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ineedsomeadvice · Feb 16, 2009, 08:25 PM

Hi everyone

I need some help please. My husbands' family has always done his taxes for him and now they just assume that they can keep on doing this. I do not want to rock the boat, but I feel that this is something that he and I need to do ourselves.

My mil and sil were asking him to get my ss number and my information so that they can do our taxes.

Can anyone please give me some advice. Do they need to be there when we do our taxes? They have a family owned business and my husbands works for them. The guy who does the taxes has all the info and I don't think they need to be there when we do our taxes. I feel this info is private, or am I being silly?

Please help.

Ace High · Feb 16, 2009, 08:33 PM

Taxes are very personal. If you feel this way about needing privacy, then tell/suggest to your husband that you would prefer to do them yourself or with another tax company. I know that I would not like to have my family knowing all the details of our taxes. They don't need to know everything. Ace

Ace High · Feb 16, 2009, 08:36 PM

Don't feel guilty about wanting privacy. It is your private concern not your In-laws. Stand up for yourself. You can do this. -- Ace

AtlantaTaxExpert · Mar 6, 2009, 04:31 PM

Ace, I have to disagree with you on this.

The accountant for a family business has a much larger view of the overall family situation than the wife of one of the family members. He can make perfectly legal adjustments to both the business' income and the husband's income that are mutually beneficial.

In this case, the wife needs to overcome her paranoia and cooperate unless she has reason to believe that her in-laws are doing something unethical or illegal.

Now, if she wants to go to the final meeting with the accountant and have everything explained in detail, THAT concept I have no problem with.

ineedsomeadvice · Mar 6, 2009, 07:59 PM

Thank you for your input AtlantaTaxExpert

I understand your ignorance about my situation because you do not know me or my in-laws. My mil has gone too far with putting her nose where it does not belong and one time she thought that it is perfectly okay to pry about my sexlife with her son.

As for the taxes: She met with the family accountant and gave him all the info he needed for my husbands taxes. My husband and I met with the accountant yesterday and he got all my personal info from me and I also had the opportunity to ask him questions.

The problem I had was that she just demanded my ss number and any other things that I needed to give the accountant so that she could just do my taxes for me. As nice as this may be, I prefer to take care of these things myself and when this was explained to my mil she got all upset about this.

If you do not think that this is a big deal think about how easily you would give up your ss number and personal info if it were you.

Sincerely,
The Paranoid Wife

Ace High · Mar 8, 2009, 09:00 PM

"Need Some Advice" has more concern going then just "taxes". She is trying to not let someone else exert control over her personal life. There are obvious issues with the wife and MIL. Until these are resolved, hire your own accountant to handle the family stuff. Many things break a family apart and the issues with Inlaws rank pretty high up there. This really is not a tax question. The wife wants the MIL to not be so involved with her personal stuff.