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Melgenser · Oct 12, 2009, 02:54 PM

I became close with a foster baby recently - he was being neglected at the foster home he was living at and I took him in. The foster mom had no problem with it as long as she kept the check every month. I never took a penny for keeping the baby. When he was 12 months old he was giving back to his bio mom. When he was 18 months old he ended up back in the system with his 3 yo sister and a newborn addicted to crack.

In the meantime, the social workers will not allow me to see any of the kids because they can't establish a relationship via a paper trail. And the mother - who is still addicted to crack - will not admit that she knows me (I took the baby to court appointed visits).

How does a mother who has lost 9 children to the system still have parental rights. How do I allow the social workers to allow me to see these children again?
How do you rehab a mother who has lost 9 children - all born addicted to crack - rather than put her in jail?

Who do I call - what can I do. I've been in touch with the Ombudsman - but no one seems to care about the children - their best interest is never in question.

Please help!

Melgenser · Oct 12, 2009, 03:01 PM

I became close with a foster baby recently - he was being neglected at the foster home he was living at and I took him in. The foster mom had no problem with it as long as she kept the check every month. I never took a penny for keeping the baby. When he was 12 months old he was giving back to his bio mom. When he was 18 months old he ended up back in the system with his 3 yo sister and a newborn addicted to crack.

In the meantime, the social workers will not allow me to see any of the kids because they can't establish a relationship via a paper trail. And the mother - who is still addicted to crack - will not admit that she knows me (I took the baby to court appointed visits).

How does a mother who has lost 9 children to the system still have parental rights. How do I allow the social workers to allow me to see these children again?
How do you rehab a mother who has lost 9 children - all born addicted to crack - rather than put her in jail?

Who do I call - what can I do. I've been in touch with the Ombudsman - but no one seems to care about the children - their best interest is never in question.

Please help!

ScottGem · Oct 12, 2009, 03:16 PM

You have to be approved to either foster or adopt the children.

Melgenser · Oct 12, 2009, 04:29 PM

I am approved. I always was. But I never took money for respite so the county is saying there is lack of proof that I really knew the children.

ScottGem · Oct 12, 2009, 04:29 PM

That's understandable, but if you are approved why don't you just request to foster them?

Fr_Chuck · Oct 12, 2009, 06:26 PM

First you made the first mistake by taking them in without some form of documents.

And where is the father, since he also has rights.

And how does the "mother" know you, I thought you were watching the child for the foster mom? So won't she say you watched the child ?

But rights of a parent are not easily taken away, as long as there is hope they will change their life.

Melgenser · Oct 12, 2009, 10:27 PM

The father is back in rehab again - second time in one year. The mom is in rehab again as well - not jail - she should be in jail. Birthing 9 crack babies should be a crime. The mom wants her kids back - she denies ever knowing us. I would like to just adopt the kids. The social workers won't let us visit and they won't place the children in my licensed home because they can't establish a relationship according to the crack addicted mother. You would think the social workers would want the kids to be with someone they know - to have some sort of stability in their life.

Someone has to pass a law that after you lose like 3 drug addicted children to the system, you lose your chances to get them back. The babies should be adopted out while they're young and a nice family still wants them. Research has proved that they all pretty much end up back in the system over and over and over.

stinawords · Oct 12, 2009, 10:57 PM

The problem is that she didn't lose them. They were temporarily taken... if they were truly lost to the system she wouldn't have rights to them anymore. Yes, it is a rough thing to have to watch but it has to do with everyone's rights even the crack w@#$%s.