[CrackPipes]

Basically, me and this girl have been friends for over 3 years now and at first it was just friends but then I started to slowly like her more over time. We have not been on a date yet, we have not kissed either.

But what is confusing me is she keeps changing her mind about us so much and giving me these excuses. When we are together we are up close, hold each other and even hold hands. This obviously led me on to believe she has a certain interest in me, so I tried to take it to the next level and she REJECTED me saying things like "I'm not ready" and "I've always seen you as a friend". So I accepted that and as much as it hurt me, I decided to respect her choice and just stay friends. This is where this story takes a sick twist (in my opinion). When I did that, she started to come on really strongly saying things like "I really want you" and she would get upset when I said "lets stay friends". It almost feels like she is playing games.

At this point we are over the whole friend thing, she obviously wants something more out of it, Im just confused as to what she wants. When I am with her, it seems like she really likes me. If I even clue in on that I don't want anything to happen, she will get upset. Like I said to her "I thought you arent ready" and she would get mad saying "How would you know that? Im ready." and then the next day over the phone she says she isn't, and that she has a lot going in her life that she needs to deal with. So I noticed this pattern and I told her that it seems when she is with me, she wants it but when she isn't with me, she doesn't want it. She told me because it feels like a dream when she is with me, and when she isn't, she goes back to reality and realizes there is a lot on her "plate" and she can't handle a boyfriend. Last time we hung out, she wanted me to kiss her but I didn't because I felt she wasn't ready. She was happy later that she didn't.

Now I really like her, and Im willing to put my 110% into it. All I think about is her, and it hurts knowing nothing will ever happen. Maybe its just not meant to be?

I don't want to be in a relationship unless I know she fully wants it. Right now she seems confused, she half wants it and half doesn't want it. I Don't want that. I don't want to go into a relationship knowing she is not fully committed. So in a sense I'm confused too. My friends keep telling me to stop talking to her, and cut her out of my life. Should I take up my friends advice and stop talking to her? Last time I stopped talking to her because she had rejected me and it hurt really badly, and it later turned out she cried a lot and felt horrible. When I'm with her, it just feels so right but I can't help but second guess if it really is. How can it be right if I like her more? I don't know really what I'm asking, maybe I just wanted to share my story and get some feedback on it. I really don't know, Im just very confused, I think about it a lot and it really puts me in a bad mood. My friends notice it, and they don't like it, it seems like Im drifting away from my friends, they say I'm in my "zone".

Oh another thing is, like sometimes she does something that upsets her which is 100% her fault. But I end up apologizing because I can't stand her being upset. I take the blame for everything. We argue a lot and we haven't even dated yet. I told her we probably wouldn't make a good couple because we argue so much and she said "well that just means we care about eachother" and she also said "best friends sometimes make the best couples".

Part of me wants this to happen, it feels so RIGHT, but then part of me tells me I should stay away because I will get hurt in the process. I have already been hurt by her. What should I do? How do I stop thinking about her? :(

[Justwantfair]

This girl is not ready for a relationship and her constant confusion only proves that.

You do need to take up your friend's advice and walk away, but not doing that you will continue to feel bad and be stuck in the middle. Let her worry about the things she needs to get settled. She is not ready right now to be a friend or a girlfriend to you.

I would start No Contact so that you can heal and she will stop playing games with you.

[CrackPipes]

This girl is not ready for a relationship and her constant confusion only proves that.

You do need to take up your friend's advice and walk away, but not doing that you will continue to feel bad and be stuck in the middle. Let her worry about the things she needs to get settled. She is not ready right now to be a friend or a girlfriend to you.

I would start No Contact so that you can heal and she will stop playing games with you.

That is what I was afraid of :( I stopped talking to her for less than a weeks duration (4 days) and I was so depressed. I was sick to my stomach, I couldn't engage in a conversation with anyone. I would get easily ticked off, road rage etc. When I think of her, I get butterflies in my stomach but at the same time I want her to be happy and if she is not going to be happy with me then I guess that is what I have to do. It is easier said than done though!! :mad: I always seem to go back.