[angymama71]

Hi! My name is Angela. I was born Nov. 16, 1971. My father died in 1978 and recently found out he was not my biological father. I had met his family in 1997 for the 1st time and a few months back my mother admitted to me that he was not my real father. Now I feel TERRIBLE AND EMBARRASSED! My mom doesn't know my real father's last name. She thought she knew the high school he attended but we looked at so many year books and he was not in any. I feel like I just want to give up. It's bad enough the family I thought I was a part of doesn't have any idea what's going on, then to know I can't even locate this person really angers me but hurts me at the same time. :( I just feel so lost right now. This person lost out on 37 years of my life. Apparently, he thought I was his daughter but since my mom was only 14 when she had me, she made an immature and foolish choice to tell him I was someone else's daughter. So now I wonder if he may be thinking about me and doesn't know my last name. He knows my first name. Any advice on what to do about this. I would really like to meet him. Help me please:(

[Fr_Chuck]

Of course since your mom was 14 the other person raped her in all parts of the US and Canada. So that may have been one issue.

But I would assume that the man who was raising you at the time, was your "father" maybe not the person who caused you to be born,

But I have found out you can not make up or relive any of the lost years. But since your mom told him you were someone else's most likely he never tought about you again.

But to be honest, you mom most likely knows who he really is, she seems to have talked and keep track of him for over 9 moths at least, so she would have known his name, It sounds like you mom most likely knows a lot more than she is saying.

So you can ask her again, start asking all of the other family members, grandparents, aunts uncles, what they know.

In the end, remember you want to meet him, he may not want to meet you, he may have a new family that may not want to know about a long lost daughter.

But why are you feeling lost, because a man who had sex with your mom, has never meet you ? Or that your mom lied to him, and lied to you.

With only a first name of a man who does not know he is the father, and will not be looking, there is no way to find this person unless someone gives you the full name

[Clough]

Hi, Angela!

Greetings and WELCOME to the site! I just moved your question that you had posted in Introductions to this forum topic area so that it will get the most exposure to those who are best able to answer it. Introductions is for people to introduce themselves and we try to not ask questions there.

I do note that you've already received one, fine answer while your question was in Introductions.

It can be a little confusing when first learning how to use this site! Your question will get noticed much more in this forum topic area.

We would appreciate it if you would return to Introductions sometime to tell us a little about yourself though, if you would be willing to do that.

Thanks!