[CFZD]

I am not an emtional person, and I have always focused on work instead of meeting men. After missing many signals from guys - I was told by my gfs, should I take this as a signal or leave it like I have always done previously? ( it might be a normal question that he asked, I don't want to over analyze it)

Here is the story:

My guy friend asked me this question before I moved abroad for a project... - what if you met the guy you dream of in XXX country, will you come back? I was a bit surprised when he asked this question, b.c. no other person has ever asked about this.

Why would a guy ask a girl this question?:confused:

P.S. Our friendship is pure and we get along very well, always support each other on decision makings, we are always in a very professional way when communicate. He also keeps in touch after I left ( he initiated all conversations by email).

[N0help4u]

Do you plan on staying in that country or going back?
Keep in touch with him and maybe when you are ready to go back jokingly email that you would love to come back if there were a guy of your dreams that was looking forward to your return or something like that. Then see how he replies

[I wish]

How do you feel about this guy?

Do you really just see him as a regular friend? Do you think that there is as potential?

Just answer him honestly. He asked a direct question. I don't see any reason to play mind games.

[liz28]

I know when my friend went on a vacation to Greece for 2 weeks I told her "don't go there falling in love with a guy and stay there".

Maybe he meant something by or it maybe he didn't but the only person who knows is him.

He could value your friendship and don't want to lose you as a friend by having the distance between the two of you. Or he could be asking for other reason--aka he likes you more than a friend.

[CFZD]

We met at a one-week seminar, he took me out the whole week straight and have been in contacting with me since then. He was very respectful the whole time while we were hanging out, I didn't know if those were dates or not, he was really shy. I assumed he was just enjoying talking to me, which I have been a supporter to his decision makings as well!

I am coming back to the US after a few months, I told him and I answered his question that I just go to XXX country for work, not thinking about meeting someone. He laughed. What does that mean?

[Chey5782]

Well first of all, are you interested in him? If you are then tell him, that will solve your wondering if he's interested.

It sounds as though this is a genuine mutual friendship, which is nice to have. Maybe you should just ask him sometime if that's what he meant, in as tactful a way as possible.

[zippit]

I think he was relieved by your words and that's why he laughed

[I wish]

I am coming back to the US after a few months, I told him and I answered his question that I just go to XXX country for work, not thinking about meeting someone. He laughed. What does that mean??

Don't need to read too much into it. But it sounds like he's happy to hear what you said.

If you are interested in him, just keep talking to him. But wait until you're back in the same town before you commit too much because long distance can be really tough.

[CFZD]

But he does not live in the same state as I am in the US. I don't understand why he always initiates all conversations while we don't even live near. He said we get along very well and any man would be happy to spend time with me, I am a great combo etc.

I think he is special and has great potential to be more than a friend! :) but again he lives far away. :(

[I wish]

It doesn't matter what he says. That's just how HE feels.

But you still haven't really answered our question. How do YOU feel about him?

[CFZD]

I am certainly interested in him!

[I wish]

Finally!

So if that's how you feel. Just keep talking to him. You don't need to over-analyze everything he says. If one day you see each other in person, then you can take the next step. But until then, just keep getting to know him better and enjoy the conversations that you have together.

[CFZD]

Yes, thanks for the words, that's exactly what I need!

We have been talking to each other for one year now... sometimes I wish he could just say what he really feels, but I will wait... and take it light hearted.:)

[zippit]

He might be holding a lot back for WHEN you
Get face to face,I know I would.

[CFZD]

He told me that he has difficulties to express interest towards females. LOL

Same with me...

Maybe both of us are engineers, we are pretty bad at flirting... ya know ;)

[Chey5782]

If you feel that shy write him a little note that has an obvious (even to you hehe) tone of flirtation and see if he gets the hint. People can be so dense, I told a guy I dated once that I liked him by informing him we should probably make out, right then. The look on his face was quite worth it, and we both laughed.

[CFZD]

Chey:
Oh we do that to each other sometimes... but we still don't get it... or not certain about whether we like each other more than friends.
Generally speaking both of us are assertive, direct people, however when things come to dating there's a hell lot of experience we are lacking. We were talking briefly yesterday, he was talking about his MBA classes and I was talking about my language classes, nerds eh? He mentioned he was thinking about me, that haven't talked to me for a while, I said the same thing, then silence for 5 seconds... changed topic to academic again... :|

Now, don't laugh! :D

LOL

[Chey5782]

Naw, I get it. I've always been one of those weird girls who dates nerds because smart is sexy to me. I literally get spine tingles when men use big words that my mom wouldn't understand. Explain the newest theory on dark matter to me and I am yours. *shrug*

Do you think he would respond well if you told him, "I was thinking about this and wanted your opinion, should we should consider dating?" It would give him the option to reply in a more logical frame of mind, if he blushed and looked interested you could seize the opportunity to inform him that you had already considered it and decided that dinner on Friday would be lovely. I am a firm believer in laughter as a tool for communication with ease.

Can I laugh now?

[CFZD]

Naw, I get it. I've always been one of those weird girls who dates nerds because smart is sexy to me. I literally get spine tingles when men use big words that my mom wouldn't understand. Explain the newest theory on dark matter to me and I am yours. *shrug*

Do you think he would respond well if you told him, "I was thinking about this and wanted your opinion, should we should consider dating?" It would give him the option to reply in a more logical frame of mind, if he blushed and looked interested you could seize the opportunity to inform him that you had already considered it and decided that dinner on Friday would be lovely. I am a firm believer in laughter as a tool for communication with ease.

Can I laugh now?

He doesn't live close to me, we discussed once about long distance relationship, I told him about people/friends we both know that were doing long distance. He said it is no reason to do it if both can't hang out regularly( he is talking in general not us). Then he said - "seems like you don't agree with me." I said "it depends on individuals, some of them can handle it." Then he asked" so what's the difference between us and Adam with Alice (who are in long distance relationship)?" I joked " the difference is that they were both from the south, but we are from North and West!" Then he laughed...

Ok, now can you guys explain what he means... lol

Chey, you may laugh. :D

[Chey5782]

Oh my god. You really are dense woman! He was comparing you to an actual dating relationship. Are you sure he's not already your boyfriend and you just don't know it yet? THAT would be a funny question to ask him next time he makes a comment like that.