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djkluff · May 21, 2009, 05:00 PM

Okay I have a more difficult scenario to deal with.

At 20 years of age, I fulfilled the father role of my wife's daughter. I was in the military at the time. I felt it was right to adopt her (military for free), and make our family whole. She was 7 at the time. I also shared 2 children with my wife.

3 1/2 years later, I divorced her mother, and have had her daughter visit one time. Since the divorce, the daughter has taken to her mother, and does not talk to me. When I have attempted, she uses words that children should eat soap for using. This is now 4 years since the divorce, and the daughter still wants nothing to do with me. The child now lives with her grandmother, not the rmother, because they do not get along either. I have custody of the two children that me and my ex wife share.

I have been researching termination of parental rights, and it is very clear that I will not have a say so in her life. I have even signed legal guardianship over to her grandmother. Now comes the child support portion. I see in some states it is up to the judge whether support will remain. In my case, of an adopted child of 7 years (age 14 now), that wants nothing to do with me and wants me to be out of her life, must my payments remain until age 23?

cdad · May 21, 2009, 05:16 PM

Age 23 ? Im not sure where your getting that from. Are you being or have you been taken to court for support by the Grandmother ?
In most states its until 18 or 21 unless agreed upon by the parties to last longer. That doesn't include arrears.. those last until paid.

djkluff · May 21, 2009, 05:20 PM

Most states support lasts if they are attending college at home, as a full time student, which at age 23 would be terminated.

cdad · May 21, 2009, 05:22 PM

No, Most states aren't like that. They are like I had said. Its not up to the courts to force parents to pay for college. If that were the case the courts would be overwhelmed. What state are we talking about here ?

Fr_Chuck · May 21, 2009, 06:08 PM

Correct very few states would be 23, it would be 18 in many, most don't require payments though collect ( unless your specific order says to) and others will be 20 or 21.

But why don't you have custody of the other child, you have custody of the two, why did you not get custody of this child, you could, or should have also, legally there is no difference.

But her merely not wanting to talk to you has nothing to do with child support what so ever, only a lack of your visits and being part of her life for 7 years. And maybe you taking her two sisters and not her perhaps.

But yes you will most likely be paying support till the end of your court ordered support.

djkluff · May 22, 2009, 03:52 PM

The issue is not WHEN support is automatically over with. As I stated before some states, Indiana included, are until 18, unless the child (now an adult) continues to A) live at home B) go to school full time. Living in a dorm cancels it, and going to school less then full time also does.

Anyway

The child is now 14, and her opinion of who she wants to live with is heavily considered. She wants to live with her grandmother. Her grandmother is more than fully capable of supporting the child. HEr bio mother also wants her to live with her grandmother.

ScottGem · May 22, 2009, 05:03 PM

Please don't quote statute without providing a citation or link to where you got that from. There may be other parts of the law that you are missing.

The facts are that most state laws continue support to 18 or 21. But often the support agreement is negotiated to include as long as the child is a full time student.

But support continues as long as the support order says it continues. Since the child is living with the grandparent, then support should go there, not to the mother.

cdad · May 22, 2009, 07:28 PM

Originally Posted by djkluff

The issue is not WHEN support is automatically over with. As I stated before some states, Indiana included, are until 18, unless the child (now an adult) continues to A) live at home B) go to school full time. Living in a dorm cancels it, and going to school less then full time also does.

ANYWHO

The child is now 14, and her opinion of who she wants to live with is heavily considered. She wants to live with her grandmother. Her grandmother is more than fully capable of supporting the child. HEr bio mother also wants her to live with her grandmother.

Indiana is a state that runs child support until 21.. New York is a state that runs until 21. Most other states do not run that long. Like I had said earlier.

djkluff · May 22, 2009, 08:42 PM

As I said before

[QUOTE=djkluff;1751357]The issue is not WHEN support is automatically over with.QUOTE]

My issue I asked about was more about the TERMINATION of RIGHTS n RESPONSIBILITIES hence the subject

djkluff · May 22, 2009, 08:48 PM

I believe the info was correct, but it still is not my topic of interest
"In Indiana, child support is automatically terminated at age 21, unless the child has been determined to be legally incapacitated or an order for educational support beyond high school is established prior to the child turning 21." Indiana Child Support, Child Support Enforcement
I stand corrected, someone I knew paid until his daughters were both 23... maybe he wasn't even forced to

ScottGem · May 23, 2009, 05:25 AM

Originally Posted by djkluff

I stand corrected, someone I knew paid until his daughters were both 23.....maybe he wasnt even forced to

This is the problem we often run into. Some "hears" from someone else what their experience was and relates that as if it applies to everyone. The issue is that this is a legal forum and responses here need to conform to actual statute.

djkluff · May 24, 2009, 09:31 PM

Your right, but if I knew the answers, I wouldn't be using the "Ask Me Help Desk" - Live answes from Real Experts :D

I do, however, appreciate your help

djkluff · May 25, 2009, 01:42 PM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

This is the problem we often run into. Some "hears" from someone else what their experience was and relates that as if it applies to everyone. The issue is that this is a legal forum and responses here need to conform to actual statute.

