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Justwantfair · May 4, 2009, 10:16 AM

No contact is not about getting your girlfriend back.

There isn't anything less attractive then an obsessed, clingy and desperate boyfriend.

1 month doesn't ever equal 6 years.

Cry about your loss, but let her go. You need to focus on you.

colonel7 · May 4, 2009, 10:45 AM

Umm she was the clingy one. Well we where both. An I'm not desperate. I'm giving her time

liz28 · May 4, 2009, 10:59 AM

Stop giving her time and stop waiting for her to come around. Time and life will only pass you by.

Move on and take it day by day. Each day your getting stronger and hopefully your way of thinking will change.

colonel7 · May 4, 2009, 01:03 PM

OK your right.. an I'm, I'm doing stuff for me now. It does feel good, but I also want that feeling of being loved by somebody.. I'm 31, all my friends have there wife's or gfs, so they don't go out to bars an try to meet woman, I so skeptic on meeting woman online, though I did meet my current ex on Facebook, but I did know her from high school.. well I justed talked to one of her exs.. he said he could tell me storys about her, I don't know if that's jealousy or not, he's currently married so I don't know if he's got an axe to grind or what.. but in anycase he talks to her parents almost everyday. He's there mailman.. an like me now that I just lost my job at the post office.. ughh got more time to think about things... I'm wondering if I even want her back now, but that stuff he said about her is when she was young in her early 20s... stuff just gets more confusing everyday

colonel7 · May 4, 2009, 01:07 PM

By the way that's a picture of me, I cut her out of it haha

Justwantfair · May 4, 2009, 01:12 PM

You are making things confusing, they really aren't.

Is this your first real relationship?

I can tell you when you are planning a lifetime with someone when you can't make it past one month, there isn't much hope for a lifetime. You want to feel like this for the rest of your life?

Time for you.

colonel7 · May 4, 2009, 01:18 PM

Oh I understand that, an no this is about my 20th, I've dated girls that cheated on me, girls that did drugs behind my back.. normal girls crazy girls.. but everyone had there own little thing about them.. this one was different, there was that connection, like true love at first sight... I mean the first date I was like I could marry this one, she does have some problems with her hormons, an she does get bad migranes, where she does have to give herself a shot when it gets bad.. well you guys are mostly right.. I do have to try an stop thinking of her.. but to tell you the truth most guys do think of there exs a lot

Justwantfair · May 4, 2009, 01:21 PM

I know plenty of great guys, that are great on the surface, it isn't until you see them drink, see their behaviors that happen when you really know someone.

One month is long enough for infatution and caring, but it is not long enough to know someone. You are hanging on too tight.

liz28 · May 4, 2009, 01:25 PM

You don't look 31 which is a good thing.

I can understand you wanting to have someone in your life especially when everyone around you have someone. But know there is someone out there for everyone and when your looking for someone your never find her but when you aren't looking for her you will find her. It sounds weird but it is true.

So relax and take it one day at time.

colonel7 · May 4, 2009, 01:41 PM

Thank you for the complimant ;) Ive heard that to. My dad just told me that. I'm going to do my best not to think of her. Going to not an look at my phone every 5 minutes to see if she txtd me. ( we never in one month talked on the phone weird ) but will avoid to contact her too

liz28 · May 4, 2009, 01:56 PM

That is your best option and the right thing to do.

colonel7 · May 4, 2009, 07:02 PM

What do I do if she contacts me? I mean I do want her back. But don't want this to happen again.

colonel7 · May 4, 2009, 08:33 PM

Well my dumbass did a drive by at her house. An she already has somebody else stayn over. So I guess everybody was right. Sorry to waste all your guys time. Ughhh. Can anything ever go right for me?

liz28 · May 5, 2009, 06:15 AM

Your dumpa$$ better not drive by her house anymore. No more torturing yourself over her. No more worrying about and when she is going give you that magican call and tell you everything you want to hear.

You did something stupid. Now learn from it and move on. Time to start healing yourself. Listen to the songs in my signature. Watch some comedy. Do you play video games? Play some because I play them to keep my mind off things. Don't beat yourself up because your friends have someone because one day your going find someone for you but you won't find her if your still stuck over your ex.

HistorianChick · May 5, 2009, 06:24 AM

Ok. I'm going to pull out the tried and true "big guns."

You ready?

Remember in the movie Home Alone, where Kevin McAllister was horribly afraid of the robbers? There's one point where he realized that it was HIS house and that HE was going to defend it. You following me?

Well, he decided that he was done being scared, ran outside and yelled, "I'M NOT AFRAID ANYMORE! You hear me?? I said, I"M NOT AFRAID ANYMORE!"

It was a conscious choice of a little boy to defend his home against attackers.

YOU MUST MAKE THIS CHOICE.

You MUST decide that you're done with this, that you're going to defend YOUR heart against attack, and you're GOING to move on. NOTHING else will work.

It's YOUR decision.

Say with Kevin, "I'm not afraid anymore!"

Take back your life, man.

colonel7 · May 5, 2009, 06:56 AM

I am. I woke up today feeling used. Played "give you he'll". I know realize that it wasn't meant to be. She used me but I'm better than giving her another minute of my life. Shell get what she deserves. An I hope that it comes soon to realize it was her loss. I'm done with her. Every thought of her is bad

liz28 · May 5, 2009, 07:13 AM

I am glad to hear that you realize what you realize. Again take it day by day and once you get over her you going say I can't believe I was stuck on her. Believe me I have been there.

colonel7 · May 5, 2009, 07:31 AM

I know now that it's was way to fast, an now I can move on. I'm at the poker room at my local casino. They're like my support group. Already have a cute girl asking me if I want to go get a coffee or something. Just to talk. I think I should. What do you guys think? To soon?

Justwantfair · May 5, 2009, 07:44 AM

I am thinking I want to be there playing... oh wait, that isn't what you asked. People are always nice to talk to.

Just remember to take your time, there is not a rush when you are looking for greatness. Plus, if she is sitting at the poker table with you then how can you go wrong ;) Nothing better than a lady that can play!

colonel7 · May 5, 2009, 09:36 AM

Yeah. This is my new job. I'm a semi pro poker player. She is a novice an is asking for me to teach her. I think I might do it's nice to have something in common an she seems genuanlly interested. I'm not going to rush this time. An I can only hope the ex comes crawling back. That's when I will just ignore her. Send her packing like the little rat she is! You people are great an helpful! I will never forget this, an how much you helped. I will always post on this every day to let you know my situation! For real I've never meet a better group of people that care for a total stranger. An can take me in like I'm one of them.