[LearningAsIGo]

My grandma was only 45 when I was born (I think)
But I'd like to be young enough to live long enough to see great-grand children =]

Oh, boy! Don't think about great-grandchildren now! Lol... that's nothing you can plan. What if you have 6 kids, 4 grandkids and none of them want children. You see my point... its just nothing to worry about.

Or you could be like my great great aunt and live to be 104. You just never know ;)

[Princess-IMYM]

Ok, living to 104 is my new target ;) 96 was my frist.

Well if I don't have any grandchildren at least I'll see someone else's, hehe

[TSS22]

I just have to say that its incredibly hard to be a mother. Especially a single mother. My sister has a 9 month old and doing it alone. Luckily she has my family to help her but would definitely do things differently if she had the choice. I got pregnant when I was 20. It was not planned but I knew I was going to marry him far before I got pregnant. Its FAR from being easy and there is NO way you will ever know just how hard it is until you are actually a mother. You can try to imagine all day long but will never know until it happens. PLUS!! It takes a HUGE toll on your body! Stretch marks, saggy skin, hormone problems etc. Your 16! You have plenty of time to have a baby. Have fun, I would love to be 16 again!! Enjoy it while you can because once you're a mother, you're a mother forever!

[TSS22]

You should babysit and then you will get a chance to be around babies without actually having one! ;)

[Princess-IMYM]

I can't enjoy being 16 =/
I can only see my friends at school and on days my parents are feeling generous enough to drive me to the train station, I'm in the middle of exams, I'm single (sucks) and constantly lonely even though I have so many friends. I can't wait until I'm older and at least have a family to keep me company.

I used to babysit, but she got too old to be baby sat =( I loved it. And there are better options of who to choose to babysit in my village, I'm like the 5th option, everyone else is older and more "responsible" than me (people immediately assume I'm irresponsible because I have ditzy moments and am particularly strange when I'm happy.)

[TSS22]

I just have to say at 16 you have NO CARES in the world! No bills, no worry about your job or how your going to put food on the table. NOTHING. Lol Seriously its great being 16. I am a stay at home mommy to a 2 year old and I take care of all the bills and the house and my son and its SOOO much work. What I wouldn't give to be 16 again!

You should talk to your mom or dad or someone your close with and tell him how you are feeling. If your were my daughter I would love to know.

[Princess-IMYM]

Haha, I suppose you're right; but I always have a fear of everyone at work suddenly turning on me and hating me D= it's not going to happen but it's still scary.

I don't relate to my mam very well and I try to avoid my dad at all costs. They love me but they aren't really the "parent" type, most teenagers would love to have them because they stay out of my business but sometimes it feels like they don't care. But I know they do =] When they're drunk dad tells me he loves me and say's he'd kill for me and mam always goes on about how similar we are. Hehe

[TSS22]

Well do you have a aunt or family friend you can talk to? I am SURE your parents love you. Some just have a harder time telling there kids. I still think you should try and talk to them. They would want to hear how your feeling. I AM SURE of it! Better now, then after! ;)

Yeah its great being a mother but it will be ONLY greater when you have your life together. You want to make your life as easy as possible when you have your children because you want to provide them with the best life you can. Do you honesly feel you would want to bring a baby into the life you have now? Or would you rather be able to provide a loving home and the proper lifestyle to your baby.

Trust me hun you want to wait!

Just imagine NEVER SLEEPING! Lol seriously my son still wakes in the night!

[Princess-IMYM]

Haa, I don't want one now... maybe I can convince my mam to get another kitten... or a lizard...
I tell my grandma all this stuff, she listens and isn't biased about anything so she shows me what's right =]
She isn't happy how dad keeps telling me to get a life even though I have lived in the same village for 16 and all my friends live over 14 miles away and I can't drive yet.

[DoulaLC]

Do you have plans for after your exams? Ever consider working as a nursery nurse or something similar? Are there opportunities to work, or at least volunteer, in a church crèche or local nursery?

[TSS22]

Well there you go talk to your grandma!

OH I GOT IT! Get a puppy! Omg they are probably as close as having a baby! Lol We have a 6 month old puppy and he is like having another kid! Lol

Anyway good luck hun, I am hoping you make the right decision about this... oh and by the way I never even kissed a boy until I was your age! Lol Never even thought about sex until I was 19! And I am from SD so its not as thought I was in a small city. I was a good girl! ;)

[Princess-IMYM]

Aha no, looking after a lot of children at once makes me panick, I found that out at my work experience in a primary school (I loved it)
I don't really want to 'work' with children.
I don't even have a career in mind yet, all I have is my job as a part time waitress for a hotel my mam is the manager of.

[TSS22]

OH that's a good job! I became a waitress at 16 also and made bank! Make sure you go to College though, you don't want to be a waitress forever! Lol but it's a great way to pay for your schooling!

