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    starbuck8's Avatar
    starbuck8 Posts: 3,128, Reputation: 734
    Gone, But Not Forgotten
     
    #1

    Jan 21, 2009, 10:08 AM
    Proof that the world's gone nuts!
    Proof That The World Is Nuts

    In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female.
    Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
    (Like THAT makes sense.)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
    (Do they look different reversed?)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers.
    The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
    (A brick?)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
    (Much worse than 'going blind!')

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
    There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time.
    Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
    (Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
    The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
    (Ah! Justice!)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.
    (But of course!)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
    (Makes one shudder at the thought.)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

    In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
    (I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception:
    Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only 'in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for
    Consumption on the premises.'
    (Is this a great country or what?
    Well, not as great as Guam!)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
    (Who volunteers for these tests?)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
    (From drinking little bottles of -----?)
    (Did our government pay for this research? )

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Butterflies taste with their feet.
    (Ah, geez.)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
    (I know some people like that.)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    Starfish don't have brains.
    (I know some people like that, too.)

    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

    And, the best for last?

    Turtles can breathe through their butts.
    (And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)


    Thank you all for reading this.

    If you need to reach me in the future, I will be in Guam!

    ... or for some of us girls? Meet me in Hong Kong! ;)
    this8384's Avatar
    this8384 Posts: 4,564, Reputation: 485
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Jan 21, 2009, 10:18 AM

    Awesome :D Thanks for the laugh!
    twinkiedooter's Avatar
    twinkiedooter Posts: 12,172, Reputation: 1054
    Uber Member
     
    #3

    Jan 21, 2009, 07:21 PM

    I know you didn't make these up as what could be more whacky than the truth?
    southerngalps's Avatar
    southerngalps Posts: 1,334, Reputation: 112
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Jan 21, 2009, 08:40 PM

    Loved them!

    I think when I have the balls to get married, I'll move to hong kong.

    At least after my heart's broken I can get some good revenge :)
    Stringer's Avatar
    Stringer Posts: 3,733, Reputation: 770
    Business Expert
     
    #5

    Jan 21, 2009, 11:54 PM

    Funny, I seem to have read this somewhere before though.
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Jan 26, 2009, 07:36 PM

    I am so moving to Guam ;)
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
    Uber Member
     
    #7

    Jan 27, 2009, 05:02 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by friend4u178 View Post
    I am so moving to Guam ;)
    I'm going to go with you! :D
    hannapowers's Avatar
    hannapowers Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #8

    Jan 27, 2009, 05:05 AM

    Great one
    ultimate_user_name's Avatar
    ultimate_user_name Posts: 103, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #9

    Jan 27, 2009, 12:20 PM

    These are hilarious,

    I looked up the one about the professional "de-flowerer" sorry guys :( we're going to have to find a different career. That one is false :'(

    If only...
    Stringer's Avatar
    Stringer Posts: 3,733, Reputation: 770
    Business Expert
     
    #10

    Jan 27, 2009, 12:28 PM

    Don't cha just love "Dream Busters" M? :)
    starbuck8's Avatar
    starbuck8 Posts: 3,128, Reputation: 734
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    #11

    Jan 27, 2009, 01:10 PM

    I guess you guys will have to go hang out at the tropical fish stores in Liverpool now then! LOL!
    ultimate_user_name's Avatar
    ultimate_user_name Posts: 103, Reputation: 6
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    #12

    Jan 27, 2009, 01:10 PM

    Lol! XD
    starbuck8's Avatar
    starbuck8 Posts: 3,128, Reputation: 734
    Gone, But Not Forgotten
     
    #13

    Jan 27, 2009, 01:15 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ultimate_user_name View Post
    These are hilarious,

    I looked up the one about the professional "de-flowerer" sorry guys :( we're going to have to find a different career. That one is false :'(

    if only....
    You were on the phone ready to buy your ticket weren't cha! LOL! ;)
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
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    #14

    Jan 27, 2009, 03:28 PM

    Ok might need to head to Bahrain... anyone got a spare mirror :D
    starbuck8's Avatar
    starbuck8 Posts: 3,128, Reputation: 734
    Gone, But Not Forgotten
     
    #15

    Jan 27, 2009, 03:32 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by friend4u178 View Post
    Ok might need to head to Bahrain..........anyone got a spare mirror :D
    Batman... you can't see in a fogged up mirror! :p

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