[shazamataz]

I am curious to know your level of education and your plans when - and if - you get out of the sex industry.

That is a good point. When you are older your work will die down.
While there are some that enjoy the company of older women odds are you won't be making as much money.

[excon]

Hello:

These girls make a LOT of money. I mean, a LOT of money! Did I say that they can get RICH??

IF they invest it wisely, they can live happily every after and even become somebody's grandma.

excon

[cherno]

Counselling can't be done on net. It is face to face interaction. If you are loving your job with utmost security, then I feel there is no harm in continuing your job. At any moment or at any juncture if you feel like quitting this then please quit this job provided you have the secured job. You try to be busy round the clock in any other job that you do; then you can over come this sex instinct.

I am an example, I work round the clock from morning 9 to night 10. Then I feel tired and get sleep easily. At any time if I feel like I have sex with ( once in a month or twice). Because of busy schedule your body become tired and wants some rest.

Initially you reduce the sex work from 3/week to 2 and to 1. Involve yourself in some other work. Make yourself busy and then you can control the addiction. If you want any help do contact over ***EMAIL REMOVED

Edit by Synn: Please keep all contact here on the boards. Asking for off-site contact can be dangerous to one or both parties.

[bigNavySeal]

QUOTE=Nestorian;1758570]Yes, opinions of others are rather harsh, cold, and cruel; but most of all ignorent and Foolish. Yes, I do all the time. People don't like doing the things I do because I don't like to party (a fear of crowds) or drink as much as every one else. (family hystory of alcoholism.) I also don't want to be so selfish like most people. Big house, two people live in it? (Really, seriously, we kill how many achers of forest to make one house. How many animals homes are destroyed? Then when they wander into town we kill them because we are territorial? Who are the real animals? Those who are incapable of intelegence, or those who choose to be ignorent?) We don't need as much as we have, but every one wants more, and more, until there is nothing left to have. I don't know how to survive in Canada with out being like that, and I Don't know any one who shares my veiws, so I stand alone, broken and sucked into that same life style I hate. I really want to be a social worker, to help children/youth. I wanted to start a program where maybe I could educate them how to get a long, be individuals, respect the world around them, and appreciate living with a little less, to give a little more. Yeah, I get strange looks, told how stupid that is, that I'm crazy, and as a result I've isoalted myself from most others. I spend most of my time alone, because I voice myself. Especailly when some one makes foolish assumptions about things on the news, or other people. I dislike people who think that life works one way, and only one way. I believe that "life is pliable." It is adaptable, and always changing. That's why anything is possible, because things are always in motion and ever changing. (Sorry that was so long, just wanted to show you, you are not alone.)

[/QUOTE]

Nestorian, you have great views and insights and do not just live up to the standards of the society around you wants you to be. Although I of course do not have to tell you, try and find some really challenging things to satisfy your desires of helping/teaching e.g. street children or even learn about different cultures. I am from the Netherlands and I was quite sick and tired of our well-polished society, but with many societal and attitudal (is that a word.. ) flaws... so I decided to go and live in a third-world country, well not really, I'm currently living in Bangkok, Thailand, which is half Westernised and there are here literally a million contradictions and contrasts, yet its such a fascinating experience and there are so many fascinating situations I face. Just FYI...

To Meow, you do seem as a very sensitive and smart person. From what I believe your job gives you value because you can actually get to know people when they are often the most exposed (intimacy), yet have no real responsibility to you, which I can definitely understand. As this is one of the what I believe lesser difficult situations to deal with in terms of relationships. I am myself generally a shy person, 24 year old male, who has a strong sense of do's and no-do's in terms of social, ethical and moral values, e.g. I am careful in making decisions that force me in difficult situations, e.g. related to relationships whether they are for sex or building a true relationship.

I currently live in Bangkok, and if you want to see the most sleezy versions of prostituation you have got it here. I personally do not repulse or hate either the women or men who indulge in prostitution. It happens a lot in the world. It just feels to me that there is something inherently wrong with society. I don't mind looking at it (if you have ever been to Bangkok, I sometimes walk through Pat Pong just to look and observe the world around me and the physicality of prostitution and actually enjoy this kind of inviting atmosphere of just instant pleasure and gratification if I go there, but… I always constrain myself). Although it's different versions of prostitution (e.g. you indulge in upper-class prostitution) for me it's a matter of ethical restraint. A particular mind set. Having sex is a particular mind-set, depending on the relationships. One night stand, partner exchange, prostitution, boyfriend/girlfriend and marriage sex are all sex/relationship forms. I am too inexperienced to say whether one is better than the other if they actually are... but personally I believe the more responsible you are in intimacy, for that matter in any indulgence of any sort (e.g. drugs, alcohol, even relationships, sports, work…) the more spiritually advancing it is. Otherwise I think that you will (as is logical) want keep fulfilling your desires, and those desires become more intense and before you know it you are addicted. That’s why all the great spiritual leaders speak about personal restraint. Besides that from what you’re writing you also get complexities of relationships and love issues, which only bring along unwanted complexities between not just you and your customer but also their partners/relationships, etc. so in some way I would say it could go into a vicious circle…? I don’t know I am just imagining how I would think when I was in such a position. Good luck with your counselor and your thoughts.

