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    18Ahunnie's Avatar
    18Ahunnie Posts: 48, Reputation: 7
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    #1

    Mar 2, 2009, 01:23 PM
    Orgasm- weird situation
    Has anybody experienced anything like this? I can have an orgasm by myself. Not while aving intercourse but with my finger during sex. It makes my man feel very unhelful seeing how only I can do it. It does not work if somebody else does it.

    Anyway to change that?
    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
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    #2

    Mar 2, 2009, 01:30 PM
    Your boyfriend isn't going to be able to know anything about your body that you don't tell him.

    Teach him what feels good and give him directions on how you like it.

    Every women is different and what may have worked for his last girlfriend may not work for you, show him how you like it.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #3

    Mar 2, 2009, 01:43 PM

    MOST women cannot orgasm from sex.

    That being said, you need to teach him how to please you. That means relinquishing a bit of the control for your orgasm. You may need to talk to you doctor about ways to learn how to do this.
    18Ahunnie's Avatar
    18Ahunnie Posts: 48, Reputation: 7
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    #4

    Mar 2, 2009, 02:27 PM

    You know he tries to do everything as I lead him the right way, but it still is no success in a sense that I don't get turned on that way. But I go crazy when him and I are together, but I can still only do it myself.
    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
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    #5

    Mar 2, 2009, 02:45 PM

    That isn't uncommon.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #6

    Mar 2, 2009, 03:17 PM

    Part of it is really just surrendering to the moment. Really.

    You HAVE to let go of control for it to happen.

    Just as an aside---how far we've come in 100 years! Men used to not CARE if their women enjoyed sex---now they feel like failures if they DON'T enjoy sex!
    18Ahunnie's Avatar
    18Ahunnie Posts: 48, Reputation: 7
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    #7

    Mar 2, 2009, 04:51 PM

    wow, really wow, I haven't thought of it that way, thank you for the help=)

    I thought I was the only one
    shyfoxie's Avatar
    shyfoxie Posts: 86, Reputation: 8
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    #8

    Mar 8, 2009, 11:19 PM

    Women are tricky creatures, and everyone is different. Here's an idea--try having him take you from behind, and reach his hand around and stimulate your . It seems to work pretty well with my guy, and he gets to feel all "mission accomplished"
    shyfoxie's Avatar
    shyfoxie Posts: 86, Reputation: 8
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    #9

    Mar 8, 2009, 11:20 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by shyfoxie View Post
    Women are tricky creatures, and everyone is different. Here's an idea--try having him take you from behind, and reach his hand around and stimulate your . It seems to work pretty well with my guy, and he gets to feel all "mission accomplished"
    I meant stimulate your
    shyfoxie's Avatar
    shyfoxie Posts: 86, Reputation: 8
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    #10

    Mar 8, 2009, 11:21 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by shyfoxie View Post
    I meant stimulate your
    Okay... this is a dumb word filter, how do you give advice with some perfectly good body part names blocked... anyway get him to stimulate a certain especially sensitive part of the external female genitals
    18Ahunnie's Avatar
    18Ahunnie Posts: 48, Reputation: 7
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    #11

    Mar 9, 2009, 04:47 AM

    Hun we have tried that and it is amazing, but he got used to me doing it while he's going from behind. If feels so good, however, I want him to do it, but it usually takes a while so he just stops
    shyfoxie's Avatar
    shyfoxie Posts: 86, Reputation: 8
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    #12

    Mar 9, 2009, 11:29 AM

    You could always look into a vibrating cock ring or something. That might give enough stim... although, again, it's not him %100 him that's doing it.

    Even if it's taking a while, if he really wants to be helpful, maybe try getting him to not stop. That looks like that's the best way to solve this, seeing as you don't respond all that strongly to intercourse, but you still want him to get you off during it. Or have him go down on you--then at least he'd be the one getting it done.
    shyfoxie's Avatar
    shyfoxie Posts: 86, Reputation: 8
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    #13

    Mar 9, 2009, 11:34 AM
    Oh! And I just remembered something. I find that if near the edge of the bed, facing down, him standing behind me and he goes a little hard and fast with one hand pressing down a little on my , there's enough friction and pressure from contact with the mattress or pillow to work. Just a little strategic pillow placement required, feels nice with satiny material!
    shyfoxie's Avatar
    shyfoxie Posts: 86, Reputation: 8
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    #14

    Mar 9, 2009, 11:35 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by shyfoxie View Post
    Oh! And I just remembered something. I find that if near the edge of the bed, facing down, him standing behind me and he goes a little hard and fast with one hand pressing down a little on my , there's enough friction and pressure from contact with the mattress or pillow to work. Just a little strategic pillow placement required, feels nice with satiny material!
    Grr... censorship. I meant pressing down on my hips or rear.
    MsEmily's Avatar
    MsEmily Posts: 36, Reputation: 6
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    #15

    Mar 9, 2009, 11:50 AM

    Likely, you are stimulating your clitoris with your hand during intercourse, which is not unusual at all. Many women cannot have orgasms vaginally and need clitoral stimulation. Maybe you could show your partner what you are doing and how to do it for you.
    shyfoxie's Avatar
    shyfoxie Posts: 86, Reputation: 8
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    #16

    Mar 9, 2009, 11:52 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by MsEmily View Post
    Likely, you are stimulating your clitoris with your hand during intercourse, which is not unusual at all. Many women cannot have orgasms vaginally and need clitoral stimulation. Maybe you could show your partner what you are doing and how to do it for you.
    She said she was trying to get him to do that. Takes practice.
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