Aha no, looking after a lot of children at once makes me panick, I found that out at my work experience in a primary school (I loved it)
I don't really want to 'work' with children.
I don't even have a career in mind yet, all I have is my job as a part time waitress for a hotel my mam is the manager of.

[Princess-IMYM]

I'm a good girl too! (kinda; first kiss at age six, bleck I was forced into it!)

I have a puppy, his name is Gilbert, He is very much like a baby, only very hyper and a lot quieter.

[Princess-IMYM]

Im staying on for 6th form and then going to uni (hopefully) however I don't know what to study because I don't know what to choose as a career.

[goldenjewel]

I can say that when I was in middle school I wanted to have a baby and the reason is because I wanted to be responsible and show my parents that I am very responsible. Now I'm graduated from high school and my boyfrien has a kid and sometimes our dates he has to bring his kid along, which told me I made a good decision with not going through it cause I'm free, I don't have to worry about feeding a kid or having to work harder cause I have a baby at home or at school waiting... jus wait honey and take your time buy a dog and cherish it, I have one and I love her to death. She's my baby and this is from someone that wanted a baby that I know now that I wasn't ready for. Good luck to you

[goldenjewel]

i'm 16 and really want a baby, i have since i was 14, i know theres a lot of things like; it takes a lot of money, i'll have no time to myself, it'll ruing my life and stuff like that but i have no life anyway, i have a part time job and theres a girl down the road who had a baby last year so she could give me some stuff.
However i haven't a second party, so i'm still without child and will do so until i'm financially ready. (my own place and job and stuff)
but i don't think this feeling will go away so i was wondering at what age would be best to have a child? I thought it would be better to hear what experienced people had to say.
My mam had me when she was 21 she got married at 20 and she had my brother when she was 24, she's had no more children and doesnt want anymore, and my grandma gave birth to her when she was 21, so i figured 21 was a good age?

Wait at least till you are 24, you might want to party at 21.

[Princess-IMYM]

I don't like parties much.
Alcohol isn't all that nice either.
I'd rather stay home or go shopping than go to a club; I'm rather repulsed by the Idea of going to a club where everyone is too drunk to stand and stoned out of their mind.

[hollylovesbrandon]

You previously said something about how you never get to see your friends and you are pretty much forced into staying at home. You have a job that takes up all your time on the weekend.

Imagine how much of your time a baby would take up. Then you really could never see your friends. And imagine if you had a baby and still couldn't get to that train station when it was sick.

I understand that you don't want to have one now. And I don't think you really want one anyway. I think you want to have something in your life that makes you feel important. You said your mother doesn't pay a lot of attention to you. Maybe, subconsciously it's like "I'm going to be such a better mom...I'll show her." Without even knowing it you could be thinking that.

You can't see your friends because you have no way to get to their homes or wherever they are. You feel cooped up and along you said. A baby is going to make you feel even more cooped up because you won't be able to go ANYWHERE for quite a while. And if you can, you'll have a baby with you and can't have too much fun with your friends. Not to mention that you're so cooped up all the time with a screaming, pooping, crying baby that you'll probably go insane and be asking yourself "what was i thinking?"

You work on the weekends so you feel like you have adult responsibility. Imagine how much responsibility it would be with a baby added.

I know you said you don't want to have one now. I'm not trying to convince you not to or anything. I'm just saying that I think you need to look into the reasons behind WHY you think about this. Maybe once you figure out what's making you feel so... I guess empty... you'll understand why you were having these feelings and can get on the road to amending yourself and finding ways to have normal teenage thoughts.

But yeah, I'm 23 and aching to have a baby. I know I am not ready. I am happily married. That's about the only criteria I meet. We don't have any money or savings. We live paycheck to paycheck. We rent our house from my dad and we have 2 roommates to make the rent. We only have one car so I have to take carpool to work. We're in debt and trying to pay our way out. My husband is still a big kid and wants us to wait. I resepct that and understand it's not in the cards right now. No matter your age, you need to be prepared in these other ways before you even start to think about it. With the mentality, the physical duration and the financial stabilization it's going to be a disaster. I'm still not ready at 23 and my husband at 24.

I hope my advice helped you to understand things.

[Princess-IMYM]

I don't see my job as 'adult responsibility' I see it as a way of getting good money.
I want a baby to fill up the time I have that's so far being filled with "not having a life", I'd rather help someone have a life than not have a life of my own. (if that makes sense) I'd love to teach it things, coo over it and change its nappies and be worried when it gets ill. (I'm abnormally strange like that, you should have seen me when I first stared my P, I was over the moon about everything, even the pain)
I know a pet or a kitten fills these but you can't teach those how to walk or talk, they can't call you "mammy" or tell you about their fist day of school, you can't help them with social problems or give them advice or help with homework. :(
Can't I just want to be a mam without it meaning anything seriously deeper than that?