[MsMewiththat]

So
Here is a really good one that came my way today. I am not seeing this man any more so there is no need to tell me that I deserve better. I knew that for other reasons and moved on. Can't tell you how incredibly happy I am for the good sense that God gave me.
However, I want to hear from people. I want the opinion of all of you really smart opinionated people :) in regards to why someone would do this. Maybe it's simple maybe there is more to it that I am not seeing. So please give it to me... HERE IT GOES

August of 2006 I met a man that was in town on business from ATL. We spoke and had a drink together at a bar while I was waiting for some girlfriends to show up. We exchanged email addresses and left it at that. He came back to town several times and asked me to meet with him again. I declined until one day a couple months later I figured why not. We had a nice dinner, I went home. He came back a couple weeks later for a week we spent more time together. His trips were every couple of weeks for about a week each time. Then we started planning the in between trips to each other states and slowly got to know more about each other our families, children etc.

6 months later we were for all practical purposes seeing each other. This pattern continued through 2007. I never wanted to be in a long distance relationship, I need more than that. It was always a straing for me, the trust, the time etc. Early to mid 2008 things changed for me and I met someone here and figured I should cool this long distant relationship off as neither one of us were in a position to move. Okay so now here we are in 2009. We haven't seen each other in over a year and although we exchange texts and phone calls periodically, we talk about getting together, we haven't done it. We have told each other about different dating situations but no details, just that we have seen other people etc.
So today I get this text... haven't heard from him in a coupke of weeks and he says: "hey babe...just thinking about you...sorry I haven't been in touch with u i have been dealing with some life changing serious issues...will fill you in later when I get things verified"

I pressed and what he is referring to... is not what you would think. Illness, family illness,
Diagnosis... right? NO, one of the girls he has been seeing thinks she might be pregnant. Okay and if that is stupid enough, he goes on to say "Thanks for listening hun...now you know what's been on my shoulders...no the young lady that I have been seeing since 2004 wants to have my baby too... i figured she would've dumped me..."

I tried my best not to judge and not to preach, but the 40 year old in me just couldn't hold back... so after I expressed my concern for him and of him seeing more than one woman and having unprotected sex and how reckless, dishonest and immoral I think he is behaving and how incredibly thankful I am to God and any other power that has kept him from me this past year while he take his fall from grace and good sense. That I can't fully understand why he would take it upon himself to tell me something that isn't confirmed yet, not only that why tell me at all, it only makes me regret being a part of his sick self fishness. If we haven't spoken in a while why are you telling me this now?

So Askmehelp desk... Tell me what you think...


WHY the sudden text?

[Romefalls19]

GARBAGE! Exactly what he and that text are.

[liz28]

You know what I realize? If you sit around thinking about why people do what they do or question their motives your be thinking and thinking until you get brain freeze. So I don't even question or wonder why people do the things they do because the list can be endless. And to add sometimes the person that is doing the thing you question can't even give you an answer because they don't even know why they do what they do.

Just leave him alone and go on with your life.

[artlady]

Maybe he was angry that you dropped him and he had to get back to you to let you know he still has many irons in the fire.
Essentially,he called to stroke his own ego.
Maybe you don't want him but he has two babes that want to hook up.
Blatant chauvinistic bragging.One step up from what teen-age boys do in the locker room.
Glad you weren't added to his list of prospective Mom's.:p

[MsMewiththat]

All very good answers thank you. GARBAGE is an accurate description of this character. I didn't take him for this type. He's a nerd type. Really it does leave me to think my reaction was meant to stroke the ego. Hate that I participated.

[MsMewiththat]

I really, really, thought he was going to say he had a positive colon screening or something that really classifies as "some life changing serious issues". Yuck!

[TrueFaith]

God has nothing to do with this. In my view.. as I have no faith in that but whatever gets you from day to day I guess.


Humans.. people.. you can't think or try and understand why others do what they do. Because you will never know.. no one knows what's going on in other peoples heads..

Hell no one knows what's going on in there OWN heads!. so why would you even attempt to try and fathom what other people would do?

It is a waist of time. All you can go on is how there actions make you feel..

If there actions make you feel bad.. or upset.. then leave them..
If they make you feel good.. keep them.
It is as simple as that.

True they won't be able to do it all the time. But you have to know.. where to draw the line
And I think with this.. guy you should draw that line and leave him alone.

And try to stop thinking about others. And why they do there things and worrie about yourself.

Wish you all the best

[talaniman]

The guy was enjoying his life, and dating around, and that includes you too. Since you pressed him he told you what's up with him. That simple.