[Kate Bane]

I am married 34 years. I gave up my high earning job that involved travel to raer my two daughters and manage the daily operations of my husbands business. My husband sulked when I considered going back to a request to work part time. I put my hear and soul into raering the girls and developing his business. He does not value any work I done or do. Over the years he raerly was home to have dinner with us, always working long hours mostly due to bad time management and being unorganised. He could get home early for his card games that often went on until 2 am or night class but raerly suggested we go out together, I was always the one to suggest that. I was always last on his list. We had many arguments over the years due to him being late and not available and many nights I cried myself to sleep. He shuts me out and does not discuss any issues we have saying I have nothing to say, leave me alone you are just ing.
Recently he has become very angry and abusive toward me. I ddscoverd he is gambling not;much approx 15 euro a day. He is a bad sleeper and has sleept in the spare room the last 9 months, he slept there for 4 years 7 years ago while I was studying, he did not support me while in college. I was so proud of my achievement at graduation, he came along but did not even say well done or congratulations.
We raerly eat together and when we do he just stares out the window and has nothing to say. He complicates every situation possible, we renovated our home and it was hassle all the way, doing work that we could not afford, disagreeing with everything I did. I got so stressed last Winter after one of his rages that I could sleep... it was hell and he was totally oblivious to the situation.
I am trying to get the strength to leave him but am scared as to how I will manage financailly despite the fact that he had no money when we got married and lost his job soon after we were married and I fully supported him in developing his contracting business.
Any advise on how to get out, he thinks I will never leave as I have often said I cannot live like this and I cannot it is wearing me down.

[N0help4u]

Many guys are not good with showing their emotions and stuff but you sound like you have it really bad.
Have you thought about going back to work.
Maybe some time at work will make a difference for you because you will have something outside the home to work at.

Only you can know when it is to the point you can't take any more and leave. Some people manage to stay together and live separate lives. I guess what you need is to weigh all the options as well as all the pros and cons.

[chuff]

I think the best thing to do is get out and worry about the rest later. We often start thinking about everything that can go wrong and do nothing at all. The first step is just leaving and gettting away from this.