[Mopar Dewd]

All right, long story short... Last year my friend's younger sister and I got pretty close. We would talk every other night if not every night on the phone and I would even drive to her college (2 hours away) to hit a movie and hang out. Well eventually I did ask her to go out on an official date, but she said she dind't know what she wanted, but just wanted to stay friends...

Like I said that was last year and we have drifted apart.. never even talked that much at all during the spring or summer...

Ok, here's my situation, Now I've met someone down here, and she obviously likes me and we've gone out on a couple dates and had a great time, I honestly think she's amazing and have never found another person with as much in common with me as she is... Well my friends sister doesn't know about this girl, (in fact hardly no one knows yet). I want to tell her just so she knows but Really not sure how to go about it... I'd like to let her know in case she's having second thoughts and pluss I don't want to hurt her feelings.. sounds weird I know, but any advice would be acceptable...

[Wildcat21]

I wouldn't tell. Let her find out on her own. And don't worry about your friends sister - let her sort out her feelings and get back to you. Leave her alone for now. No attention - none - you expressed how you feel and she shot you down.

Just enjoy this new woman - go slow - please - there is no rush.

I hghly suggest NOT talking with someone every night over every other night - you will suffocate them - give the mspace.

There is no reason to talk to them so much at all early on- save it for dates.

I really think the first gal you went into FRIEND ZONE because you spoke to her way too much too early on. You need to be a busy guy. Every here of hard to get? Challenge?

[Here_To_Help- Jon]

Its not weird at all... if she is a "friend" - and it sounds like she established that level of relationship - then this is good, happy news that you would share with any friend.. however - it sounds like you haven't spoken in a while... so suddenly re-inititiating contact would be a little strange. If your friend knows... his sister will eventually know. Focus on your new relationship and enjoy it.

[Wildcat21]

Friends is a great place to start on a relationship. Believe me. You get all hot and heavy early and you WILL most likely crash and burn.

I can't strees the need to take it slow if you want a relationship. Let it develop. Take it slow. No need to communicate every day.

Wildcat knows. Been there, done that.

[Mopar Dewd]

Gotcha on all accounts... I have no intention of taking this new relationship fast and wreckless... In fact that's part of the reason I like her, most girls I know anymore seam to just jump into it... For once I'd like to have a real relationship with a strong foundation...

The main thing I'm worried about is my friends' sister's feelings, but your right, I'll just let her find out on her own... her brother doesn't know about my new friend yet, but I know he will here shortly...

[Wildcat21]

Don't go telling him just so you hope he tells her. Bad idea.

[Mopar Dewd]

Good point, I'm not even sure when it'll come up... So for the time being, I'm just going to take it one day at a time... Like you said, I asked her out and she turned me down... what other option do I have. Right now I can say that I'm truly happy with the way things are. :)

[Skell]

I really don't see a reason why you need to tell this other girl..
Just go about your business with the new girl and if / when she finds out then so be it.
You have done nothing wrong. You let your friends sister know how you feel and she didn't have the same feelings. No big deal. It happens.

Now you have found someone you like and are dating them. You haven't done anything wrong and I don't think you need to tell anyone.

It is your relationship and people can find out as you please.

So don't worry about what others think. Just what you think. And it seems you have a healthy attitude towards this new girls so enjoy the ride and GO SLOW!!

[s_cianci]

Why do you need to tell your friend's sister about this other girl? You made no promises or commitments to each other. She herself said she "didn't know what she wanted" and wanted to "just remain friends." Just go out and enjoy yourself and forget all about it! But don't rush into things. Be busy and mysterious. Make your dates "few but intense." Show her a wonderful time, then don't call her again for a couple of weeks. Spend the time doing things with yourself and others that you enjoy.

[chuff]

I don't understand why you feel you have to tell this other girl about your new interest? It sounds like you still have feelings for your friends sister. That or you want to make her jealous. Maybe I'm reading this wrong but I think you should figure out what you want, and who you want then pursue the girl(s).

[JoeCanada76]

I agree with wildcat. It is none of her business anyway. Your not really going out with this other girl. Why would you even worry about it. Why would you want her to know?

It is kind of weird. Leave it alone. Just go with the flow with the girl your seeing now.

Joe

[Mopar Dewd]

That makes sense... The reason I was thinking that way was because she keeps talking to me here online and I got a small feeling she likes me.. but I'm just going to go about my business and my life...

No need to make things more complicated...

Thanks for the advice guys! :)

[talaniman]

You owe nothing to anyone at this point so relax and see where things go.