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celticfan · Jun 28, 2009, 04:59 PM

Hi Everyone

I'm a 23 year old male virgin and have been with my girlfriend for 6 months (before this she was a really good friend at uni) and I think I'm ready to 'pop my cherry' but I'm not sure what to do. I went to a catholic all boys school until I was 18 so we didn't get taught much and before I met my girlfriend I hadn't had any previous relationships.

I just want to know what should I do to her and what should I expect from her? :confused:

bronzebabe · Jun 28, 2009, 07:45 PM

I'm sorry. Even a Catholic guy at 23 KNOWS what sex is about. We can't tell people in here how to have sex.
Buy yourself a sex manual at the book store. It can help you out.

JoeCanada76 · Jun 28, 2009, 07:53 PM

Let her do the Leading. It will come. It does take practice. All depends on if your ready or not.

It takes exploring of each other. Everybody is different. Understand about the Catholic school and having no previous relationships.

Does this person know you're a virgin? Be honest and open and try to relax, stressing out will not help.

Gemini54 · Jun 28, 2009, 09:17 PM

Have you never done any kissing and touching? That's what sex is - an extension of kissing and touching that each person finds pleasurable.

It's a bit hard to tell you what to do - each person is different and doesn't come with a Manual of Procedures. Being comfortable with sex takes time and experience so, it will probably be awkward at first.

Why don't you talk to your GF and you can explore it together - make the exploration fun and pleasurable rather than feeling you have to perform to a prescribed outcome. I know it sounds simple, but it is about your approach and attitude - if you're worried about it, then she will be too.

As a last resort, you can try googling - 'how to be a good lover', but in the end it's about doing what feels good for both of you.

celticfan · Jun 29, 2009, 04:43 AM

Originally Posted by Jesushelper76

Let her do the Leading. It will come. It does take practice. All depends on if your ready or not.

It takes exploring of each other. Everybody is different. Understand about the Catholic school and having no previous relationships.

Does this person know your a virgin? Be honest and open and try to relax, stressing out will not help.

Yes she knows I'm a virgin, we've talked about it and I think I'm ready with her.

slapshot_oi · Jul 1, 2009, 12:56 PM

I don't know what to say other than bite the bullet, practice makes perfect, there's a first time for everything, nothing ventured nothing gained, better late than never...

No one read a manual their first time, and no one was a stud their first time. Just play it cool and you'll get it.

Vicky_vtec · Jul 1, 2009, 01:24 PM

My first time having sex I was 15. I remember it like it was yesterday. I had explained to the guy I was a virgin and he as very understanding. We took things slow and he asked me continusly was I OK, this calmed me down and made me feel reasured that I knew I was doing the right thing. I'l never forget the rush of butterflies I had all day as I knew that was the night where I would give this person my all. Looking back on it now and even an hour after wards I have no idea why I was so nervous. It is a natural thing to show just how much you love someone.

There is no right and wrong when making love to someone. If your looking to thrill your partner on your first time the chances of that are very slim. Good sex comes with practice and getting to know your own body and your partners. Some people find some things when having sex more enjoyable. There is nothing that everybody likes. Its personal taste.

It will all come in time. Be patient.

Synnen · Jul 2, 2009, 07:35 AM

Originally Posted by celticfan

Yes she knows I'm a virgin, we've talked about it and I think I'm ready with her.

The fact that you only THINK you are ready concerns me.

How about just enjoying each other, and seeing where it goes from there, rather than thinking about it so much?

Seriously--if you stress about it, it's MUCH less likely that either of you will enjoy it anyway.

Relax, have fun together, and see if that having fun ends up happening with clothes off too!

celticfan · Jul 18, 2009, 05:15 PM

Originally Posted by bronzebabe

I'm sorry. Even a Catholic guy at 23 KNOWS what sex is about. We can't tell people in here how to have sex.
Buy yourself a sex manual at the book store. It can help you out.

