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mudweiser · Apr 10, 2009, 10:15 AM

Hit me in the head, type your stern comments, because I made a boo-boo.

My ex husband, Sam, and I had intercourse when I saw him. We've always had a great sexual chemistry and now that we're not together there's like this big draw to him.

God I feel so stupid. I'll keep it in my pants next time guys.

Most people would've hidden this little bit of information, but I feel that I should be honest to you guys about what I'm going through- hope you understand :(

Sarah

Ren6 · Apr 10, 2009, 10:21 AM

Originally Posted by mudweiser

Hit me in the head, type your stern comments, because I made a boo-boo.

My ex husband, Sam, and I had intercourse when I saw him. We've always had a great sexual chemistry and now that we're not together there's like this big draw to him.

God I feel so stupid. I'll keep it in my pants next time guys.

Most people would've hidden this little bit of information, but I feel that I should be honest to you guys about what I'm going through- hope you understand :(

Sarah

Is he married? Or involved with somebody?

JudyKayTee · Apr 10, 2009, 10:24 AM

Originally Posted by Ren6

Is he married?

Did you read the whole thread?

To Sarah - I'm going to get beat up here but I don't think that's all that terrible. You're two consenting adults. The sex was good. The relationship was bad. The nights get long and lonely. There's a pull.

Nobody is cheating on anybody. Have sex with him, just don't get pulled back into a relationship.

Here's the part where everybody beats me up, I'm afraid!

mudweiser · Apr 10, 2009, 10:27 AM

Originally Posted by Ren6

Is he married? Or involved with somebody?

Lol silly. Sam is my husband- the one I'm leaving...

Sarah

artlady · Apr 10, 2009, 10:28 AM

You are only human my dear,don't beat yourself up.
Try to have a realistic plan of action.If seeing him is going to make you backtrack ten steps than know your vulnerabilities and be prepared.Face him with the attitude that ,I can resist his charms,I am strong,I can do what I came here to do.
Just because counseling was a flop one time,doesn't mean that it will always be.
Maybe you two could still benefit from it as long as you live separate while going.
Many churches offer free counseling and it is not about religion or faith ,they are trained to help with communication,fair fighting,all the tools that people need to get through tough times.
We are all rooting for you.You need to do the same and don't worry what anyone thinks.Its what you think that matters most.

Ren6 · Apr 10, 2009, 10:29 AM

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

Did you read the whole thread?

To Sarah - I'm going to get beat up here but I don't think that's all that terrible. You're two consenting adults. The sex was good. The relationship was bad. The nights get long and lonely. There's a pull.

Nobody is cheating on anybody. Have sex with him, just don't get pulled back into a relationship.

Here's the part where everybody beats me up, I'm afraid!

No need to be snarky. I have been reading this thread- if I missed a detail, I apologize to the former Mrs. S.

Ren6 · Apr 10, 2009, 10:30 AM

Originally Posted by Ren6

No need to be snarky. I have been reading this thread- if I missed a detail, I apologize to the former Mrs. S.

Sorry, LOL! I thought you were speaking of a previous ex!

mudweiser · Apr 18, 2009, 12:58 PM

Hmm.. I just saw him for a quick min. The whole time was horrible. He told me to get off the computer and get some "real" friends.

He still gets to me, I'm so angry with him for actually saying that and I actually feel even bad for being on a lot.

How do I get those little remarks that hurt so bad not to hurt?

One sad,
Sarah

artlady · Apr 18, 2009, 01:24 PM

Originally Posted by mudweiser

hmm.. I just saw him for a quick min. The whole time was horrible. He told me to get off the computer and get some "real" friends.

He still gets to me, I'm so angry with him for actually saying that and I actually feel even bad for being on a lot.

How do I get those little remarks that hurt so bad not to hurt?

One sad,
Sarah

I would have had a good comeback for him... Im going out tonight and INTEND TO DO JUST THAT (snap)

Honey,your still wrapped up in him so he's going to get to you.Know that you are doing what gets you through and if being here and helping others is assuaging your pain,screw him.. its better than going out and getting trashed and screwing around.
Just take his insults for what they are,a way to bring you down.Don't give him that much power. By the way I just took my pulse and I'M REAL!

mudweiser · Apr 18, 2009, 01:46 PM

My icky feeling is a little over. I got off and cried a little. I hate how he has this "power" over me. I really hate it. He can make me cry just like that [snap].

Thanks Art. I know you guys are real- either that or I'd be talking to some really good automated ask me helping computers.

Sarah

Alty · Apr 18, 2009, 02:02 PM

Sweetie I just found this thread.

You'll get through all of this, you're tougher then you give yourself credit for, and yes, you are smart.

Stick to your guns, be your own person, he's not in control anymore, you are. Don't let him push you around, he has no right to do that.

Now, stand up straight, chin up, shoulders back and repeat after me "I am strong, I am the master of me, I will not let others push me around, I will stand on my own, I will fight for what I want, I will win, I am woman, hear me roar!"

I had to throw that last bit in there, it always makes me giggle.

ROAR! :)

talaniman · Apr 18, 2009, 02:31 PM

Most times I tell people, not to have sex with people they are trying to get away from.

Hey we make mistakes, and as long as you can see it for what it is, a romp in the hay, and not let false hope creep into your brain, then your good to go.

Having said that, don't let that romp in the hay, soften your resolve not to have him control you.

Then I would have to give you some rather harsh advice, You understand.:eek:

mudweiser · Apr 18, 2009, 02:37 PM

Yes Sir, Tal!

P.S. I am no longer intimate with him- that was a one time thing. I found that if I keep doing that I will regress.

Thank you all for being here.

Sarah

liz28 · Apr 20, 2009, 11:16 AM

Mudweiser;1674953
P.S. I am no longer intimate with him- that was a one time thing. I found that if I keep doing that I will regress.

Thank you all for being here.

Sarah

Yes, don't repeat that mistake. Stay strong! I know you have needs but you can always invest in toys.:-)

liz28 · Apr 20, 2009, 11:48 AM

Comments on this post
88sunflower agrees: Toys? LOL don't we all have a tickle truck?? That's what I like to call mine.

Tickle truck? That's a new one. Your crazy 88Sunflower! Lol You learn something new everyday.

mudweiser · Apr 20, 2009, 11:49 AM

Thanks for the suggestion liz. You're a pal.

Sarah