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KMC6296 · Mar 31, 2009, 04:32 PM

My daughter is really having a tough time with her teacher. She really feels like she is being picked on! I feel like my daughter is in a no win situation because she continues to be seated next to "problem kids". The teachers approach is to put a quiet kid (mine) next to one that acts up. The boy that sits near my daughter keeps pulling supplies out of her desk and then refuses to give them back, when she asks for them back she is yelled at in front of the class by the teacher for talking. What has me most upset is that she told my daughter today that she was disrupting the class and keeping her from teaching her assignment.

Sorry I'm venting... I am VERY frustrated overall with this class. The teacher is WASTING class time with nonsense. They watch a movie every day. Really every day. Last week they watched Pete's Dragon, 30 min. episodes of Little House on the Prairie 3 days and then the Page Master. None of these have anything to do with what they are supposed to be learning. I think my daughter has actually lost information this year! She is having trouble dividing because they don't work on multiplication tables, she is struggling in Spelling, mainly because we keeps moving the day of the test around. I have been trying to work something out with her since the beginning of the year. My daughter went from high honor roll every quarter last year, to not 1 honor roll at all. It's nuts! And, to make matters worse, I pay $ 435.00 per month for this.

Anyway... I need to get my daughters desk moved and I need help with how I should approach the teacher. I'm afraid I'm not objective anymore and don't want to cause a bigger problem.

Thanks!

hulk1371 · Mar 31, 2009, 05:40 PM

Every time I have had a problem with a teacher I have approached the teacher in private and spoke with him/her in a civilized manner and talked to her about the problem. Granted this very rarely works especially when the teacher thinks they know it all. But when the problem persists I take to to the principle and talk with him/her. I am civilized but stern and I let the principle know that the problem will be fixed or I will go higher. I have a 17 a 10 and a 3 year old and have been to the principle many times but have never had to take it higher. Mine are in public schools but you need to let the school know that you pay for education and will not stand for the problems that you are having with the school but still be respectful about it.

XOXOlove · Mar 31, 2009, 06:11 PM

When I was in third grade I had a very rude teacher who was very racist and would yell at me and give me detention all the time for the most stupid reasons! The class was mostly made up of black children and the teacher was black too. She would come up with the craziest ways to give white or mixed children detension.it damaged me socialy because I was a very quiet kid like your daughter. My dad talked to her about it several times and she would be extra phony and pretend to be nice. My dad ended up having the principal change my class because she kept coming up with more crazy exuses to give me detension. I think you should also change your daughter's class if her teacher continues to be this way after you speak to her. Otherwise your daughter isn't going to learn anything and she might end up being very aloof after getting yelled at repeatedly for something that wasn't her fault. If the teacher doesn't listen to you and continues to pick on your child, tell the principal or superintendent.

JoeCanada76 · Mar 31, 2009, 06:20 PM

If everything else fails. Maybe the only way to resolve the problem is by getting her a different teacher.

Fr_Chuck · Mar 31, 2009, 06:22 PM

I was always demanding and would go over the teachers head if I had to.

But in the end, I am not sure what moving the test day around has to do with that, and why instead of talking does she not tell the teacher her things taken by raising her hand.

Also are all kids doing bad in class, no one making the honor role?

KMC6296 · Apr 1, 2009, 12:12 PM

All of the kids are struggling in this class. I am room mom and shen I'm in the class, honestly, I have seen 1 boy crawling on the floor (this is who my daughter sits next to! ) and 2 boys were throwing paper airplanes. She did nothing! I had to take the airplanes away myself.

I spoke with the teacher this morning. She said that the problem is that the boy does not respect others personal apsce. Correct! She apologized for belittling my daughter and said it was because she yells at the boys a lot and does not want to seem like she doesn't discipline the girls. Crazy, huh? I told her that part of the problem is that the majority of the class does not have supplies and my daughter does, so they are asking her for paper, markers, etc. She said that my girl should have explained that to her. I do agree, but explained that she doesn't want to be a tattler and she really has no problem sharing and that she's not just talking.

