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    ercdcarson's Avatar
    ercdcarson Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 10, 2006, 01:28 PM
    Worried Mom
    My daughter is dating a guy from another state. He comes here on week ends and she talks to him all the time on the phone. He doesn't have a cell but uses his mothers. When he comes here she pays for everything but denies it when I ask her. She says he pays but I know for sure she does. She is going to visit him in a few weeks and help him move here. Should I be worried or should I just leave her alone? She is 23,he is 26. She just moved out on her own. She was going to school but isn't going this fall , says she will go back next semester. He isn't going to school and says he is going to work for a friend when he gets here. I have tried to talk to her about her paying for everything but she lies and says she doesn't. She does because I am on her checking acct. She flew him here one weekend and now she is flying there, again she pays. Should I just stay out of it?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Sep 10, 2006, 02:04 PM
    First of all you haven't said how old is your daughter or if she lives with you and does she work, or attend school? More info because if she is on her own then stay out of it.
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
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    #3

    Sep 10, 2006, 05:16 PM
    How old is your daughter? How about the guy? Does he seem like a decent, respectable guy? One you'd like to have for a son-in-law and as the father of your grandchildren? If yes, then I'd just leave her alone. If no, then I'd be worried. It's hard to answer your question on the information you've provided. So far, the only thng that seems questionable to me is his level of fiancial stability, if in fact he has to use his mother's cell phone to call your daughter and your daughter has to pay for everything when they go out. If they're going dutch that's one thing, but if she's footing the entier bill then that could be cause for concern.
    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
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    #4

    Sep 10, 2006, 05:17 PM
    Yes - how old is he/she??

    Is she gulible? Nieve? Doormat potential?

    Is he bad news? Drinks?

    We need more info on him? Does she have a degree? Him?

    Lots more info please
    phillysteakandcheese's Avatar
    phillysteakandcheese Posts: 973, Reputation: 356
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    #5

    Sep 10, 2006, 05:45 PM
    You certainly do have cause for concern.

    Talk to her. Maybe you don't have the full picture of who this guy is and what his history and plans are.
    mysticque's Avatar
    mysticque Posts: 95, Reputation: -7
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    #6

    Sep 11, 2006, 07:49 PM
    I'd be a little concern for her. Unless you are very familiar with the boy. But I might not want it confrontational... a little casual might be easier. Don't pepper her with questions. She's old enough on her own. I'm sure you're very concern for her safety. But t would be wiser to go sideways with her. And maybe you could do more research about this boy or invite them both to dinner? If you can choke that up?

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