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confused_bp · Mar 2, 2009, 07:43 PM

Hi there... im 17,8 months pregnant and I have a boy friend. Before I fell pregnant we had sex at least 4 times a week now I don't want it and when I try to explain he makes me feel really bad for letting him down. I don't know what is wrong with me I've asked myself allot of things and none of them seem right.ive been told that I could be depressed because of the amount of stress I've been under during pregnancy. I love him 2 bits and I love being around him but he doesn't see it like that, he says that I'm not attracted any more but I honestly am. Is there any tips or help you could give me I really want to make things work. Thank you:(:confused:

neverme · Mar 2, 2009, 07:57 PM

Tell him he (I'm guessing) and you got in this situation, and when he has gone through what you are going through physically and emotionally he can come back and give you some insight, until such a time... patience is a virtue, and the key to paradise.

arnimal7 · Mar 2, 2009, 08:04 PM

Don't feel bad. A lot of women who are pregnant go through that, and 8 months is really pregnant. See, men don't understand that at all. Not to mention a young (17/18) year old male.

confused_bp · Mar 2, 2009, 08:06 PM

Hhhmmm... yes I know but in my head I feel like there is something more that is stopping me from wanting sex because I haven't wanted it all the way through pregnancy or is this normal or am I using the pregnancy as a excuse?

neverme · Mar 2, 2009, 08:08 PM

Maybe it's the fact that he's an ex drug dealer who goes out all night and doesn't respect you?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ip-324188.html

confused_bp · Mar 2, 2009, 08:09 PM

Maybe

neverme · Mar 2, 2009, 08:12 PM

Ah come on!!

This has to put some strain on your relationship.

Is there somewhere you can go until you have your baby?

You don't need to be overly stressing yourself in your last trimester (or at all during pregnancy).

It may give him some time to cop himself on, and one way or another you'll see his true colours.

confused_bp · Mar 2, 2009, 08:15 PM

Well this is the 1st time he has stayed out in a while and I know he's with friends but I still believe he will change but then on the other hand I kind of know that he won't but I want him to and that's what I'm waiting for

neverme · Mar 2, 2009, 08:19 PM

Great, wait around and put your new born child in this position.

This is the problem with kids taking on adult activities, such as sex, before their time, you have to be an adult now because your not just thinking of you. Your going to have a baby in about a month!

It's up to him to change. You waiting around will only tell him subconsciously that this behaviour is OK.

It's not, you BOTH got into this situation and he should be at home, supporting you. If not he is a ******. Period.

confused_bp · Mar 2, 2009, 08:23 PM

I'm a lot older in my mind than you think I've been through a lot of things and yes I understand that there is going to be a baby soon that is why I want advice so that I don't have to put my child through the stress I have been through I can't help the feelings that I have got for him

neverme · Mar 2, 2009, 08:28 PM

Well I am giving you sound advice.

Stop making excuses for this boy and take care of #1 and soon to be #1, believe me they will be! and give this guy a wide berth.

If he cares about your baby and you he will be at your door begging for forgiveness.

If not, then you've saved yourself and your child a lot of heartache.

I'm not saying this to be mean, I'm saying it because it needs to be said.

Romefalls19 · Mar 3, 2009, 11:18 AM

Get away from this guy, child services will be at YOUR door to take that child away because this guy is a drug dealer. If you aren't wise enough to get away from him, then I hope they come and take the child away it's better than being around a drug dealer

nikosmom · Mar 3, 2009, 12:00 PM

I think I missed the part where you said he's a drug dealer... but why would you want your baby around that nonsense?

As for the question posted here; not feeling the desire to have sex while you're pregnant is very normal. It can either go from one extreme to the other. Some women want it all the time and some don't want it at all. You're a person with feelings and he needs to realize that.

neverme · Mar 3, 2009, 12:26 PM

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ip-324188.html

Another post by her... more info! :D

Ren6 · Mar 3, 2009, 01:46 PM

Originally Posted by neverme

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ip-324188.html

Another post by her...more info! :D

Frankly, this link alone provides enough reason to not want to be sexual with him- plus, being eight months pregnant, you have to be getting a bit physically uncomfortable, period. Please get away from this guy. You don't need a paranoid, manipulative drug user around your baby.

neverme · Mar 3, 2009, 01:52 PM

Need to spread the rep Ren but... Exactly!. but I really don't think this girl wants real advice, I think she just wants someone to tell her it's OK, and it's not.

Justwantfair · Mar 3, 2009, 01:59 PM

Yesterday you were in college...

You don't sound as ready for all of this as you thought you were yesterday.

As far as the sex issue goes. Sex can be very uncomfortable and your body is going through a lot, it is normal to not be as in the mood while you are in your third trimester. It is not OK for him to pressure you into sex as he should be as supportive as he can. I went through 10 months. Of not being in the mood, and he was VERY supportive even though we were both so young. Don't think that you don't deserve someone respectful of your feelings and your body.

mandywebster97 · Mar 3, 2009, 02:50 PM

I read this whole page its ridiculous in a way. Sex was not the best idea considering your age but its done now and you are about to have a gorgeous child. Plus you don't need to have sex your already pregnant. Lets not add more stress than needed