[kaspej]

Hi,

I am very confused right now. I had been in a relationship for about one year. In the beginning this person was completely candid with me and told me they suffered from MS, OCD and two years previously had suffered from a about of clinical depression, whereby they tried to kill themselves and ended up in a ward and underwent therapy. This made me look for any signs of this reoccurring, but saw none. Things were going well, at 5 months in they told me they loved me and a month later, I told them the same. I saw no signs of any problems and we never had an argument and always had a great time together.

Nine months into the relationship, things became very stressful (not between us but outside forces) due to me being laid off, them suffering from another medical condition (which was ultimately corrected by surgery) and one of their family members undergoing a medical crisis. One night towards the end of month eleven, when we were planning to spend the weekend together, they called and said they were on their way down. They never showed. The next day, they called and I was told that they could not see me. I asked if we were breaking up and they said no, I love you, but I am so sick of being sick and so depressed that I need to be alone and away from everyone. I told them that I could respect this but that we needed to stay in touch (keeping the suicide attempt in my mind) and they agreed – they did continue to see their doctor. We spoke nearly every day – lots of crying on their part, ending each call by each of us saying we love you.

Towards the end of month 12 – after being apart for one month, they told me they wanted to come down to my place. When they arrived, it was obvious that the additional anti-depressants prescribed were causing them to be somewhat out of it. We kissed and hugged and said we missed and loved each other. While we were out at dinner, they zoned out at one point and when I snapped them out of it they asked me three times over the next 15 minutes if the soda in their hand was theirs. We went back to my place for awhile and they told me that they would come back tomorrow and stay the rest of the weekend.

The next day they called and asked if I could pick them up. I arrived :confused:and they acted as if they did not know why I was there. They were becoming agitated, so I left. Since then, I have received no calls from them and my calls went unanswered. I now consider us not going out anymore, even though this was never said. I spoke to mutual friends and was told that they are out doing things and appear normal and were told that this person told them that I was told we were through and we had not seen nor spoke to each other in two months! Additionally, they denied that they were ever at my place at the end of month 12. Is this a severe state of depression or something far worse?

[ja77]

Being 100% honest I would have to say that this person was either playing you or they really do have issue's.

I will go with the part at this point with them having mental health issues because you can seem normal to everyone around you, but have a lot going on in your head.

My advise in a way of being a friend with this person would be to put any kind of relationship on HOLD at present and ensure that they are seeing there doctor and being 100% honest with them. The doctor may have given the person some pills that have effected the person in the way to which they have been acting - or this person may have stopped taking the pills correct etc.

At this point I would see no relationship, but if you care for this person be a friend and ensure they get the right help they need.