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91mustangfreak · Jul 9, 2009, 06:27 PM

Hi everybody thanks for reading my question. Not really sure why my ex-wife still calls me? We were married for right at 10 yrs an we had 5 kids together. There is a lot more to say here but I don't want to write a book here just give a brief question. Anyway, we separated in Aug. of 2006 the 23rd day, can't really remember how long it was that she started seeing somebody else but Christmas of that year my parents went to their house to give the kids their presents. Dad an the step mom came back to tell me a guy named Chris was there. I assume that they stayed together during that time of our separation, I was told that my then wife was pregnant with his kid. I had already decided that divorce for me was the thing to do but I decided that before she supposively became pregnant, the divorce was final a year ago. Ok fast forward a little bit here a couple months ago I was going through a rough time I have been staying at my dads ever since the separation but I was staying in motels when I was at home as I drive a truck for a living. Anyway she has been calling me off an on in the past 6 months or so but she had called me one night an was wanting to come to the motel which yeah it sounded like a great idea but I stuck to the thought that got me where I am today an didn't let her come. Duno if she was intending to actually show up but guess I'll never know. I pay child support that I started myself back in Nov. '06 an we went to court June 6th 2009 to see if I could get it reduced some due to the lack of work, which after I pay the child support an taxes I don't really have a check at all or at least not enough to be on my own. Well didn't get it dropped any but yes it looked as if she was pregnant again an told her so LOL Couple days later my step mom had told me that my ex an Chris had, had another child which she had gave birth to a couple days before our court date. Like I said she's been calling me off an on when I found out about the 2nd child they had I didn't question her about it an still to this day haven't. Well I have went as far as to get my number changed on my cell but the other night she had called dads house. Could anyone explain to me what's going on with this?

N0help4u · Jul 9, 2009, 06:43 PM

Maybe her marriage gets bad sometimes and she starts thinking about the good times with you.
Maybe she is just concerned that you are okay,
Maybe she just wants to feel that she is staying on good terms with you.

Maybe you should ask her why does she call.

450donn · Jul 9, 2009, 07:56 PM

I guess if it really bothers you that much, block her number or when she calls do not answer the phone.

Jake2008 · Jul 9, 2009, 09:48 PM

She has 7 kids now, and I hope her live-in has a good job, and is also paying child support.

You need to speak to her regularly, for updates on the kids, visitations, etc. I would keep it at that level, and not encourage her to rely on you for emotional support. She has made her bed so to speak.

Keep it cordial, for the sake of the kids, but keep her at arms length.

N0help4u · Jul 10, 2009, 03:43 AM

I was thinking she was calling because of the kids but if that is it then I don't know why the OP would be questioning the calls.
Hmmmmm

talaniman · Aug 10, 2009, 07:33 AM

Good idea to keep the contact cordial, and on the level of keeping abreast what's going on with the kids. I have no clue as to why she is calling, other than that though. That's a question only she can answer.

Zlata · Aug 11, 2009, 08:29 AM

I would recommend you to stay aside. If she has anything important to say, she knows how and where to contact you, email/voicemail strongly recommended (as it will be reported). When she is trying to contact you, means she wants something from you. Once she is unable to say what she wants exactly, she wants to cover and not to "play" open game. No need for you to go through her reasons. I would make it formal, this is the way how to avoid "misunderstandings" and other problems in long term.

Golden_Girl · Aug 22, 2009, 07:35 PM

I suggest ask her why she continues to call you? Is she calling about the kids or is it something more personal? Maybe she is trying to move on with her life as well but unable to completely let go and misses you? Ten years is a long time. Next time she calls ask her thses questions and also ask her to not call unless it is about the children the both of you have together.

twinkiedooter · Aug 30, 2009, 11:27 AM

Sounds like she misses her meal ticket - you know, the one who was gone a lot as in driving a truck and never home. Apparently her new man is home too much to suit her and she doesn't like it. Most truck drivers wives are alone a lot. Apparently this "new" guy is getting on her nerves and she obviously wants you back as you were probably much less fuss and upkeep than her new guy is. Having someone around the house all the time can be a shock to a woman who had all the time in the world and no one looking over her shoulder telling her what to do and what not to do. Most OTR driver's wives would treat the "home time" as a second honeymoon every month when her man did come home She is just having pangs of "oh gee, I wish my never home hubby was here instead of the guy who never goes anywhere".

Change your phone number on your cell (you already did) and get a caller ID for your parent's phone so your parents can answer when they see it's her calling so you don't have to speak to her. The last thing you want would be to be taken in by her again. 5 kids are more than enough. Are you paying child support for the 6th kid? Or did you have a DNA test to prove paternity?