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20anonymous08 · Mar 6, 2009, 04:34 PM

Okay so I am and have always been an emotional person. I get moody... angry for no reason and take it out on my family. Then of course there is the sensitivity! It is driving me crazy! Here is a little history about me... I was an overweight teen and was harassed and bullied throughout my school years. It really took a toll on me... I have virtually no self esteem. I have arthritis so I that causes me pain and of course self consciousness. Well the reason I'm on here writing is because of my emotions I am sick of them! The main one I have questions about is - me crying. I can cry at the drop of a hat. When I'm sad - I cry, When I get so mad - I cry... when I am so angry - I cry.

For example - today at work - I was told I was doing something wrong... and I was so angry and arguing with my co-worker... I was trying to explain what I was doing and how I was trained to do it that way... all the while I'm crying! This is ridiculous! I hate it I am so angry with myself! Why the hell am I like this? Ughhh. Anytime I try to stand up for myself or 'tell someone off' (I don't know how else to put it) I bust out in tears. It makes me sick!! I cannot 'defend' myself or 'fight back' without crying. I hope I have explained this enough. I hate it... I want to come off as a tough person who can take care of herself but how can anyone take me serious when I'm crying over stuff like this? PLEASE HELP!!

MiSSsy111222 · Mar 8, 2009, 01:27 PM

Are you male or female. Sorry I couldn't tell from your post. If your female it could be related to periods. PMS. However it sounds to me like your stresed. Your past experience with people can be connected to why you are defensive with your cow worker.

You admit yourself you have low self esteem. Have you tried working on this? Is there anything you really like to do? Hobbies, groups that you can join? This will rebuild your confidence and self esteem.

You also sound stressed, try to treat yourself, be kind to yourself.

toolguyny · Mar 8, 2009, 08:30 PM

Sounds relative to depression in my opinion. I have been on and off anti-depressants for the past 12 years and was finally told I just need to stay on them. I am a 38 year old gay man, and totally understand the crying thing. Just bust out bawling while driving for no reason at all, which then turns to anger and frustration because I can't control it. The anti-depressant meds take care of this, I might suggest you speak with your physician about it. There are many different drugs, some work for some people but not for others so it make take a bit if you do go that route to find the right combination/dosage to help you. Good luck to you.

starlite1 · Mar 9, 2009, 06:01 AM

It definitely sounds like depression. Are you seeking any kind of professional therapy? If not, perhaps it may be a good idea to do so. I am no stranger to low or no self esteem. I have lived with it all of my life, I am going on 40 years old. I too was teased in my youth and it really scarred me. My boyfriend who is so supportive tells me to try and have thicker skin in general and let the past go. I am in therapy and medication for depression and for BPD (borderline personality disorder) and it does help my crying spells. I really do suggest that you seek professional help and of course talk with us. We are all here to help.

Good luck.

margdav86 · Mar 12, 2009, 01:00 AM

I don't think you are depressed... I think you just have trouble controlling your emotions. Im a very emotional person myself, and I've realized that a lot of it is because I tend to sweat the small stuff. You just have to keep in mind that no one is going to approve of you 100% of the time.. not your boss, not your coworker, not your friend... there are always going to be little contentious situations that come up and you need just take them as a healthy balance between the good and bad.. because you can't have both, you know? Now what's making it unhealthy is the fact that you get so emotional over them. Maybe you need to have a good cry one of these days... just let it all out and wring yourself of those damn tears! Afterwards, just keep the positive thoughts alive.. look around you, smell the flowers, do yoga, listen to music, and read some poetry.

artlady · Mar 12, 2009, 03:25 AM

I think you may be experiencing an emotional breakdown ,a delayed reaction to the stress of your teen years.I think you should seek counseling.

People who are bullied have been known to suffer well after the event from P.T.S.D. Post traumatic Stress Disorder.

I am not a doctor but I have learned something on this subject due to a friend who's child had a similar problem.

Please seek help for this as there is very effective treatment out there and you will be able to get your life back.

Best of luck!