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h0llister · Sep 24, 2009, 06:13 PM

Hello everyone and thank for you reading.

I have been dating a guy for 3years were both 20years old. I used to get really really jealous of everything he did. Like go out with guyfriends, being around girls.. etc.. I have been able to get my jealously under control now. But my boyfriend still thinks I am. If he's going out with the guys for a night, even if I ask where? Or with who? He gets like OMGGG why are you so jealous.. which I'm not I'm just wondering to make conversation or whatever. But from him doing this all the I feel my jealously coming back. I don't no what to do to make him believe me.

Sometimes though I do get jealous though because his university his classes are 95% girls and they always have exclusive class parties where only class members are allowed.. so I get jealous because its all girls.. Like tonight he has one of the parties. Should I always hide my jealousy now? Because he thinks I am jealous 24/7 anyway... what do you guys think?

I wish · Sep 24, 2009, 06:28 PM

Sounds like you're a very insecure person and you've recognized it, so that's a first step.

It sounds like a very serious problem and might require professional help. I suggest that you see a counsellor or a therapist on a regular basis to help you uncover the roots of your problems.

You need to take care of yourself before you worry about your boyfriend.

h0llister · Sep 24, 2009, 06:29 PM

Originally Posted by I wish

Sounds like you're a very insecure person and you've recognized it, so that's a first step.

It sounds like a very serious problem and might require professional help. I suggest that you see a counsellor or a therapist on a regular basis to help you uncover the roots of your problems.

You need to take care of yourself before you worry about your boyfriend.

I can't afford a consellor, :(

That's why I have come here

I wish · Sep 24, 2009, 06:31 PM

Try reading these books:
The Guide to Self-Help Books – Recommended Self-Help Books - Self-Help Book Reviews
Amazon.com: Self-Help Books: Personal Transformation, Motivational, Success, Stress Management, Happiness, Self-Esteem

I'm sure you can borrow them from the library. You need to take steps to build your self-esteem and self-confidence.

h0llister · Sep 24, 2009, 06:34 PM

Thank you I will check them out

Romefalls19 · Sep 25, 2009, 04:27 AM

There are other options, you can talk to a counselor which is free. A church is also another place where you can go and talk to someone for free. Books are a great source, I had to use books and a therapist just to get mine down from what it used to be.

Don't think you will ever be cured of this, it's an uphill battle all the time. The mountain is always muddy and you will find yourself slipping a lot, especially in the beginning but it will decrease

unaffected · Sep 25, 2009, 06:58 AM

I have found myself jealous in certain relationships, but not all of them. I realize jealousy is something that you have to work on, but I wonder if his actions are helping you to be this way?

My ex worked in the racing industry, and would travel every weekend. He was surrounded by girls in skimpy clothes, and would seldom call me during these trips. I became a very jealous person.

But, I met my husband. And I trust him more than I've ever trusted anyone, ever. And I am no longer jealous.

I'm not sure this helps at all, just my two cents :)