Why no sex

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 10:28 AM

Threads merged

Why do married women after the birth of there child don't want to have sex?

Do the men who have an affair love the mistress?

JudyKayTee · Jul 18, 2009, 10:32 AM

This is like asking if "people like vanilla ice cream." Some do, some don't.

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 10:38 AM

Yes it is related, I am the mistress

N0help4u · Jul 18, 2009, 11:22 AM

Yeah about the 160th time I hit submit and lost it due to transition :(

Anyway
Even if he does love you he is committed to his wife and not expecting you to grow feelings for him. Most likely he would pick his wife over you.
You are an escape for him to take a break from his real world. He goes back

JudyKayTee · Jul 18, 2009, 11:26 AM

Originally Posted by Marlie

Yes it is related, I am the mistress

So your boyfriend is married but says his wife doesn't have sex with him any longer since their child was born and you want to know if he loves you?

As far as the whether he loves you part, ask him.

As far as the he doesn't have sex with his wife any longer part - if I had a nickel for every time I heard THAT line... I'd have a lot of nickels.

My suggestion - have some respect for yourself and find a single man.

N0help4u · Jul 18, 2009, 11:28 AM

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

As far as the he doesn't have sex with his wife any longer part - if I had a nickel for every time I head THAT line ... I'd have a lot of nickels.

.

Ain't that the truth!!

Chey5782 · Jul 18, 2009, 11:43 AM

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

My suggestion - have some respect for yourself and find a single man.

Exactly! You are not just playing with your own life when you play with a taken person.

jmjoseph · Jul 18, 2009, 12:12 PM

Does he love the cook at the diner he goes to because his wife quit cooking? Does he love the dry cleaner who irons his shirts when she doesn't? Does he love the housekeeper who cleans up his mess? You are providing a service to him. He is using the " my wife doesn't give me any..." excuse to make YOU feel better, and HIM justify his infidelity. If he truly loves you, he would be with you. This guy is the lowest of cheaters. His wife is at home with a newborn baby, probably still sore, and he's out having sex with another woman. Never mind HELPING with things around the house that come up at times like that. No, he's too busy worrying about "getting his". Selfish jacka$$.

As far as why women don't want to have sex after birthing, if that's even a question you should be asking, my wife approached me first after both of our sons were born. So, could he be lying? No, of course not.

Reach down inside yourself deep and pull yourself confidence back up to the forefront. Don't let another day go by thinking so little of yourself as to let someone like him stick you on the shelf and USE you as a sex toy whenever he can sneak away. Find yourself a real man that will treat you like a lady. Good luck to you, and GOD bless you.

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 01:22 PM

I try to stop it, as well did he, but we can not get to separate us for each other. He want to leaf his wife for me, but don't want to loose his child. We see each other for 'n year now. He told me that they don't have sex from before the child birth, and we didn't know each other then. He told me that they have 4play in the time that we were together, and that how can he said no because she can't suspect something, and look for a way to get out of the marrieds.

Alty · Jul 18, 2009, 01:29 PM

Originally Posted by Marlie

I try to stop it, as well did he, but we can not get to separate us for each other. He want to leaf his wife for me, but don't want to loose his child. We see each other for 'n year now. He told me that they don't have sex from before the child birth, and we didn't know each other then. He told me that they have 4play in the time that we was together, and that how can he said no because she can't suspect something, and look for a way to get out of the marrieds.

You tried to stop it? How? It's not that hard, just stop seeing him, there, done, finished.

He wants to leave his wife, yet he's still with her. Funny how that's usually the case.

Of course he's not having sex with his wife, he has you for that. She's the mother of his child, the woman he lives with, sleeps with, spends time with. You're the woman he goes to for a bit of sex. He has the best of both worlds, why would he change that?

You're not important to him. In fact, he could replace you in a heartbeat.

Will he divorce her? Could be. Then, if he marries you, you become the wife and someone else become the mistress.