So... her and I moved my daughter's desk. Which I am happy about. We are also looking at a different Christian school to possibly enroll her in next year. We have an appointment tomorrow and we are very excited! They have smaller class sizes (12 kids!), band, Spanish, art. They offer SO much more! 5 families are looking to move their kids to this school next year. I'm crossing my fingers that it's a good fit for my girl :)

KMC6296 · Apr 1, 2009, 01:09 PM

I think the problem with moving the test dates around is that they have a test 4 days per week. For example, their spelling test consists of 21 words and 6 vocabulary. She had words this week like appreciate, Michigan, and bouquet. She had straight for a vocabulary word with a definition of - a body of water that connects 2 larger bodies of water and she also had artificial with a definition of imitation, not real. They never use these words in sentence, she never goes over any rules so it ends up being memorization. If they don't get every word of the definition, it is marked wrong. We work with our daughter a lot at home. This teaches does not teach. We have to use the words in sentences at home. The last 3 months have been dedicated to the ACSI speech meet which consisted of her having to memorize a fable, poem and bible verse. This was in addition to her regular homework and tests. I think it's unfair that she has planned and prepared herself for the Monday morning spelling test. Shouldn't the teacher do the same? Then we're told the spelling test is moved to Thursday. Ok, so then she shows up on Wednesday for the speech meet run through and no, now it's the spelling test. It's a recipe for failure! This is SO much information for these kids. I have to refresh my daughter in the morning before the test so she's ready. How can we do that when we never really know when the test will be? I can't show up to work and decide to move deadlines around and insist that my co-workers jump through hoops because I don't have a grip on anything. Kids need structure.

JoeCanada76 · Apr 1, 2009, 05:34 PM

It sounds like progress was made. Good for you. Best wishes for future classes and school.

Joe

DoulaLC · Apr 2, 2009, 04:12 PM

I am guessing this is third grade and I'm still amazed that the teacher has gotten away with showing movies everyday. Movies that don't appear to have anything to do with the curriculum. I could see a short one here or there if she tied it into a lesson perhaps.

Do you know if the head of the school is aware of this? If not, they should be made aware. Speaking to the head about it may at least allow your daughter, and the other children, to have more actual learning time in the day.

I'm glad to hear you have made some progress... I truly hope that more will be yet to come.

9110024 · Apr 2, 2009, 04:20 PM

You should talk with the teacher about the situation. No not try to get into an argument with her because that will not solve anything. Also I believe that you shoulld go to the principal about her only showing movies to the kids especially since you are paying for her education.

KMC6296 · May 12, 2009, 01:03 PM

We did indeed make progress! We talked to the principal who just kind of stuck up for the teacher. We were not the first parents to complain. The principal said that next year would be better with a more disciplined teacher (blah, blah, blah). So, we pulled my daughter out, another family pulled their daughter out too and we took our girls over to another Christian school. So far, so good! The 4th grade teacher is FANTASTIC! The principal seems to be so genuinely kind and interested and understanding. And, I sat in the 5th grade class 3 times just to make sure we felt good about our decision to move. We are all very, very happy with the change. We are truly blessed to have found such an awesome group of people and such caring teachers!

DoulaLC · May 12, 2009, 01:14 PM

So glad to hear it has been resolved... at least for a few of the children. It is unfortunate it took changing schools to do so however. I hope next year that teacher will be put on review and observed more frequently so that the principal can be truly aware firsthand of what goes on in the classroom.

I hope your daughter is enjoying the rest of her school year and looking forward to next year!

KMC6296 · May 12, 2009, 01:18 PM

Thanks for the kind words. It is sad that this is what it took, but we all feel so less stressed and my daughter is in a very nurturing environment that really encourages good study habits and trying to do your best. We really like the teacher and the schools approach. I think this ended up being a really good change for my girl! :)

claireiopia · Nov 7, 2009, 06:17 PM

I would talk to your child's teacher and ask her why she's doing this. About your child not learning anything, I would talk to your schools principal, if he/she refuses to do anything, I would take her out of that school.

Aprilmay12 · Jan 7, 2010, 06:43 PM

I think you need to step up and be Big Bad Mama Bear. Your story makes me so mad probably because as a child this happened to me. I had a few elementary school teachers who were just plain pathetic and couldn't handle a classroom let alone teach a damn thing. I was a shy and nice little girl but treated unfairly. My mother is also a very nice person but boy did she "handle" that situation. She went in with a firm "I mean business" attitude and didn't take any crap. You are paying this teacher's salary, I think you can be as objective as you want. My mom and I both now work in the public school system, and let me tell you, you should be very firm and even demanding because you won't be taken seriously if you're not.

It's very disappointing to hear that there are still teachers like that, I'm sorry. Hopefully your daughter has a better experience next year, and best of luck to you!