Well I didn't mean that I meant what to do before hand, like light candles and foreplay and what should I do if I finish in a matter of seconds:(

jenniepepsi · Jul 18, 2009, 05:23 PM

Originally Posted by celticfan

Well I didn't mean that I meant what to do before hand, like light candles and foreplay and what should I do if I finish in a matter of seconds:(

If 'premature ejaculation' happens, don't worrie. Its common for your first time. And if she cares about you, she will be understanding and supportive.

And the wonderous thing about sex, is even after a PE, you can rest up about 5 minutes and try again, and the second time around should be much more satisfying :) good luck hon

jmjoseph · Jul 18, 2009, 05:27 PM

Originally Posted by celticfan

Well I didn't mean that I meant what to do before hand, like light candles and foreplay and what should I do if I finish in a matter of seconds:(

Ignore the wise cracks and insults.
If you "finish in a matter of seconds", no big deal. It happens to ALL OF US. It'll get better with time. You've gone this far, just be sure you are ready. Is this a serious relationship? Could she be the one? They've got several books out now concerning the " ins and outs" (pun intended), "The Sensuous Man" was one I read at 15 ( it was my big brother's). Good luck to you what ever you decide. Wear a condom.

talaniman · Jul 18, 2009, 08:33 PM

Talaniman Rule-If you get yours, make sure she gets hers.

You can best go about that by telling her your fears before hand, and letting her guide you after that. Tell her, what you told us.

sweet1028 · Jul 18, 2009, 11:02 PM

If you think about it too much it's not going to be as great. Enjoy yourself and don't worry about if you are doing bad. It's your first time, no one is perfect.

Most guys do pre-ejaculate their first time. Most girls know this already and probably won't say anything at all even if they don't orgasm. If you do want her to orgasm, and afraid she won't, go with the foreplay. Give her an orgasm before and that way both of you will be satisfied.

As others have said though, you want to make sure that this is the right girl. Are you sure she is after only 6 months? If so, go for it. If having second thoughts, you might want to wait. Good Luck. Don't worry, you can't gain experience without some practice.

celticfan · Jul 24, 2009, 06:47 AM

Originally Posted by sweet1028

If you think about it too much it's not going to be as great. Enjoy yourself and don't worry about if you are doing bad. It's your first time, no one is perfect.

Most guys do pre-ejaculate their first time. Most girls know this already and probably won't say anything at all even if they don't orgasm. If you do want her to orgasm, and afraid she won't, go with the foreplay. Give her an orgasm before and that way both of you will be satisfied.

As others have said though, you want to make sure that this is the right girl. Are you sure she is after only 6 months? If so, go for it. If having second thoughts, you might want to wait. Good Luck. Don't worry, you can't gain experience without some practice.

Thnaks everyone

I've spoken to my girlfriend about all my worries and yes she's 'the one' I actually proposed last night on her birthday.

shazamataz · Jul 24, 2009, 08:05 AM

Wow, congratulations, did she say yes? :D

sweet1028 · Jul 24, 2009, 10:07 AM

Big congrats! I hope she said yes!

celticfan · Jul 24, 2009, 03:35 PM

Originally Posted by shazamataz

Wow, congratulations, did she say yes? :D

Yes she said Yes:D:D:D:D:D

<3 <3 <3

mylukup · Jul 24, 2009, 05:42 PM

Well, I know SHE should expect it not to last long, it's your first time. So the weight is more on her than on you simply because she's experienced. Right? All I can say is relax, don't act nervous and know that you deserve understanding and patience. If she can't do that for you then that's a good sign of what type of person she is... in a way. Practice makes perfect... most of the time.

jmjoseph · Jul 24, 2009, 06:08 PM

Originally Posted by celticfan

Yes she said Yes:D:D:D:D:D

<3 <3 <3

I'm very happy for you two. I hope it lasts forever!

sweet1028 · Jul 24, 2009, 10:05 PM

Originally Posted by celticfan

Yes she said Yes:D:D:D:D:D

<3 <3 <3

That's great I'm really happy for the two of you. If the wedding is not too far away maybe you could wait until the honeymoon and that would be a great experience. Plus on a honeymoon, you know it happens more than once. Have a great life together!!