Wait a second. You're the responder here, not me! You can site the statutes for me, since you require it. Although your assistance is greatly appreciated on this site, you need to QUIT telling people how they should be answering questions on this site. In another thread you stated that their opinions do not matter, and statutes need to be cited. Seriously, besides factual law, what else do we have but sound advice from other people. Joining single parent groups is a good thing, taking advantage of programs out there to help single parents are great, should he site the locations of these places just to please "you"?

If you are a moderator than its understood, until then... :eek:

ScottGem · May 25, 2009, 01:56 PM

Originally Posted by djkluff

Wait a second. Your the responder here, not me! You can site the statutes for me, since you require it. Although your assistance is greatly appreciated on this site, you need to QUIT telling people how they should be answering questions on this site. In another thread you stated that their opinions do not matter, and statutes need to be cited. Seriously, besides factual law, what else do we have but sound advice from other people. Joining single parent groups is a good thing, taking advantage of programs out there to help single parents are great, should he site the locations of these places just to please "you"?

if you are a moderator than its understood, until then........:eek:

First, I am one of the Mods here. Second, You posted something that looked like a cite, so you need to provide the backup. If you had asked what Indiana laws says on the subject, I would have given you the cite. Third, Opinion doesn't matter if it goes against the law. And people need to be prepared to back up they post. Fourth, your example of posting links to support groups is mixing apples and oranges. Finally, this site has rules and guidelines, some of which I wrote or contributed to. ANY member here has the right to inform other members of those rules or gusielines, not just a moderator.

Fr_Chuck · May 25, 2009, 04:19 PM

Actually to clearify wrong answers the experts here can question things. And as noted Scott is one of the main moderators of the site here

djkluff · May 26, 2009, 09:48 AM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Actually to clearify wrong answers the experts here can question things. And as noted Scott is one of the main moderators of the site here

Exactly my point. I did not give an answer, the original post was mine. I was the one asking for advice. As I said before, the age in which child support is automatically terminated was NOT my question.

ScottGem · May 26, 2009, 09:52 AM

Originally Posted by djkluff

Exactly my point. I did not give an answer, the original post was mine. I was the one asking for advice. As I said before, the age in which child support is automatically terminated was NOT my question.

Actually it WAS part of your question. From your original post; "must my payments remain until age 23?"

You got responses that asked why you thought payments would continue to age 23. Your response was to incorrectly cite Indiana law.

ScottGem · May 27, 2009, 04:05 AM

I have removed your last post because it was in violation of our rules.

But the fact is that you got your answer. A couple of people told you that support will continue until the court order establishing support says it does or until someone else adopts the child.

You brought up the age issue and we tried to help by dealing with that issue. We initially told you that states end support at 18 or 21 unless the support order says different. You argued the point, which is when we asked you to cite where you were getting it from so we could help you interpret it correctly.

All we have tried to do here is help you and all you have done is argue and put down our advice.

JudyKayTee · May 27, 2009, 05:11 AM

Originally Posted by djkluff

The issue is not WHEN support is automatically over with. As I stated before some states, Indiana included, are until 18, unless the child (now an adult) continues to A) live at home B) go to school full time. Living in a dorm cancels it, and going to school less then full time also does.

ANYWHO

The child is now 14, and her opinion of who she wants to live with is heavily considered. She wants to live with her grandmother. Her grandmother is more than fully capable of supporting the child. HEr bio mother also wants her to live with her grandmother.

I would definitely like to know more about where a 14-year old's "opinion" of where she wants to live is "heavily considered."

In NY a 14 year old will most likely want to live wherever there are the fewest rules (a step up from an 11 year old who wants a pony) and while his/her request would be considered it would not be "heavily considered."

We take great pride in our answers on the legal board. Please conform your answers to the Law AND post your source.

djkluff · Jun 1, 2009, 08:27 PM

Wow, offensive towards other people. Hmmmz, all I can say is I am glad you are going to delete my account now, so please do. FR_chucky