[XM8]

Hi, I'm Rich, 16 years old.

I live with both parents and we have a pretty big place.. 200m² apartment.. 2 lounges, 2 bathrooms, kitchen and.. only 2 bedrooms.

I've been sharing a room with my sister (she's 2 years younger than me) for.. well forever now and it's gone a bit too far. My parents have tried "seperating" my bedroom into 2 rooms with book cases.. but it's only logical that it has no effect since the book cases are only ~ 2m high and the ceiling in my room goes up to about 4-5m. So I hear my sister all the time.. almost every night she wants to read and does not let me sleep because the light is on.. she is always on my computer, which is in my part of the room, and will not get off it when it's bed time..

Also another problem is, in my sister's part of the room, my mother has put in a TV there with sattellite stations, and she always just comes in and starts watching for hours at a time. She does a lot of house work, no doubt about it but that's when I'm at school and when I'm not, she'll have finished and she'll just be in my room watching the news..

I guess you can imagine this is quite frustrating as I would like some kind of privacy..

I wish she could just throw that damned TV away or go watch the news somewhere else, she's been doing this for almost 5 years now and it's REALLY getting on my tits.

By the way my parents do trust me to some extent, I'm allowed to stay out until about 10pm on Friday because I come home on time every other day.. and when I don't have much work to do I can go out with friends.. They do let me smoke ( after relentlessly nagging me and beating the crap out of me to stop it) and I can drink mild alcoholic drinks but.. it's the privacy that I'm desperate for. Isn't that just a normal part of puberty that my parents should expect?


Oh well.. let me know what you think about this, maybe I'm wrong. Although from what I've seen, all my friends have their own rooms, whether they have siblings or not..

Thanks
-XM8

[stevetcg]

Have you spoken of your issues with your parents?

As an American I am unsure what a 'lounge' is but I assume it is similar to what we call Living Rooms. Is there any way one of those could be converted into something that would give you the privacy you need?

You sound like a good kid and I cannot see any reason why you shouldn't have privacy. Teen age years are points where kids should start having their own space, provided they can care for it themselves. Especially when they have to share space with a sibling of a different gender.

The fact that they tried to separate your room with bookcases shows they are at least trying. Maybe they could go a step further and have a wall put in. Its easy enough to do and relatively inexpensive.

P.S. You shouldn't smoke. Someday you will want to quit and it just gets harder as the years go on...

[Fr_Chuck]

If there is no third bedroom, there is just nothing you can do about it, sisters often have to share a room till they move out.

I would say that you will really miss the sister one day, but that day is not today

[artlady]

Ya ,you need your own room as does your sister.

Is there a basement where you can have your own digs?

Ask your parents if they had privacy when they were your age.

Ask them if they would like to be in the situation that you are in now when they were 16?

No it is not cool and unless you are very poor they should try to give you your own space.

I would tell them that they need to change their sleeping arrangements so that you and your sister can have the privacy you deserve.

[XM8]

Thanks to all for your replies..

@ Stevectg I'm sorry I did mean living room, I'm just used to calling it a lounge for some reason.. can't remember... I'm english lol

As for being a good kid.. well I used to be pretty wild, skip school, get drunk all the time but I've cleaned my act up and my parents have regained trust in me to some extent so it's OK now. I doubt not having any trust in me would be a reason to not let me have my own room.

I guess their really isn't any way for me to have my own room.. the living rooms just can't be converted into bedrooms, they're way too big and it would be extremely inconvenient for everyone.

My parents did try to give some kind of privacy to both me and my sister by putting in the book cases, but I'm afraid rationaly it doesn't have the same effect a wall would.

The problem with getting a wall put in, is that it's extremely expensive, and I mean expensive. Plus the building I live in used to belong to some Baron (I live in austria btw) and it's got these lovely decorations cemented into the ceiling, so a wall would kind of ruin it.

My dad expects me to leave this house once I'm done with university.. in my early 20s. He said that he would eventually have to get a wall put in, maybe in a few years.
I'm not against the idea of staying here until I finish university because I appreciate the fact that my parents pay for everything and love me. But I'm still human and I still want some privacy so.. something has to change I guess.

It's a bit hard having none because I can't do anything personal (from having a phone call, to crying) without having someone else in the room.

Well then... I'm out of ideas, I just don't know what to do. I really appreciate any help from you guys.

Thanks,
-XM8

P.S.

You're right about smoking Steve. I'm going to stop when I finish high school in 2 years ( I hope) because being in front of school is a trigger for me to smoke. Bizarre..

[iLy541]

I know how you feel, talk to your parents and let them know this is serious and you mean business. Maybe they could talk to your younger sister and limit her entertainment. Trust me if you talk to them in a serious mature tone they will understand.
P.S. finish school, go to college, move out and trust me you will have all the privacy you deserve

[XM8]

I know how you feel, talk to your parents and let them know this is serious and you mean business. Maybe they could talk to your younger sister and limit her entertainment. Trust me if you talk to them in a serious mature tone they will understand.
P.S. finish school, go to college, move out and trust me you will have all the privacy you deserve

I guess I'm going to do that, you're right they probably will understand better that way.

And euh.. I'm planning to do that anyway.. just finish high school, go to medical school if I get lucky and then get my own place.

Thanks for your reply

-XM8