[be-ed]

Lately I have pretty much given up on just about everything. I don't put effort into school anymore. I used to be almost 4.0 student but my grades have slipped way down and I'm worried about getting kicked out of college. I don't really know what exactly is causing all this. Recently I got engaged. It was arranged and I have no wish to be with this guy but nothing can be done about that now. I am getting married soon to a complete stranger that I already don't like. And I have to follow through it for the sake of my parents. Maybe that is the cause. But I don't get why I am giving up on everything. School, friends, and just life in general. I don't study for tests and just let my grades slip lower and lower and the worst part is that I don't really seem to care. My parents are always complaining about me, about one thing or another. I can't seem to get anything right. I don't know what to do. It seems like I am waiting for something or someone but don't know who or what.. I can't explain it. I am just so confused and tired of life. The thought of suicide has occurred to me more than once but I know I would never take such a drastic action but then I don't know what to do. It seems like my life is over and there is nothing to live for anymore. I have just given up on everything. I don't know what I am going to once I am married or how I am going to keep it working. I am always out of money and my parents don't help with that either. I can't seem to hold a job for more than a few weeks. I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't know how to get out of this or even how to start.. I have lost complete desire in everything that was once important to me.

[BIGBOPPER]

Hey there!
It sounds like you are depressed. You need to see a counselor, or a psychiatrist and get on a treatment program. Anytime you have thoughts of suicide, that is not normal. See if there are counseling services at your school, and if they can get you started on anti-depressants. You do not have to follow through on anything, as far as the marriage goes. Let your parents know that the arranged marriage is part of the problem.
A former co-worker, from Pakistan, married her arranged husband and decided that she did not like him, and waited until they got to America, where she proceeded to divorce him. You could do that.
Take care, and go see somebody as soon as possible.

[Clough]

Hi, be-ed!

BIGBOPPER does make some good suggestions above! However, I'm wondering, if the person that you're going to marry is a complete stranger, how do you know that you don't like him?

Thanks!