I know the signs of a guy cheating because it's happened to me several times in the past.
    kryptonightengale's Avatar
    kryptonightengale Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #53

    Mar 31, 2007, 05:46 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by texxxas
    he's gay....

    He is not gay. He has admitted that he has been feeling depressed and he just isn't as into sex as he was when he was younger.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
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    #54

    Mar 31, 2007, 06:55 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by herringelizabeth
    so i guess u like to have sex. i have had sex,and i like too. well, anyways hes probobaly cheating on u.and tired because hes been touching that girls body. my name is Romeo and always try too touch my girlfriends body.and just brokeup with her.
    Is your name really Romeo?
    haylz-p's Avatar
    haylz-p Posts: 13, Reputation: 2
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    #55

    Apr 2, 2007, 08:06 PM
    Yer darling I think its time to get rid of him... I know it may sound like he's not cheating on you but are you sure? Most guys love having sex... its just weird... mayb he's all sexd out haha..! I'm joking... find a new guy that will love you for who you are... your a very pretty lady and I think many guys would be interested in having a relationship with you...
    aracelis0104's Avatar
    aracelis0104 Posts: 4, Reputation: 2
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    #56

    Apr 3, 2007, 09:25 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by kryptonightengale
    I'm 20 turning 21 in about 2 weeks. My boyfriend is 25 almost 26. We've been dating for a year December 9th and moved in together about 3 months ago. When we first started dating we were having sex almost 6 times a day. He couldn't keep his hands off me. After about a month it slowed to 3 or 4 times a week. which was fine with me. Then after a bout 3 months wee we're only doing it about once every 3 weeks. Problems really started when he would only have sex with me if I really pushed and he got drunk first. We had sex on our 6 month anniversary only because I pushed for it and he got really drunk first, a full 3 months went past before we had sex a again. This time he wasn't drunk but he asked if I was happy when he finished then turned over and went to sleep. So now it's been 5 1/2 months and we've only had sex once. I keep asking him if i'm doing something wrong or if he's no longer physically attracted to me. He always tells me no, he loves me, I'm his world and that he thinks I'm beautiful. In the past he has been very sexually active, has had many girlfriends, and has admitted to me that he has cheat on almost all of his previous girlfriends with sometimes up to 3 different girls. His friends and Ex's have confirmed this. I know he's not cheating on me though. Over the last 3 years he's become very anti-social he goes to work for a few hours a day, comes home and sits infront of his computer playing games for 12- 20 hours straight then goes to bed. It's the same thing everyday. He hates clubs, doesn't like bars, or large groups of people. When I ask him why he doesn't want to have sex he always says he's not in the mood or he's tired. Even when he's had 3 days off work and all he's done is sit on his computer all day...he's still tired?!! He still looks at internet porn almost every day.I'm a very willing girl. I've tried wearing lingerie and sexy outfits and sexy notes,I'll do things in the bedroom for my guy most girls wouldn't. I get hit on :confused: allot by other guys so I guess I'm fairly attractive given most of them are just interested because I have natural 46DDD breasts, but yet my own guy isn't interested and that makes me feel very unattractive. I've told him this, he just says I'm sorry and says he'll try,but nothing ever changes. It's gotten to the point that if i even try to initiate sex or touch him below the waist he pushes my hands away and gets upset. Am I doing something wrong? What can I do to make my guy interested in me again?
    Don't feel alone I have tha same problem, Me and my boyfriend live together, have a baby and been together for 5 years and he is always too tired to have sex and when I try to touch him he gets very upset. I fell the same way very unatracted. I don't know what to do because I been very sexually active and he doesn't understand that a woman has needs. HEEEEEELLLPPPP
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #57

    Apr 3, 2007, 01:07 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by aracelis0104
    Don't feel alone I have tha same problem, Me and my boyfriend live toghether, have a baby and been toghether for 5 years and he is always too tired to have sex and when i try to touch him he gets very upset. I fell the same way very unatracted. I don't know what to do because I been very sexually active and he doesn't understand that a woman has needs. HEEEEEELLLPPPP

    Something going on there, Tired or not a guy has needs as well. And at that age there is a bigger hormonal drive as well. He should talk to a doctor, something isn't right if he's not knocking the bottom out of someone else which is a different problem in itself.
    dazey's Avatar
    dazey Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #58

    May 24, 2007, 08:55 AM
    Have you condsidered the idea of an online affair? My boyfriend was hooked on world of warcraft and would stay up all night long playing it. Eventually he would wait up until I woke up before he would go to bed. During this time he avoided me as much as possible, and stopped touching me at all. At first I took it really hard and figured it was something to do with me. But eventually I discovered he had met a girl on the game and was having cyber sex with her... if he is spending a lot of time alone on the computer, this may be a concern...
    MicheleEB's Avatar
    MicheleEB Posts: 58, Reputation: 4
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    #59

    May 25, 2007, 08:49 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by letmetellu
    Girl pack up all of your things and move somewhere. If all of this happened in such a short time, it will not be long till he does not even want you around. He is a cheater and this is just the first stage of changing sex partners for him. You know he is a cheater. He has admitted it and his friends have confirmed it and he probably cheated on someone to be with you. Find you a guy that will love your 46 DDD and make you an important part of his life.

    I dated this guy too. And he tried to blame the fact that we never had sex, on me. Get out now.
    MicheleEB's Avatar
    MicheleEB Posts: 58, Reputation: 4
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    #60

    May 25, 2007, 08:50 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by kryptonightengale
    He is not gay. He has admitted that he has been feeling depressed and he just isn't as into sex as he was when he was younger.

    When he was younger haha... to be 25 again!

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