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 01:38 PM

I know I sounding like a , but I really love him. Please tell me why do he then tell me all this things like he want to marry me, I am the women in his life and so on? Please help I want some advice.

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 01:43 PM

Reach down inside deep yourself and pull yourself confidence back up to the forefront. Don't let another day go by thinking so little of yourself as to let someone like him stick you on the shelf and USE you as a sex toy whenever he can sneak away. Find yourself a real man that will treat you like a lady. Good luck to you, and GOD bless you

Thank you for you answer, it mean a lot, esspecally from 'n man.

Alty · Jul 18, 2009, 01:50 PM

Originally Posted by Marlie

I know I sounding like a , but I really love him. please tell me why do he then tell me all this things like he want to marry me, I am the women in his life and so on? please help I want some advice.

Why does he tell you he wants to marry you? Because he doesn't want to lose his sex toy. If he tells you there's no hope then you'll probably move on. This way he can have his wife and you too.

Would you really want to marry a man that cheats? Do you really think he'd be faithful to you? If so, you're dreaming. Keep going and that dream will turn into a nightmare.

Your choice. Your life. Personally I'd rather be alone then have someone that only wants me for sex.

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 02:36 PM

So what you are saying is that there is no change that this man can really love me and want to be with me I'm only his sex toy??

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 02:43 PM

Mjoseph; Does he love the cook at the diner he goes to because his wife quit cooking? Does he love the dry cleaner who irons his shirts when she doesn't? Does he love the housekeeper who cleans up his mess? You are providing a service to him. He is using the " my wife doesn't give me any..." excuse to make YOU feel better, and HIM justify his infidelity. If he truly loves you, he would be with you. This guy is the lowest of cheaters. His wife is at home with a newborn baby, probably still sore, and he's out having sex with another woman. Never mind HELPING with things around the house that come up at times like that. No, he's too busy worrying about "getting his". Selfish jacka$$.

Well it's a year later from his child birth. He is the one who cooks and provide. He helps around the house and specially with there child, I know that his child is important to him and so he told me.

jenniepepsi · Jul 18, 2009, 02:43 PM

Most likely yes marlie.

He loves his wife. But isn't getting any sex at home. So he went looking else were..

Correct?

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 02:47 PM

But if he want to he can get at home? Why going to all of this then

redhed35 · Jul 18, 2009, 02:47 PM

It's a harsh truth marley,but married men rarely leave their wife for the mistress.

It will always be something.. you may love him,but is this the relationship you want,if you were happy with this situation,you would not have asked for impartial advice... my strong suggestion is,take the advice given and run with it,start your life..

Just say no when he makes that booty call.

Marlie · Jul 18, 2009, 02:52 PM

But why do married men do this?

JudyKayTee · Jul 18, 2009, 02:55 PM

Okay, here we go again - I smell a troll. I hope I'm wrong... but my spidey senses were tingling a day or two ago and I was dead on.

In the event I am wrong - maybe you're better in bed than his wife; maybe you don't nag at him to take out the garbage; maybe sex outside of marriage is exciting to him; maybe he loves you; maybe he'll marry you - although that will be difficult because I don't see he's moving toward a divorce; maybe he can't find anybody else but you and is bored with sex at home; maybe he's a serial cheater (I'm an investigator. Some people cheat once and learn. Some cheat, like it and become serial cheaters). I don't know. No one knows but him.

In the meantime - and this is purely a moral jdugment - you are breaking up a home, a home with a child. What goes around, comes around. I gave up on believing in law a long time ago (I post on the legal threads). I DO believe in Karma. What you are doing with this man to another women is going to be done to you. Write my words down so you can read them when it happens.

You two can't resist each other. I can't resist ice cream. That's why I don't stand too near the ice cream section in the supermarket.

But, as I said, reading through, reading the inconsistent postings - troll.

PS - I'm going to sign off now and count all the nickels I've collected from men who have told me they aren't having sex at home OR their wives don't understand them OR they are only in the marriage for the sake of the children. It's going to take me a long time to count all those nickels, by the way.

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