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headache · Feb 19, 2009, 01:11 PM

I really don't know what to do. There is so much history and dramatics surrounding both of our current situations.
Here's a bit of info.
We have known each other for about 15 years, have been like family, have been good friends for most of that time, although we lost touch off and on for quite a bit of that time, I was in a long relationship, and she was in a few, her and a good friend of ours got together and ended up having a daughter, which was the end of their relationship. My long relationship ended over a year ago, and her and I have been spending lots of time together since. She moved away a few months ago to live with her boyfriend, which was really hard for me, but she was here every other weekend, and we hung out every time she was here. Last time I went to visit her, she expressed how she wanted to come home. Now she moved back home and ended that relationship.
She is my best friend whom is always there for me, I am always there for her, She is the only person I talk to everyday, and see as much as possible, and feel like I relate to on so many levels not to mention she is one of the most beautiful people I have ever come in contact with, inside and out, but I don't think I had ever thought much about a relationship for fear of losing the amazing friendship we have... that is until recently.
I have been going through a hell of a time dealing with my most recent ex who is having my baby in the next coming weeks, it hast been a very pleasant experience. I am very excited to father a child, but the mother has not communiacated much with me throughout the whole pregnancy and doesn't want to work with me on custody and equal parenting time. I had been thinking I do want to have another child sometime, but with someone great, and then the thought popped in my head; It would be great to have a child with my best friend, she is the greatest, and to have a child who is half me half her would be the best. That thought freaked me out, as it really made me realize how much I love her, and in my mind that is dangerous, because I don't know what I would do if I ever lost her as a friend.

So that's where I'm at now. We love each other very much, I knew that part, she knew that part. Realizing I would want to grow old with her and have a family with her, not knowing how she would feel about it is tricky. She just ended her relationship a month ago, I'm having a child in a few weeks. Her child's father has been expressing interest in her again. I'm in a mental spiral. I've wanted to say something, because I tell her everything, but I don't want to freak her out, or ruin the amazing friendship we have. But now when I talk to her, it's on my mind and I'm having a hard time.

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Help?

techpro · Feb 19, 2009, 03:01 PM

I think you should tell her how you feel. If you don't do that you may always wonder what your life may have been like if you had told her how you feel.
And if you don't tell her you may never know if she truly feels the same way about you.
As for your idea that you may lose her as a friend, if she truly is as good of a friend as you describe her on here then she will still remain friends with you no matter how you may or may not feel about her!

headache · Feb 20, 2009, 07:58 AM

Thanks. That's what I was thinking too. It just seems so strange, we've known each other since we were 9 and nothing has ever happened.

Justwantfair · Feb 20, 2009, 08:09 AM

How are you having a child in the next few weeks with an ex that you have been separated from for the last year?

Sounds like your life is going through a lot of tramatic drama right now. If she is your best friend why are you concerned about telling her how you feel and seeing her reaction? There is not a doubt in my mind that even if my best friend confessed his love for me and I didn't return the feelings, it would not change the relationship between us. I would give it a shot, but remember everything you are going through, as well as all she is going through, and take the relationship slow.

Good luck and God bless.

Mecha · Feb 20, 2009, 08:16 AM

I agree with techpro tell her how you feel, but make it heartwarming

headache · Feb 20, 2009, 09:05 AM

Originally Posted by Justwantfair

How are you having a child in the next few weeks with an ex that you have been seperated from for the last year?

Sounds like your life is going through alot of tramatic drama right now. If she is your best friend why are you concerned about telling her how you feel and seeing her reaction? There is not a doubt in my mind that even if my best friend confessed his love for me and I didn't return the feelings, it would not change the relationship between us. I would give it a shot, but remember everything you are going through, as well as all she is going through, and take the relationship slow.

Good luck and God bless.

Different ex. I was in a long relation ship that ended at the tail of 2007. Then met the crazy who is having my baby about 9 months ago.
Yes unfortunately tramatic drama has been my life latley, which I am not a fan of. I may tell her tonight. Because now it's on my mind a lot and difficult not to want to bring up when I see her.

Thanks for your input