DOCS Don't hear us... what's wrong?
I will try to make this as short as possible. I need help here. BIGTIME. I have 3 kids one of which I have been concerned about for a very long time now. He's one month shy of 15. Since birth he was tough. Crying continually, nothing soothed him except the running of a vacuum, this went on until he was 10 months old. Docs dubbed it as colic (for 10 months?). Then his brother was born when he was 20 months. Old... he was very very mean, beyond avg. sibling rivalry, hitting him on the head all the time, biting and pinching etc. This has NEVER stopped, it has gotten worse. (as they got older he has become a bully, making his younger bro his slave). Around age 6 my son started a fire behind our house with matches. The fire dept. was called, there was no damage (thank goodness). Around this time he was diagnosed w/ADHD and medicated. It seemed to work... grades improved and so did his energy levels.
In 2002, he keyed 18 cars at a local shopping amll with a cousin of ours, he was caught by the authorities and ordered to pay $4200 in restitution. He has made no efforts in earning money to pay back. If we go to court on the 24th of June 2004 without a pmt, he will go to juvenille detention. He knows this.
He made a remark to me while being assessed for outpatient care in February 2004 when asked about being cruel to animals, he claimed to the nurse he hadn't been. But when we left that day, he said to me "Mom, when my kitten would poop in my room on the floor, it would make me soooooo mad that I would pick up the kitty and squeeze it so hard, sit on it that it would be flopping around trying to breath." Needless to say, the kitten came up missing a month or so later never to be found again.
Another concern, my 5 year old daughter was around 3 or so, and she made a comment that her big brother made her play a game and it was called "The Pee Pee Game". I asked her about it and she said he would pull his pants down and pee on her under the covers. I was alarmed by this and confronted him, and it continued to be brought up, until finally it was never brought up again after I explained the consequences. I have also been told that he has shown pornographic magazines to my 2 stepkids who are 6 and 8 and that he also was talking biligerently to them. I am highly alarmed and scared to death about these allegations. In my heart I believe it to be true. But can't get him to admit, he makes me think it's me that's crazy and how dare I think of my son like that.
Now, he is just plain rude, defiant, won't do anything I ask, I get f/you, you're a bit*h, I hate you, NO I am not going to do that, I don't have too, I'm not going too, anything you can think of he says. There are no drugs no alcohol nothing like that involved. There is mental illness in the family... bipolar, adhd, depression, and seasonal effective disorder.
I think the numerous doctors I have taken him to have related this to his life and the things that have surrounded it... ie my poor decision making, poor choices in men, but I have always shown love and I have always proveded all three of my kids with the correct care needed for anything. Please help with any suggestions, I am very tired and can't handle much more. Although I WILL NEVER give up, for this too, will pass.
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