[codyB]

Ok so I've been dating this girl samantha for going on 6 months, and I'm the kind of person who gets attached, and falls hard. I do everything in my power for her, I drive her everywhere, and buy her everything. I write her cute little letters and remind her she's perfect without even trying. We spend a lot of time together, and I've never seen her this happy. I don't want to seem obsessed since we hang out a lot, its just I love every second of being with her, and I thought she wanted the same. Lately she's been giving me mixed signals, and even wants a break. So as hard as this is for me, I have barely been texting her, and I wait for her to talk to me. Its even harder because we've had so many fun times and memories that I wouldn't trade for the world. I know 6 months isn't super long, but I need her in my life, and this break is tearing me apart. I always think about her, and look at my phone all the time to see if she texted. The only reason I'm scared about all of this is because the break came out of nowhere, and I was just kissing her 2 days ago, why in the world would she want this? Please help.

Cody,

[I wish]

If that's what she needs, then that's what she needs. If you say you love her so much, then respect her wishes. When she figures it all out, she will come back to her.

Don't contact her if she doesn't want you to, otherwise, it will just give her pressure and it will push her away. Be patient.

[kctiger]

You have completely built your life around her, and that isn't healthy, period. What you had was not a relationship, it was a dependence, and you really need to work on not being so clingy and dependent upon another for happiness. It is great that you are such a fantastic guy, but you have to have balance in a relationship, and clearly, there was none in this one.

[Romefalls19]

Get a hobby and give her the space she asked for.

[Sara Piemontese]

I'm that type of person too. I get really attached and fall very hard when it's over. I've been through that twice. If it was meant to be it will happen fosho. Just keep your head up darling, && if it doesn't work out then you have to move on. Trust me things will get better. Maybe not now but later. She will come through, You just have to wait and be patient. Heartaches suck. Just stay strong. There is TONS of fish in the sea. :]

[artlady]

Believe it or not Cody some people don't like to be put on a pedestal and adored.

I find this particularly true of young women.

For some odd reason,they do not see it as manly.

Hence,the old expression*nice guys finish last*.

When women are older they begin to see things differently.

Don't stop being a nice nice but also know that clingy or needy is very unattractive.

[codyB]

I'm that type of person too. I get really attached and fall very hard when it's over. I've been through that twice. If it was ment to be it will happen fosho. Just keep your head up darling, && if it doesn't work out then you have to move on. Trust me things will get better. Maybe not now but later. She will come through, You just have to wait and be patient. Heartaches suck. Just stay strong. There is TONS of fish in the sea. :]

Thank you, its just I know I seem depending to her, and I probably am, that's my problem. I can't help that I feel the need to want to talk to her a lot, its just she makes it seem like she enjoys our relationship just as much as I do. So its hard if she isn't always telling me her true feelings. And its funny because in my point of view I've been everything she could want, but I never knew she needed space, because she would also invite me over and want to go to movies, and dinner and everything. So feel its unfair to me for her to lead me on and write a letter that tells me how much she really loves me, and then 8 days later after easter do this to me. I'm on this website because I'm scared of losing her. And I do have other hobbies and friends to be around, its just I'm stuck in that depressed mood, and tend to listen to music, and watch shows that make me feel worse. I'm trying my very best to give her what she wants, I barely have been talking to her the past 3 days. I just pray to god, she misses me.

[codyB]

Believe it or not Cody some people don't like to be put on a pedestal and adored.

I find this particularly true of young women.

For some odd reason,they do not see it as manly.

Hence,the old expression*nice guys finish last*.

When women are older they begin to see things differently.

Don't stop being a nice nice but also know that clingy or needy is very unattractive.

That's true, and I just have to stop being clingy or needy, or dependent. I just have troubles with doing other things in the mean time, because I catch myself thinking about her, and wondering if time and giving her space will do anything.

[codyB]

Get a hobby and give her the space she asked for.

I have hobbies, I love skating and I'm a sponsored skateboarder, but the reason its hard to do other things is because a couple days before this "break" or giving her time. She even writes on my skateboard the date we starting going out. This whole thing is hard for me, because she's said so many things lately that would show me she wants me in her life, and hopefully future. So its confusing, its like saying "I love you and you mean everything to me, and then all of a sudden just wanting it to end.

[alana1xxx]

As one poster on here says " never let a person be a priority in your life, while allowing them to make you an option in theirs" you do not need her you might think like that now because you are in love with her but that will change in time for the meantime I think you are doing well because you were so kind to her it looks as though she has taken you for granted and is bored.

