[BabyRae801]

Hello All, Me and my fiancé have been trying to conceive since Jan 2006 NO LUCK, YET. I went to the doctor and they said everythig looked fine, normal. And I;m am not sure whyw e are not getting pregnant yet, its very stressful, and hard to understand. I don't get how many people get pregnant so easy, me and my fiancé have tried many different techniques after sex, and othing seems to work? Any suggestions?

[J_9]

Welcome to AMHD Rae... Hope we can help.

Before we get started, do you have a ring and a date? Just wondering why you want a baby before the marriage. Are you ready if he walks away after the baby is born before you marry him?

That being said... You have not mentioned if you were on any birth control, that will make a great difference.

You also have to take stress into account. Stress will cause problems getting pregnant. I can't say much more unless I know about the birth control first, so let me know and I will tell you what I know.

[BabyRae801]

Well we got our rings, and the resons why we don't have date yet is because we are still planning out a lot of things, it takes 10 months to have a baby(but at the same time you and the baby are growing), it only takes a short time to get married(depending on shuedules, we named a couple dates we would like to get married but we just don't know if we will have everything planned out before those dates, I'm sure we could have everything planned out, but we have a lot going on also), we were trying to conceive before wedding issues came more to the surface, and after these past couple months of not getting pregnant, even when performing on, before or around ovulationg days, I had heard some people get on pills (BC), stop taking them a couple days, and then they ovulate, and that it would be easier for thm to get pregnant, so I have BC pills but have net started taking them, I don't really know what to do, exactly though.

[J_9]

Where in the world did you hear that it takes 10 months to have a baby????????????????????????? :eek::eek::eek:

It is 40 weeks, 9 months maximum. You can be sure that some come within 6, 7 or 8 months.

It is most important to get married, spend time with your hubby, get to know him, let him get to know you, learn each others quirks prior to having a baby. It is easier for him to walk away after the baby is born and there is no wedding than it is you.

Please think this through a little more before you regret any decisions you make.

[BabyRae801]

There are at least 4 weeks in a months, 40 divided by 4 is 10... And yes I do know babies come within 7, 8, most likely 9 months, but 40 is a full term pregnancy which is 10 months. Me and my boyfriend have our own place, have been living together since we started Trying to conceive, we know each other, understand each other, been thrugh ups and downs, and we communicate very well, we pretty much are married, that's anothor reason why we haven't got married yet, or soon. Because we just shrug it off a little like, "we basically are married." Believe we will be married for sure before I 'have' a child. We've been together for years, know each other even longer. Were best friends, we got our 'personalitys down, we know each other and understand each other emotionally, physically, mentally, verbally. Thank you for your help. I have BC pills that I had planne don taking for a while or until marriage, And I think that is what Im going to start doing (taking them until marriage, or until I figure more stuff out.)

[BabyRae801]

>>>then again when 1-3 is first trimester 4-6 is second trimester 7-9 is third trimester, I think I'm including the time conceived.. there's 36-40 weeks in a full term pregnancy

[J_9]

Well, you need to figure more stuff out. I do not mean to be condescending, but I have had 4 children ages range from 20 all the way down to 4, worked in labor and delivery, etc. A baby does not come in 10 months. Period, no question about it. If you hit 41 or 42 weeks your doc freaks and induces.

Human pregnancy is nine months, from the date of conception to the date of delivery.

[LUNAGODDESS]

The baby is just waiting until mommy and daddy get married and the stress of that event has leveled off... How long has it been since your last birth control pill passed your lips?. How long were you on birth control pills?. How old are you? When was your last visit to the doctoe? Has the daddy been checked for sperms? Does he have enough sperm to do the job? (that was not meant to be a joke)... Ask him to visit the doctor and ask for the necessary test to check on the sperm count issue...

[BabyRae801]

I understadn you work with this stuff, there is usually 4 1/2 weeks in a month, either I'm counting from time conceive or last period which is 40 weeks, 10 months. I am not saying you are wrong, indeed you arnt a doc. Would induce labor even before 40 weeks maybe only by a week or a couple days. But 40 weeks is 10 months. That's all I am saying... Then again I must be counting from time conceived or last period, my cousin got pregnany sround MID June her baby is due march 3.. Which that is 9 months so I must be counting from, last period received, so my bad. I wasn't trying to say you were wrong or anything like that. I am not trying to argue, or contridict you. I just got a little confused with myself, my apologies, but now do you understand what I was saying with the whole 10 month thing? I agree me and my boyfriend need some more time 'getting to know eachother' We know basically everything, but I get what your saying... Which is why we haven't exactly decided our wedding day, but we do know that we are connected and we know were getting married, and we both know were meant to be etc etc... We weren't exactly Trying to conceive from the beginning we were having un-protected sex, So basically we were Trying to conceive, if you get that, its kind of confusing. I can get to be confusing sometimes, sorry about that. What Im saying is we didn't exactly know what we wanted then, but we do soemwhat know what we want now, and the only reason why we have continued Trying to conceive, Is because I ahvent yet got pregnant, and were kind of scared we won't be able to have kids, I know it takes time, but its scary, this is the first time Ive ever Trying to conceive.