Best Regards,

Cuno

[UrTeddyBear]

You should definitely be careful just because you work with a higher clientel doesn't mean you're safe.l. there's plenty of crazy rich people too. It is not going to be right because obviously prostitution is wrong and selling your soul is going t catch up to you one day be careful and take care of yourself put money back so that you don't have to keep doing this to yourself you say you're happy but this isn't the kind of thing that is going to fulfill you deep down in your soul. It sounds to me like you're trying really hard to balance the challenges of a double life and eventually its going to catch you be careful out there though

Love
UrTeddyBear

[Meow420]

It is not going to be right because obviously prostitution is wrong and selling your soul is going t catch up to you one day be careful and take care of yourself put money back so that you dont have to keep doing this to yourself you say youre happy but this isnt the kind of thing that is going to fulfill you deep down in your soul. it sounds to me like youre trying really hard to balance the challenges of a double life and eventually its gonna catch you be careful out there though

Ok first and foremost, prostitution is not wrong and is not selling my soul. It may be wrong for YOU and YOUR belief system, but it is not wrong for ME.

How do you know this work doesn't fulfil me deep down? You have no idea. I get a lot out of my job, above and beyond sex.

Thank you for your opinion, but honestly, I don't think you know enough on the subject to be making comments so bold.

[Meow420]

OK so this is an update for all of those that have been follow my threads.

I went and saw the counsellor/therapist on Tuesday. It was awesome.
It opened up a whole different issues I need to deal with lol but the amount of self acceptance I am feeling is fantastic.

So here are a few things that he spoke to me about, and basically how it all ties into my threads.

After many questions and probing into my brain, the therapist said that My line of work has not played with my head. He said I am a very rational, level headed 30yr old. He could see why I was questioning whether it is right or wrong to be a sex worker and came up with the conclusion that yes a lot of people think it is a bad thing, that is just their opinions. It is not effecting me in a negative way at all.

After our talk he could see my need and love of helping people and he suggested even starting up a group for couples/singles on how to keep sexual relationships healthy.

When I discussed my partner, who is a married man, he basically told me that, that type of relationship is all based on (again) your own belief systems. It might not be something people agree with but at the end of the day, its all about what works for each individual. And as for right now, its working for me quite well.

I told my partner about seeing a therapist. He straight away was very concerned that he was causing me grief, but I assured him, it isn't him, it was just my own head accepting the situation.

The therapist did not want to discuss my partner for long at all. He said that from what he can see, it's a casual relationship that is discreet and for now, bringing joy to my life.

Now, this is where it got interesting. I brought up my sex addiction. After more probing, he came to the conclusion, that I am not adicted to sex, but that I may have an issue with power. Needing power over men. And sex apparently is my tool.

After many questions about my dad, the therapist is very keen to do regressive therapy and hypnosis. I am not too sure on this idea. He says that the most pivotal things in our life, happen before we are 5yrs old. He thinks that something has happened to me when I was young. Could be something small. Could be something bad.

I personally don't want to go probing into that I have blocked out for whatever reason. If I found out my dad molested me, I will seriously kill him. Without even a thought.

Also he said I have unnatural tendacies to protect my loved ones. I don't understand that. I will die for my family. We have been through tough times and Im sure most people are the same. But apparently my need to keep my family safe is abnormal.

So yeah that's pretty much it. It was only one session though, Im going back next week.

It made me realise that, OK, I may be a sex addicted, prostitute that is dating a married man, and that may be something the majority of people in society would not agree with... but that's OK! Its fine! As long as I can look in the mirror every morning and like who I am, be proud of all that Ive accomplished, love my family, make them proud... as long as my family love me then I really don't give a toss what the rest of the world thinks :)

Ok so that's the basics I guess.. Ive been walking around with my head a little higher I must admit lol.

I want to thank all of those who left comments, whether they were helpful or not. I love that this site is an open space for us all to voice all of our different and unique opinions.

When reading peoples questions, don't judge their actions... at the end of the day, they are here for an answer.. lets help people, not put them down x x x x x

[NeedKarma]

So nothing changes. You love yourself and what you do. I guess we can close this thread.

[UrTeddyBear]

Ok first and foremost, prostitution is not wrong and is not selling my soul. It may be wrong for YOU and YOUR belief system, but it is not wrong for ME.

How do you know this work doesnt fulfil me deep down? You have no idea. I get alot out of my job, above and beyond sex.

Thank you for your opinion, but honestly, I dont think you know enough on the subject to be making comments so bold.

