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    Kar233's Avatar
    Kar233 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 30, 2009, 01:26 AM
    Forbidden Love
    :confused: Okay, so I will start by saying that I met this guy last summer and my best friend is dating his brother. Anyway, I still like him now that it has been a over a year since I last saw him. I got over him once though after we stopped hanging out. Just recently I was hanging out with my best friend when he texted me and we texted about some stuff and got to know each other a little and then finally he asked me out and told me that he had liked me for a long time. We both were in a relationship last summer but we liked each other. So the day after he asked me out me and my friends went over to his house and hung out I rode on the back of his quad and I was perfectly happy. That night I couldn't sleep I was happier than I have ever been. I was not being myself. I was crazy and weird. That night he asked me if I wanted to go to the movies with him the next day so I said if you want me to and he said yes. So we had a whole party going to the movies to see transformers 2 and I rode with him and a friend and the others rode with his parents. By the way I'm almost 17 and he's 20. At the movies we started to get more comfortable with each other and we held hands and stuff. We barely ever talk but we texted a lot. We went out for two days. When he took me home we hung out at my friends for a while and I was keeping him warm but he seemed weird. I told him I had to go after a while and I guess his ex called him after I left. I don't know what was said but he texted me when he got home (he lives right down the road) and was acting different. We broke up after going out for 2 days. I was devastated. I cried because I had liked him for so long and was starting to really fall for him. We still text to this day but just a few days ago he asked me do you want to be friends and see how it go's from there so I said yeah of course! We have been texting and I just want to know if he wants to get back together? Wants to stay friends? Get to know me better before we go out again? He said he broke up with me because of the age difference but I think It's because of his ex a little bit. I don't know what he wants to do but I'm going to wait for him. I don't know what to talk to him about or anything. Could you guys help me out with what all this means and what I could talk to him about?? Thanks! P.S. I also think that he just needs time.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #2

    Jun 30, 2009, 01:57 AM
    I think there is certainly chemistry there with the two of you, but maybe you are reading more into this than is there.

    If his ex is still in the picture, perhaps he is still 'friends' with her if you get my drift. He may be looking to start a new relationship, but he still has one foot in the last one.

    Try not to look too 'needy' and available because you are so taken with him. Make sure for your own sake, that he let's you know he's ready to see you exclusively, and that his last relationship is truly over.

    Best of all worlds would be to give him time as you've already thought. He may not be involved with his ex, but if she's still texting him, then he's still got something going on with her.

    You will have a much greater chance of success with him if you give him time, and no pressure.
    Kar233's Avatar
    Kar233 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jun 30, 2009, 02:21 AM

    Thanks, but I know I should give him time but I'm so afraid that if I do that I will lose him forever.
    Holly23's Avatar
    Holly23 Posts: 180, Reputation: 15
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    #4

    Jun 30, 2009, 02:58 AM

    Ok Im going to throw a harsh truth up here now.
    Kar233... There was a reason why ye broke up in the first place, maybe he thought you were annoying, maybe you thought he was to flirtey.. What Im saying is, unless you have both discussed what was wrong the last and fixed it.Then its bound to happen again you see?. and maybe from what you've told us.. it already has?
    Kar233's Avatar
    Kar233 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jun 30, 2009, 03:27 AM

    Um, thanks.. (I guess).. but I don't know what to do. It's really hard when someone asks you out and breaks up with you two days later and you don't really know why and I don't want to bring the whole thing up because I feel bad and than I think . And I barely ever talked so how could I be annoying? And we are both shy so I don't see him being flirty? Get your story straight. Can some one who gives better advice please help me?
    Holly23's Avatar
    Holly23 Posts: 180, Reputation: 15
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    #6

    Jun 30, 2009, 04:31 AM

    Sorry those were only examples I wasn't actually implying you were annoying or he flirts a lot I was just trying to make my point clear obviously that didn't work.Did you ever think that the fact ye don't really talk was a problem..
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #7

    Jun 30, 2009, 04:38 AM

    Did he know your age upfront? It could be because where you live, you are jail bait and he doesn't want to risk going to jail
    Holly23's Avatar
    Holly23 Posts: 180, Reputation: 15
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    #8

    Jun 30, 2009, 04:40 AM

    But if there not sexually active?
    Not arguing with you scottgem, just trying to figure it out...
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #9

    Jun 30, 2009, 04:45 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Holly23 View Post
    but if there not sexually active?
    Not arguing with you scottgem, just trying to figure it out...
    But that's the point, he wants sex (remember he's 20) and realizes it might be illegal to do it with her.
    Holly23's Avatar
    Holly23 Posts: 180, Reputation: 15
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    #10

    Jun 30, 2009, 04:50 AM

    Ahhh I forgot his age..
    That's a good point.
    What is the legal age for sex in america?
    I realise it may be different in various states..

    Why do you assume his ex called after you left?
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #11

    Jun 30, 2009, 04:51 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Holly23 View Post
    What is the legal age for sex in america?
    I realise it may be different in various states..
    Yes it is, it ranges from 14-18, also the age gap can make a difference. So its certainly possible she would be jail bait at 16.
    Holly23's Avatar
    Holly23 Posts: 180, Reputation: 15
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    #12

    Jun 30, 2009, 04:54 AM

    14?
    Oh my god...
    I see, what is it in your state Kar?

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