[unaffected]

My husband and I have been "casually" trying to get pregnant for a little over 2 years. By "casually" I mean that we haven't been not trying, but we haven't been crazy about it either. There were some months that I looked up my ovulation calendar stuff, and we had sex more during those days. But normally, we have sex probably 5 times a week, if not more, so most months we were bound to have had sex during my ovulation time.

I started to get worried, so we both went and had tests done, and both of us are "normal" when it comes to childbearing. His sperm count and all that is great, and everything is fine and OK with me.

Now what? Everything I've read says if after 1 year you haven't conceived, go to a doctor. But it's been 2 years AND the tests came back OK.

What can I do? I scheduled an appointment with a reproductive center, but I'm not sure that's what I should do if neither of us actually has any infertility issues.

[LearningAsIGo]

Sometimes being "casual" makes all the difference. We actively tried for 18 months before we had a successful pregnancy and we have no fertility issues, plus I was doing lots of "extras" like monitoring my ovualtion, and taking progesterone (Dr. prescribed).

The ovulation calendars you are referring to are giving you false information. They are based on a "general" cycle, which most women do not experience month after month.

Using OPK's (Ovulation prediction kits) is any easy way to look for your actual fertile time. To go beyond that, check out "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni Weschler. It outlines how to monitor your cycle for the most fertile time. Once I learned to recognize signs, I found that I could ovulate any time between day 9 - 16 each month.

In the end, conception is a very complicated process and it's a miracle any one of us gets pregnant. Tiny microscopic sperm has to find a microscopic egg... cervical fluid must be of "fertile quality"... timing has to be just right... and many other factors... sometimes it just takes time. Going to a reproductive clinic will give you some good information as well. :)

Good luck!

[unaffected]

Good luck!

Thank you for your informative answer. I was looking at some informative websites, but there were so many acronyms for things, I was completely lost after looking at two forum threads.

The OPKs that you speak of, are those the ones I could buy at WalMart or Target? I have seen what I imagine to be them near the pregnancy tests and things, I believe.

[LearningAsIGo]

I believe you could find them at stores like that, or pharmacies near the pregnancy tests.

I used an Internet site that had some great pricing. Early-pregnancy-tests dot com
I bought them cheap but had accurate results - I preferred to have a lot so I could test frequently ;)

[sunshinewoman]

My sister didn't get pregnant for 3 years and then she finally got a pos test. Conceiving is more difficult than you think. Look into different types of foods you eat to boost fertility. A couple of my friends took red clover, which is said to improve your mucus lining for optimal implantation . That websit: earlypregnancy dot com, also have fertility boosting teas that are said to be great. I know it sounds far fetched, but my sister was willing to try anything. And you know what? She got pregnant after going in for acupuntor. We think its because she was finally relaxed. Just try and have fun with it, even if you're being casual.
Good luck

[ttara81]

Just a word of encouragement for you... my husband and I finally conceived just a couple of weeks after celebrating our 9yr anniversary. The only thing we did was pray. I prayed and prayed and finally God answered. In reflection, I realized that things don't and will not always happen when you want them to. My husband and I discussed fertility options but I felt that if it was meant to be, it would be. In my opinion, I felt that using fertility drugs or things of that nature was only going outside of God's will and putting our trust into medications and not in Him. Finally when I put it into God's hands, it happened! I am now 9 months pregnant with a baby boy and we couldn't be happier. I hope this gives you a little bit of encouragement. I never believed people when they used to tell me that "it'll happen when the time's right"... I just thought they were trying to make me feel better, but it's very true! Take your time and pray about it!

Good luck to you!

[DoulaLC]

It's good that you are going to the reproductive center. There will likely be tests still to do that you didn't have done the first time around with your doctor. Generally just the initial testing is done, but there are a number of variables that go into becoming pregnant.

As has been said, it may just be a matter of time. Hope it doesn't take too much longer for you!

[jane1988]

We where actively trying to conceive for 4months until my friend told me about opk's first month using them I got pregnant as I was ovulating over a week after the ovulation calculator had said I was. You can get opks from eBay I think its 20 tests for £2 so very cheap and easy to use.
Good luck hope you get a positive result soon

[Alty]

Thank you for your informative answer. I was looking at some informative websites, but there were so many acronyms for things, I was completely lost after looking at two forum threads.

The OPKs that you speak of, are those the ones I could buy at WalMart or Target? I have seen what I imagine to be them near the pregnancy tests and things, I believe.

Yes, you can buy them at Walmart.

A friend of mine tried for 1 year with her first, the second she used an ovulation kit, got pregnant the first try.

Not that this is normal, but it does help predict when you're ovulating. :)

Good luck.

[unaffected]

I used the ovulation kit this past month, and I was a bit disappointed with the brand or maybe even the instructions. My "LH Surge" line was never as dark as they said it should be, then the next thing I know, it's gone! So I didn't take full advantage of my best days... Oh well, at least I know what to look for next month!

[rnrg]

Stress plays a big part in being unable to become pregnant. Enjoy the time with your husband and "don't set aside a time to try", just let it happen. I know that is hard to do, but our bodies can be finicky like a cat.

Don't compare your "waiting and trying" with everyone else's. It can cause more stress and worry. Have a healthy and positive outlook and don't envy others that are pregnant around you (you did not hint at this, I was pointing out what a lot of us think when everyone around us is pregnant except for us). This will help create a "fertile" soil, so to speak. Yes, there are things on the market that may help. Read to be informed, but not to be discouraged.

You are still young and have plenty of time. You will get pregnant when and if you are suppose to! Rita

[LearningAsIGo]

I used the ovulation kit this past month, and I was a bit disappointed with the brand or maybe even the instructions. My "LH Surge" line was never as dark as they said it should be, then the next thing I know, it's gone! So I didn't take full advantage of my best days... Oh well, at least I know what to look for next month!

A piece of advice with OPKs and the LH line:

OPKs are designed to detect a certain amount of LH. That being said, some women naturally ovulate at a lower level, making their OPKs appear "negative" while others spike a higher level of LH, even when they are not fertile--making their OPKs appear "positive".

My experience was similar to yours -- my line RARELY got darker than the control line, but I knew I was indeed ovulating each month because I was charting temps and cervical mucus.

The month I conceived, my line was dark for a day or two, but not nearly as dark as the control line.

As long as you see a line, have sex like crazy! :D That will help you time intercourse before and after ovulation which is prime time ;)

[unaffected]

As long as you see a line, have sex like crazy! :D That will help you time intercourse before and after ovulation which is prime time ;)

That made me smile, and thank you for the great advice! Very helpful!!