I come from a similar background I actually do know quite a bit about where you're at. I know enough to know that Yes, the money is amazing but at the end of the day there is no getting away from the fact that you are selling pieces of yourself, night by night, client to disgusting client. I also know how hard it is hiding such a huge part of your life from the people who care about you. Whether you are to deep in and to proud to acknowledge that is up to you. Honestly from everything I've read I think that you thoroughly enjoy the attention that you get from your, we'll call it "profession" for political correctness sake. And if anybody could make it in that industry without completely losing themselves it would be someone of your nature. However I know that you can't honestly say that this is where you really wanted to be in your life when you were young and dreamed the dreams that turn us into the people we are today. I mean do you really want to be the girl that disappears for days at a time and has all the money in the world but everyoene you know knows to tip toe around where it came from because its this huge secret that everyone pretends they don't really know because they love you (you the real you not the fake hustler you) enough to think better of you than that.

Really though it sounds to me like you absolutely eat up the attention which is why you are seeking "help" and probably why you are on this site writing about it. I am not judging you but I think that the truth of the situation you are putting yourself in is something you desperatly need to hear. So lie to everyone around you lie to your clientel lie to everyone that ever meant anything to you to keep from hurting them (I know I did) but in the end at least be honest with yourself.

[ordinaryguy]

I notice that Jake2008's post, and my post, which were both supportive, have been deleted. I wonder why.

[NeedKarma]

I notice that Jake2008's post, and my post, which were both supportive, have been deleted. I wonder why.

That would be very odd. Are you sure they are in this thread because she has three different threads on the same subject.

[griffers90]

Hi I don't think you're selfish nor is it wrong if you are happy and enjoying your life then who are we to judge you? Are you practising safe sex? Are you harming anyone in anyway or providing a service of female intimacy for men that need it? If this is what you enjoy and you are not harming anyone Then just enjoy you life in a safe manner.

Good on you ! X

[Meow420]

[QUOTE=UrTeddyBear;1781694]Really though it sounds to me like you absolutely eat up the attention which is why you are seeking "help" and probably why you are on this site writing about it. QUOTE]

Ok Im not going to reply to comments like this again...
Im sorry to all those that think I am attention whoring and loving the lime light. I came here looking for answers to questions that I found it difficult to ask people around me.

Im not an attention seeker.
I won't be asking anymore questions here. Its seems people like me aren't allowed to voice their concerns, worries, thoughts without being judged and mis-interrpreted. I got some good feedback and am now seeing a professional and that is the end of this.
Goodbye

[ordinaryguy]

That would be very odd. Are you sure they are in this thread because she has three different threads on the same subject.

You're right, it was on the other thread. What threw me was the identical posts about the counseling session.

Here's Jake2008's post from there, and here's mine.

I wont be asking anymore questions here. Its seems people like me arent allowed to voice their concerns, worries, thoughts without being judged and mis-interrpreted. I got some good feedback and am now seeing a professional and that is the end of this.
Goodbye

I'm sorry for the intolerance you've encountered here, but unfortunately, it's pretty typical. Being far from the norm means that you have to expect to get a lot of crap for it. It goes with the territory.

[Synnen]

I notice that Jake2008's post, and my post, which were both supportive, have been deleted. I wonder why.

Only posts that *I* have deleted in this thread were because of chat speak.

[Pushtumpa]

I'm sorry for the intolerance you've encountered here, but unfortunately, it's pretty typical. Being far from the norm means that you have to expect to get a lot of crap for it. It goes with the territory.

Oh so its OK to be intolerant? I seem to recall Osmosis Bum Leader being a touch intolerant. Same goes for the talibum.

Its intolerance that should not be tolerated. :mad:

You should not have to put up with crap just because some small minded fool disagrees with your views or actions. Society should push back, not accept it.

[smoothy]

Oh so its ok to be intolerant? I seem to recall Osmosis Bum Leader being a touch intolerant. Same goes for the talibum.

Its intolerance that should not be tolerated. :mad:

You should not have to put up with crap just because some small minded fool disagrees with your views or actions. Society should push back, not accept it.

Is it intollerant if we dislike drug abusers, is it intollerant of we chastise people who commit petty larceny rather than get a job and earn that money...

Is it wrong if we chastise members of religious cults...

Are we intollerant if we disagree with people who believe differently than we do, either via religious or our own moral code?




Keep that last point in mind, because it applies here... are YOU being intollerant of people who are expressing their own opinion of morality just because you do not wish to agree with it.

Intollerance is a two edged sword... and sometimes those who complain the loudest are they themselves guilty of intollerance.

At least in this country... you are entitled you freedom of speech, and freedom to practice religion. And incidentally... prositution is illegal in the entire USA except one county in Nevada.

Personally I don't give a hoot either way... but is it intollerance to pursue NAMBLA, child molestors... rapists etc. Those after all are illegal as well, how about petty criminals etc...

Not going off on a tangent there, just pointing out that no one individual particularly someone working outside the law is entitled to be free from criticism. People make choices, and they have to deal with the results of those choices. Good or bad.