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    perplexed1's Avatar
    perplexed1 Posts: 40, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    May 18, 2009, 09:51 PM
    Would this be too forward?
    All right, so back on New Year's I was at a party and met an amazing girl. Beautiful, smart, ambitious, interested in the same things I am, and completely different from anyone I've ever known. We talked for about 2 hours that night, but nothing happened because she was the driver for her group of friends. I managed to get her name and number, but she goes to school in NYC and I'm in Boston. She lives near Boston so I asked her that if she was ever in the area if she wanted to get coffee or something. She said she wouldn't be around for a while but told me to let her know if I was ever in NYC. We talked briefly when she wished me happy birthday but that's about it.

    My question is that now that it's summer and we'll both be nearby, would it be too forward for me to reach out to her and ask to meet up sometime? I was thinking something low key like coffee again, or maybe even dinner. I'm just worried about coming across as a creeper / sketchball so I don't want to do anything that'll come across that way.
    dontknownuthin's Avatar
    dontknownuthin Posts: 2,910, Reputation: 751
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    May 18, 2009, 10:41 PM

    I would say to invite her to dinner while she's home for the summer. Or invite her to a summer concert or festival if you know what she enjoys.

    I don't think there's anything creepy about inviting a woman on a date, particularly if you connected and she provided you with her number.

    She has the option to say "no", and probably won't use it.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #3

    May 19, 2009, 09:37 AM

    It doesn't sound like you've spoken to her since approximately New Years. So I suggest that you follow up with the coffee idea.

    I'm not sure how close (distance wise) you guys are, but it doesn't sound like she's going to make a long trip just to see you, so be prepared to do the travelling, especially in the beginning.

    Why didn't you guys keep in touch by phone or IM?
    perplexed1's Avatar
    perplexed1 Posts: 40, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    May 19, 2009, 09:40 AM

    We haven't really had a conversation since mid January. We're about half an hour apart now. I was incredibly busy last semester, and I also got involved with someone else briefly for a few months. I'll try the coffee thing I think.
    spitvenom's Avatar
    spitvenom Posts: 1,266, Reputation: 373
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    May 19, 2009, 09:40 AM

    The Worse she can say is No. Go for it.
    perplexed1's Avatar
    perplexed1 Posts: 40, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #6

    Jul 1, 2009, 06:48 PM

    Hey, so kind of an update. We tried to meet up in may but she had to cancel last minute (she had a legit reason), but then I asked her to a concert in my hometown in August which is 2 hrs from ny and she said yes. Since then we've still been in touch pretty regularly, but only via the internet, nothing on the phone. I also get the feeling like I'm always the one to initiate conversation, but I haven't really tested it . Basically I really have no idea where it's going right now, but normally my gut is right, and I'm getting the feeling that she likes me, but that nothing's going to happen because of the distance
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
    Uber Member
     
    #7

    Jul 1, 2009, 06:53 PM
    There's nothing "creepy" or "sketchy" about meeting up with an acquaintance for coffee or dinner. She may or may not remember you after 6 months but there's no harm in trying. She just might appreciate having a chance to see you again.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
    Expert
     
    #8

    Jul 1, 2009, 07:11 PM

    Around here, guys calls up girls they just barely meet and ask them to sleep over. ( I guess depending on your age) You will never date if you don't ask them.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #9

    Jul 1, 2009, 07:35 PM

    Go for it. What have you got to lose.

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