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runnawaygal · May 13, 2009, 11:17 AM

I'm bisexual only 5 people know(not at work) and I like a girl who's a manager I work with. I know not a good idea but
- She stares at me even when talking to others
- she only says hi to me when there's other people around
- she always helps me when I don't need it.
- I'm clumsy so I ran into her.
- she stands close
- I got her Facebook hasn't added me yet

I'm thinking of asking her for coffee away from work. One girl I think does know at work since she acts like it in a bad way though. Oh and most workers hate her.if I do that though wouldn't things get around and rumors start being like oh yea she and the manager are going out?

My family wouldn't support me if I told them so its hidden for now.

Justwantfair · May 13, 2009, 11:19 AM

Are you ready to get a new job?

The only way you should ever ask her out, is if you are willing to seek different employment.

She would probably be risking her job just to date you.

88sunflower · May 13, 2009, 11:26 AM

It will effect your job. Others will assume your getting special attention while they are not. She may let you get away with more unknowingly. What if the relationship didn't work out? Can you separate that from work? I know there is no relationship at this point. But asking her for coffee may put a strain on your working relationship. What if it makes her uncomfortable. She may be acting this way towards you because some people just naturally connect better with some then others.

I wish · May 13, 2009, 12:12 PM

I'm not convinced that she's interested in you. Sounds like you could be grasping at straws and looking for any possible signs of interest for you on her part.

Either way, it is not a good idea to date a co-worker. It is even worse to date your manager.

Justwantfair is right (had to spread rep), you better be prepared to find a new job if you're going to ask her out on a date.

talaniman · May 13, 2009, 12:20 PM

Work place romance is great when things are good, but lousy when they are not. Work is work and play is play. I think they should be kept SEPARATE.

Fr_Chuck · May 13, 2009, 12:26 PM

First why do only 5 people know ? Are you not living a open honest life style.

But even if this was a man/women relationship you don't ask the boss out ever.

liz28 · May 13, 2009, 12:42 PM

Yes if the two of you get together people will talk and rumors will start. If you can't take rumors then don't do it. If you have tough skin then who really cares what people say? I don't and wouldn't. Before you act on this fondness for her know the pros and cons of putting yourself out there because the outcome might not be what you want.