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    ss_aa_rr_aa's Avatar
    ss_aa_rr_aa Posts: 32, Reputation: -4
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    #1

    Jan 19, 2009, 06:58 PM
    Is it normal for him to feel this way about me!
    Hi.. me and my boyfriend have some issues like any normal couples! We are deeply in love we both know that and feel that way toward each other.. but at some period of times "not always" in our relation we both feel so cold toward each other.. like we both are not happy with our lives.. and we aren't happy with our individual lives.. but together we are amazing.. but bcoz of this frustration of our lives or any thing that bothers us along the way.. we start having distance in our relation.. is that normal? I mean will things be the same when ever "what's bothering my boyfriend" will end? I know I am not bothering him! We had some fights over the last weeks because I thought it was me that he didn't want to be with.. but then I found out that yes he doesn't want to be with me but maybe only because he have in his mind that he should be with me when he really is okay! But he is not okay I can feel it! And it's like he is taking it out on me! With the cold attitude toward me ! And it's not like he means to do that! He just doesn't feel "the love" way toward me! But only bcoz every thing is ordinary.. but I don't want to push him to be normal hot lover with me! Because what ever is bothering him in his life.. is just bothering him! So I want him to feel free to heal what is happening with him.. then when every thing is okay.. to love me all over again! But is it normal to be the second priority for him? I mean okay I feel so bad and today in the morning I made a decision that I am going to leave him and never talk to him again until he come back begging to have me in his life.. but then I thought that was stupid! So I kept my smile on and acted like nothing is wrong! But there is I can feel it in his voice that he is not normal! Please.. if any one can advice me about what to do.. please do! Thank u
    nike 1's Avatar
    nike 1 Posts: 167, Reputation: 16
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    #2

    Jan 19, 2009, 07:19 PM
    I would say to take him at his word and don't read too much into it for now. Letting it go at that would be better than keeping it at the fore front which can lead to more frustration on your part. Go with it and things will pick up again. I'm sure if there's more to it with him, it will come out later with no pressure. Relax about it for now.

    Do you mind if I ask how old you and he are?
    ss_aa_rr_aa's Avatar
    ss_aa_rr_aa Posts: 32, Reputation: -4
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Jan 19, 2009, 07:58 PM

    Thanks for your answer.. he is 25 and I am 20.. I think you are right.. if I let it go and don't push too much it will be better.. but wt I am really scared of is will it be back as it used to be.. because I know married people have these problems as well!
    nike 1's Avatar
    nike 1 Posts: 167, Reputation: 16
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    #4

    Jan 19, 2009, 08:24 PM
    You are right, these things do happen in marriages and other relationships as well. My girlfriend and I are deeply in love with each other and still go through these issues. We have both learned that by doing what I have suggested to you, it prevents a lot of worrying and arguments. Sometimes your so in love with someone that you can become paranoid of any sign of distance. In most cases, there really isn't anything to worry about to begin with. Aren't relationships great!
    ss_aa_rr_aa's Avatar
    ss_aa_rr_aa Posts: 32, Reputation: -4
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Jan 19, 2009, 09:34 PM

    Lol yes they r! :P thank you

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