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Alice123 · Sep 6, 2009, 01:57 AM

Hi,

How to build confidence? How to present ourself in front of others? I want to look and feel confident and present a good body language. Please help.

redhed35 · Sep 6, 2009, 02:11 AM

Confidence comes from within,and it takes time to build it..
There are many books on the market,but if this is for something special,here are a few tips to get you through.

1. sleep well the night before,and drink plenty of water.

2. decide on what your going to wear,be comfortable,classic sexy is usually a good way to go in most situations.
Example.. a pencil skirt,blouse/top and shoes with a heel.

3. hair and makeup,not too much.

4. in your mind repeat to yourself,I am a strong confident woman,I am beautiful and smart.

5. walk with a purpose.straight,and as if you are going somewhere important,even if its only to the toilet.
Don't run,or walk fast.

6. if your giving a presentation... know your materal well and arrive in plenty of time.

7. give a firm handshake and good eye contact.

8.in a social setting ,listen to people,even if your shy,people love to tell their stories.
Ask questions.

9.. smile smile smile.

Jake2008 · Sep 6, 2009, 03:08 AM

You might want to practice too. Get yourself ready like Red said- hair, makeup, clothes. Then look that person in the eye in the mirror, and talk to her like you've never seen her before.

Just light stuff like "Hi, I'm Cindy, how are you", with a handshake and a smile. If you see what you look like, you will have a little more confidence because you know people will see the same thing.

Don't cross your arms, and when you're asked a question, just give a simple answer until you are more sure of yourself, and you are more familiar with the type of people you are talking to.

Don't hunch over, and watch for nervous behaviour like rubbing your hands, scratching your head, or adjusting your hair etc.

Move around the room, and introduce yourself as you gain more confidence. There will also be others there that are not particularly comfortable in a room full of strangers either.

You'll be fine.

SelfImprovement · Sep 6, 2009, 09:45 AM

Hi,

As redhed35 said - confidence comes from within, and it takes time to build it. But it is entirely doable, with a little bit of practice. Here are few ideas for gaining self confidence:

1. It all starts in the mind. If you want to look and feel confident, and present a good body language before others, practice doing that in your imagination first. The key to self confidence is to practice facing your fears, and react aggressively to your fears, in your imagination first. See yourself doing that, in your mind first. And make a habit of doing that in your mind, until you are completely comfortable with that thought.

2. Once you are comfortable with the idea of "being confident" in your mind, you can move on to projecting that image in real world. The trick for that - Just do It! And act as if it were impossible to fail. Just go out there, pretend that you are confident, and give it your best shot - like you know how to. You may make a false step or two initially, but don't let that deter you. Do it again. And keep doing it. In other words, just fake it till you make it. And before long, you will make it.

You can find lot more information about self confidence at:
http://www.self-improvement-advice.o...onfidence.html

Hope this info helps.

I wish · Sep 8, 2009, 09:15 AM

1) Taking public speaking courses

2) Read self-help books

3) Get tips from people close to you, who have the type of confidence that you are looking for

4) Consider at least some, if not all the great suggestions offered by these people on AMHD.

Clough · Sep 8, 2009, 11:30 PM

Hi, Alice123!

You've received some really excellent answers here! Is there a particular thing that you're needing to do in front of others for which you would like to appear confident, please?

As examples, there can be big differences in how a person appears when giving a presentation or leading others as compared to sitting around in a group and sharing casual information.

Thanks!

Alice123 · Sep 9, 2009, 07:29 AM

Thanks all for your answers.

Actually, I think a lot and I am v conscious about my appearance and my image. I always want to be on safe side, which I don't think is right. Whatever is the situation, I always think what others will think of me. I don't want to hurt anybody. I'm v polite to others. But, sometimes in spite of being correct, I'm misunderstood by others. Help.

redhed35 · Sep 9, 2009, 07:35 AM

Sometimes people who are shy come off as aloof..

Practice in front of a mirror,say things out loud,how do they sound to your ears?

The next time your going shopping ask the assistant for help.some shops have personnal shoppers at no extra cost.

Learn about body langauge,get a book!
Be conscious about your body until you get used to the change.

Could I ask what age you are?

Alice123 · Sep 9, 2009, 08:03 AM

M in my early 20ies...

Clough · Sep 10, 2009, 12:42 AM

Hi again, Alice123!

Do you think there are any groups that meet around where you live where people with a similar issue that you have can meet and give each other feedback on how each person is presenting themselves? I would think that some hospitals might have groups like that.

Some types of groups like that might even be free to attend.

Thanks!