My advice: don't text or call her let her do her own thing for a while I know this is easier said then done but believe me it will pay off

Let her get in contact with you first and when/if she does do not talk about how low you are feeling or how much you miss her talk about anything but, and please don't do the opposite either and start boasting that you have never been better! (that won't help)

Keep yourself busy get your mates around relax and have fun, I'm guessing your only young so you shouldn't be sitting and moping around the house it might hurt now but it is true what they say "time is a great healer"

Finally have patience it will all work itself out mark my words!

Good luck :)

[codyB]

as one poster on here says " never let a person be a priority in your life, while allowing them to make you an option in theirs" you do not need her you might think like that now because you are in love with her but that will change in time for the meantime I think you are doing well because you were so kind to her it looks as though she has taken you for granted and is bored.

My advice: dont text or call her let her do her own thing for a while I know this is easier said then done but believe me it will pay off

let her get in contact with you first and when/if she does do not talk about how low you are feeling or how much you miss her talk about anything but, and please dont do the opposite either and start boasting that you have never been better! (that wont help)

Keep yourself busy get your mates around relax and have fun, im guessing your only young so you shouldnt be sitting and moping around the house it might hurt now but it is true what they say "time is a great healer"

Finally have patience it will all work itself out mark my words!

Good luck :)

Thanks for the luck, and again your right with all of this, same as everyone else. It just helps hearing advice and talking about it, rather then keep it in. And that is very true about the "taken for granted" because I've done so much for her, and I don't think she knows how hard I try. I spend way too much money. But should I text her back if she texts me first? Or should I just ignore it, and see if it effects her?

[artlady]

Thats true, and I just have to stop being clingy or needy, or dependent. I just have troubles with doing other things in the mean time, because I catch myself thinking about her, and wondering if time and giving her space will do anything.

I would ask her very plainly to be upfront with you and not just tell you something to ease your feelings.

Tell her if there is no chance of getting back ,you understand but if she is using space as an excuse,you deserve to know the truth,so you can move on with your life.

Out of respect,it is the least she owes you.

[codyB]

That's what I would tell her, like I told her she can tell me anything because I would never judge her. I mean I told her things I've never told anyone, and she's done the same, and I feel that's something special to me. Its just hard guessing what she wants if she doesn't always tell me her true feelings. Because if I have so much fun with her, and see her smile, and laugh, and see her so happy, then I just don't see what's wrong. Because I've never cheated or done something bad towards her, and I just feel isn't that what someone would want? Someone that's there for you, I know I might not be the hottest, best, coolest guy in the world, but I try my best for her, doesn't that count?

[kctiger]

Feelings change, sometimes without an explanation. It isn't your fault, it isn't her fault, it is just life. How good you were as a boyfriend doesn't matter. What matters is how you deal with your feelings now that hers have obviously changed.

[codyB]

In this case, I feel that she's scared of things, and she's told me many times she has a big decision to make, and she doesn't know what to do, so the last thing she wanted was space, and I'm giving that to her. Even her mom and friends think I'm a great guy , and that she's lucky to have me, but why doesn't she see that. Is it that she's scared to be happy? Or that she lied to me from the beginning about her feelings towards me?

[artlady]

Thats what I would tell her, like I told her she can tell me anything because I would never judge her. I mean I told her things i've never told anyone, and she's done the same, and I feel thats something special to me. Its just hard guessing what she wants if she doesn't always tell me her true feelings. Because if I have so much fun with her, and see her smile, and laugh, and see her so happy, then I just don't see whats wrong. Because i've never cheated or done something bad towards her, and I just feel isn't that what someone would want? someone thats there for you, I know I might not be the hottest, best, coolest guy in the world, but I try my best for her, doesn't that count?

Being a good guy counts for everything.

Even the greatest guy gets dumped.Sad to say.

I have heard people regret letting someone go and say to them self,sometimes many years down the road* why did I do that,he/she was the nicest person in the world*.

Maybe with space and time she will see that you are the guy for her but the waiting is painful,I know.

[kctiger]

I am going to be flat out honest: if she wanted to be with you, she would. I was a GREAT guy to my ex, but in the end her feelings changed. It sucked, and I mean sucked big time, but it is what it is. You can try and keep looking for answers that probably won't get answered, or you can accept that in reality, she knows she doesn't want to be with you right now. Sorry.

[codyB]

Don't be sorry, its just I have a hard time accepting things, and what's weird is that were still dating now, and the break was to give her time and space to be alone, the decision she's thinking about is if she wants a relationship at this moment or not, and in my case I don't know if that means she never would want to get back together after or she just wants me out of her life.

[talaniman]

Sorry guy, but your own inability to balance your life, and cope with your feelings in a responsible way, is making you a love slave.

She breaks up with you, and gets the benefits of a boyfriend, whenever she pleases. Not healthy or good.

Stand up for yourself, and ask her what's up, and if she can't tell you disappear from her life, and get your own.

No more excuses, false hope, wishful thinking, or punk behavior.