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clbrando · Jul 7, 2009, 01:31 PM

After 3 years of living with my boyfriend (32), he suddenly broke up with me(33), and I mean suddenly, told me to pack up and leave. I found out he is now with a 21 year old who used to date his friend for 3 years. It has been 2 weeks and I have not heard one word from him. Is it really that he could care less whether I am okay or not? He didn't care where I had to go after he put me out or if I was grief stricken?

jenniepepsi · Jul 7, 2009, 01:34 PM

Sounds like a cheater to me hon. I don't think he cares. :( I'm sorry. Move on. He obviously doesn't love you the way you love him. You deserve better.

It sounds to me like he was seeing this 21 year old BEFORE he broke it off with you, felt guilty and broke up with you before you could find out he was cheating.

Torrid13 · Jul 7, 2009, 02:00 PM

Oh wow. I am so sorry. I can't even imagine.
:(

When people do things we just don't understand, we try to get into their heads and try to figure out all the angles. Unfortunately, this approach, which I am seriously guilty of, just ends up feeding the hurt, because we never truly know why people act like jerks and do things to hurt us.

I would never associate with him or his friends ever again, to be quite honest. Pick up all the pieces you can, and start rebuilding a new life. Go buy a new dress and go out with girlfriends, find a new hobby, or even better, go on a vacation, or even just a small weekend trip.

I've heard of some real scumbags before, but this guy takes the cake.
Good luck.

sully123 · Jul 7, 2009, 03:11 PM

I am sorry also, he doesn't sound like a nice person to tell you to pack your bags and leave. Then move's on the someone else, that's low. It's a blessing for you but its too new, you can't see that. YOU are so better off without this man. Did you see this coming was their somekind of disagreement, or something? I just find it hard, out of nowhere, someone would be capable of hurting someone like that.

makapuu · Jul 7, 2009, 03:44 PM

It does seem abrupt for him to send you packing, but he probably had it planned out ahead of time. It is obvious that he is selfish, so you shouldn't expect him to consider much grief you are having.
They deserve each other, and will most likely treat each other the same way when the time comes.

artlady · Jul 7, 2009, 03:53 PM

If this is the way he treats you after three years,he is a sorry excuse for a human being and while I understand you are hurting right now I think he did you a favor.

I would not treat my enemy the way he treated you.He should be ashamed of himself,and he would be ,if he had any conscience.

To answer your question,clearly he does not care or he would not have been so cruel.I am sorry he hurt you but believe me,you sound like you would be better off without the likes of him.

clbrando · Jul 8, 2009, 05:40 AM

Thank you all so much. Yes, it really was as sudden as I say. Saturday night he told me he loved me, sent me a text saying he loved me told a friend of mine he saw out he loved me and then Sunday, poof, see you and not a word since. His mom has called but he is off doing his thing. I am an educated, career woman who did everything for this man, took care of him, loved him and he is off going to clubs and running around with 20-22 year olds now. CONFUSED!!

HistorianChick · Jul 8, 2009, 05:51 AM

Aww... I'm so sorry, hon. Men. Sheesh. :)

I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with a careless, inconsiderate, cheating, no good, mean person. No one deserves that.

He isn't thinking of your heart now, he's thinking of his needs. I'm sure you've heard it before, but you're SO much better off.

You deserve someone so much better.

I wish I could tell you something that would help with the pain, but it will get better. I promise.

kctiger · Jul 8, 2009, 06:37 AM

Men suck don't they... :cool:

sylvan_1998 · Jul 8, 2009, 07:11 AM

If this is that abrupt of a personality change, I am thinking drugs or brain tumor. Either way, good for you that you don't have to clean up the mess.

I really feel for you. Good luck and keep yourself busy.

winding200 · Jul 8, 2009, 07:24 AM

clbrando,
I am so sorry to hear that. Be strong and be positive. As we know, it is not about you, but he is the cheater. He planned it for a while on your back, and he does not care about you or what you feel anymore. He provably cannot wait to be with the new 21old. What comes around is goes around. Let the cheater have the 21 old, his friend's ex. Who knows what kind of drama he will create with her? The cheating man is no more your business.

The good news is you know the truth before it is too late. It could be much worse if you find it out about the 'real him' after you both got married and have kids. Thanks god, you did not marry him. Another good news is you know his real color, and do not have to deal with lingering feelings. It will be much easier to start new life. Pack your stuff completely, and leave ASAP. It is not worth to spend another second there. You will find a much better person who deserves you. Take a get away trip, refresh yourself, make a new plan for your future. It seems God gave you a favor. Be positive and strong!

clbrando · Jul 8, 2009, 07:46 AM

Thank you all so much. Really. I know you all speak the truth, it is just hard to swallow that after 3 years someone can swiftly turn off their feelings. I was blind I guess. It is a tough pill to swallow but I know in the long run I know I will be better off.

talaniman · Jul 8, 2009, 09:28 AM

Congratulations on gaining your freedom to find a real man who deserves a real female.

I am happy for you, and in time, you will be very happy also.

You kissed a frog, who wasn't a prince, that's all.