[J_9]

Luna, there is no reason for Daddy to visit the doc yet, they really will not do anything until 2 years of trying has passed.

Age and stress has a lot to do with this situation, along with education regarding pregnancy.

[BabyRae801]

You have a point with the stress thing, I actually think it would be better to get married before baby making comes into play, but we've went all this tie with no hope( then again people are perfectly normal and have been Trying to conceive for up to 2-5 years), and now were kind of worried it will never happen. I haven't ever taken BC before, I have the pills, and was waiting for the right day to start taking them, my last visit to the doctor for all of this was my ultra sound to see if anything was ab-normal which was 1 week ago, everything looked great, my other doc appt was 2 weeks ago to get a pap smear, STDS testing, & it was also my BC appt, everything turned out normal. My boyfriend last went to the doctor to get checked for STDS etc etc exams, about 9 months ago, I do not think he got his sperm count checked, in which I have encouraging him to do so... He just hasn't got into making the needed appts...

[educatedhorse_2005]

It takes 9 months for a baby.

It sounds like you need to go to some classes before you every consider having kids.

Go see an obgyn and ask him how long it takes for a baby.

How old are you.

Here is web site for you to look at.

Here is a small excerpt from this web site.

Wait a minute! That's almost 10 months! That can't be right!

Actually, if you take 38 weeks and divide by four to get 9 1/2 months, or divide 40 weeks by four to get 10 months, you're calculating lunar months, which are shorter than calendar months.

A lunar month lasts only 28 days, or four seven-day weeks. Most calendar months last for 30 or 31 days. That's why it sounds as if there's more time involved when we count in lunar months although it's not actually true. When we talk about a 40-week pregnancy, we're including the two weeks before the baby was actually conceived.

So depending on when you start counting, you can expect your pregnancy to last 38 or 40 weeks, or about nine calendar months.

http://www.healthatoz.com

[J_9]

Hun, there is no reason to be scared about whether you can get pregnant. Time will come. However, please know that pregnancy is 9 months not 10. Although that is not important.

What is important is that you and your b/f get to know each other, have time together before having a baby. Think this through first.

[BabyRae801]

I must've been counting from time last period was received again in other posts you would have seen that... how many weeks are a full term pergnancy 36-40 weeks... 9-10 months, 36 weeks is 9 months, 4 weeks in each month. 40 weeks is 10 months again 4 weeks in each month.. my bad.

[J_9]

The pregnancy count is by days, not months exactly, it is just easier to say months. Days turn into months. 365 in 12 months and approx 266 in a pregnancy.

[BabyRae801]

Thank oyu very much, for putting that a-side. You're right it does take 9 months, I think I got a little confused with my math, or something is up with me not acknowledging something... And I am thinking everythign through with marriage, and a baby. Making sure evryhting is right.

[BabyRae801]

There you go, educated horse 2005 got me, that's what I was trying to say, my bad... I get what your saying and I also get what I was saying sorry people, didn't mean to make anyone mad or confuse them, if you did get confused just look at educated horse's post and you will understand what I was trying to say, even thought I messed up.. lol

[J_9]

Do you know what all goes into having a baby? Not including labor and delivery, but afterward?

The cost, the time you used to have to yourself that you have to give up? No more parties, few friends, what if the baby has colic or meningitis? Do you have insurance to cover $300 or $400 vaccinations, well baby visits, day care, or can you afford not to work. Diapers are at least $12 a bunch and only last a few days.

Toys, formula, which is a few hundred a month. I know "I will breast feed." What if your baby has acid reflux, then the formula is even more expensive. They need new clothes every couple of weeks at first.

Take your time hon... You are still young, I can tell. You have many years ahead of you, you will be ready then.

I was 22 with my first and I look back now and realize that I was not ready till I had my last at 38, and that was 4 years ago. Don't rush things you might regret.

[kymwm]

Hi. Kind of jumping in in the middle of all of this. I always believed that the actual time frame from conception to delivery was @ 270 days. It was pretty close for both of my kids, as I know the day that I got pregnant, & the day that they were born (lol). I think my son was 272 days & my daughter was 268 days. Anyway, you sound young. How old are you? I really think you should wait until you are married before you start trying. Also, you said things are stressful, confusing & a lot going on. If these are reasons you can't pick a date & plan a wedding, then why do you think a baby is a good idea right now? Trust me, I love my kids, but they definitely add to all of the above! Take your time. Talk to your doctor. Research parenthood! It seems grand, but there are a lot of things that no one ever seems to mention. Then once you have kids you say "why didn't anybody tell me about this part?" While you are researching parenthood, & pregnancy & infertility & planning a wedding, maybe you will get your wish & become pregnant. Also, what is Trying to conceive?

[BabyRae801]

Well I am young for baby & marriage, but I can't give up on love however I (WE) can wait and be patient, for all of this, & wait a while,I was just determined ot get pregnant before thinking EVERYTHING through which I am now decing to do, I start taking my pills in a couple more days, I will continue them until marriage etc etc... I do want to be married before a baby, but I was just worried that it could never happen. But That's why I got my BC pills to wait on a baby until marriage etc etc... If you get what I mean J9. My num. one dream is to become a mom, and have a great relationship with my loved one (spouse, husband)... So I got carried away, for a while...