[HistorianChick]

Hi guys. I'm here, checking in, and now I'm leaving.

JR KISSES all around!

'Night! :D

[startover22]

You sound much better Chicky! Good, that's real good!

[ISneezeFunny]

Hmm... that "treat" to stringman...

... she looks a tad bit old, no?

I mean, from the neck up.

Neck down, I give it... 2 months.

[Stringer]

hmm...that "treat" to stringman...

...she looks a tad bit old, no?

I mean, from the neck up.

Neck down, I give it...2 months.

Agreed, but I didn't choose to offend...

[Stringer]

Daily Email Newsletter - Funniest Video of the Day

[Stringer]

My doctor is wonderful. Once, when I couldn't afford an operation, he touched up the x-rays.
-Joey Bishop
Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
-Ronald Reagan
I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house.
-Zsa Zsa Gabor
If you look like your passport photo, you're too ill to travel.
-Will Kommen
Insanity doesn't run in my family. It gallops.
-Cary Grant
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.
-Robert Orben
Misers aren't fun to live with, but they make wonderful ancestors.
-David Brenner
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I've finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.
-Dave Barry
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.
-Roseanne Barr
To attract men, I wear a perfume called New Car Interior.
-Rita Rudner
If you love something, set it free. Unless it's chocolate. Never release chocolate.
-Renee Duvall
The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served us nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
-Calvin Trillin
I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.
-Rodney Dangerfield
My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.
-Rita Rudner
My husband wanted one of those big-screen TV's for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already.
-Wendy Liebman
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
-Douglas Adams
I have an aunt who married so late in life that Medicare picked up 80 percent of the honeymoon.
-Don Reber
I hate housework - you make the beds, you do the dishes - and six months later you have to start all over again.
-Joan Rivers
My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
-Henny Youngman
Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes.
-Bob Thaves

[Stringer]

And another one... are you smiling yet?

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her
Return, her Father cussed her.
"Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother thru?"

The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....Dad....I became a prostitute..."
"Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this Catholic family."

"OK, Dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a $5 million savings certificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex. And for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club........................ (takes a breath)............. and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera and... ..."

"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says Dad.


Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff....a prostitute Daddy! Sniff, sniff."
"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant. Come here and give yer old Dad a hug."

[Alty]

LMAO, it's so sad that it's funny! :)

I see that some of the gang has checked in, even our elusive little Sneezy.

Sneezy, she's not old, she's probably younger than me, you little stinker, stop trying to make me feel old, I'm only 38. Eeeek, when you write it down it doesn't look good, where did the 2 go? :(

Someone shoot me! :(

[jrebel7]

Hi Ya'll!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, it is good to be back home! Looks like it is michief as usual! Just dropped in on the Rebel to say hello and will vvvvrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrooooooooommmmmmmmmmm out of here for now...................!!! Later all!

[retsoksirhc]

Rets(y), present and account for :)

[startover22]

I am not going to vacuum till Sears makes one I can ride on. Love it Stringer.

Reb, hey you fast lady;)
Hi Rets and Sneeze!

[retsoksirhc]

Hiya starty! How are things going?

[retsoksirhc]

Sneezy, she's not old, she's probably younger than me, you little stinker, stop trying to make me feel old, I'm only 38. Eeeek, when you write it down it doesn't look good, where did the 2 go? :(

Someone shoot me! :(

It'll be here in 4 years :) lol

[startover22]

Going well, just getting out of bed late and being lazy. My fave days are Sunday, espeially when there are no early plans;) How have you been? How were the holidays for you?

[retsoksirhc]

It's going pretty well, except for the fact that my car died yesterday :(

Moved into my own apartment again, got a better job, all the good stuff :)

[startover22]

Awww.. poor car.
Sounds like you are on fire other wise;)

[startover22]

I don't know anything about Geo Prisms... sorry sweet Rets;)
CaptainRich is a great mechanic... I am sure he will see your post as soon as he can;)

[retsoksirhc]

Lol. No big deal. I can get a ride to work if I need one, a coworker live in the next apartment complex over. It just kindof sucks that I have to take the bus if I want to go anywhere right now. I'd hop on my bike or strap on my skates, but this dang Michigan snow...

[startover22]

Mmmm, could be pretty fun trying to get your bike out... not your skates though;)

Morning Stringer... I see you

[retsoksirhc]

Lol. Yeah, I saw them plowing the sidewalks last night, while the towtruck was bringing me home. Maybe I could get through.

I'm thinking I'd rather use a 'bike' than a bicycle, come spring.Now just to get the motorcycle endorsement on my drivers license...